We were out for a meal for my other uncle's birthday and my aunty and uncle arrived. My uncle said to my Dad, jokingly (who's birthday it also was) "You look good for 70 (he's nearly 10 years younger). Then he said to me "You look good for 40 (i'm neatly 10 years younger). That was fine, as he was just joking. But then he went on "You need to put weight on though. If you stand sideways, you'll disappear." I'm the correct weight for my height and said "If the doctor says I'm alright, I'm alright. I'm not going to put weight on to please you." He said "Men like women with meat on them." I said "Not all men do." He said "Well, I wouldn't like to put my arm round you, just like I wouldn't like to put my arm round your aunty" (a different aunty). I said "You can't compare me to her, I weight 8 1/2 stone and she weighs 5 1/2 stone." And this is coming from a guy who is overweight and looks 9 months pregnant! Why couldn't he have just said "Oh you look nice"? Was I right to stand up to him?
2007-11-05 02:58:16 · 9 answers · asked by coz_6 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
But he's constantly going on about my figure, but he doesn't understand that this is how I'm meant to be. I couldn't gain that much weight if I tried. And I'm sure he did mean to get into a debate, he winds everyone up.
2007-11-05 03:06:15 · update #1
I did acually say to him "It's not me that needs to put weight on, it's you that needs to lose it." He didn't have dessert after his meal, but I don't know if it was because I said that or not, lol. But he shouldn't have been nasty to me. If he's going to dish it out, he will have to take it.
2007-11-05 03:10:31 · update #2
It's not that easy to ignore when he says things everytime I see him. He even calls me twiggy! I might start calling him Humpty Dumty, lol.
2007-11-05 03:13:23 · update #3
I think he's secretly jealous of my figure and wants me to gain weight so he will look thinner, lol.
2007-11-05 03:14:12 · update #4
Oops, i made a few typos in all that!
2007-11-05 08:42:15 · update #5
Hi Coz(mo!): Well, you know, sometimes those fat slobs (and yes, I may call your obnoxious uncle that for I live too far away from him to really matter!!! So!!) feel so insecure in themselves that they have to make everyone around them miserable too! And that is the basic problem here: Your common garden variety fat slob invariably always feels insecure and have an extremely low self-esteem. I mean, wouldn't you too, if you looked nine months preggos for EVER!!!??? Ironically their wrath is usually aimed at the sleek and slender - like you weighing in at 8,5 stone, and your somewhat more slender auntie of 5,5 stone . . . As for his "threat" that he'd never put his arms around you: Be extremely thankful . . . have you ever been hugged by a Sumo wrestler?? Believe me, its NOT FUNNY!!!
Despite the commonly acceptable good manners: "Though shalt show respect for thine elders!", etc. - I personally would have advised him to shove his sick comments somewhere where it'll hurt and form a stoppage in the natural food processing chain of events . . . in no uncertain terms! But, then, I'm your Da's age, and I would dare to do so . . . (AND I simply do NOT tolerate obnoxious uncooth ill-mannered *sses!!!)
Luckily those "family get-togethers" don't last too long, and a bit of patience and some carefully planned avoidance of said gross uncles (and aunts and cousins who slobber all over you in their insistance of plastering kisses all over your face!!!!), and you may just "survive" them with minimal damage! Let's face it, there is always the odd handsome cousin / attractive / sexy niece, or two, etc. to make up for those baddies!! LOL!!!
Please allow me to say what he was simply to self-centered to notice: "You look nice!" (and that is the understatement of the year!!! BTW: I wish I could wrap my arms around your slender body . . . which I do recall seemed rather attractive . . . and damn sexy!!!)
XXX
Q
2007-11-05 04:59:36 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I tell you what, you were a lot more polite than I would have been! Nobody has the right to make intimate comments like that, especially a particularly rubbish specimen of the opposite sex. Family members sometimes think it is their God given right to say the most insulting and personal thing they can think of. If he tries it again, don't even enter into an argument. Just ask when the baby is due.
2007-11-05 03:05:36 · answer #2 · answered by retro_girl34 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He was just commenting, and i'm sure that he didn't mean to get into a debate about your size/weight.
If you are comfortable at your weight, and feel healthy, then you are ok, if you ask me.... better to be thin than overweight.
In my eyes, this topic wasn't even worth a debate... to each his own opinion, i guess?
2007-11-05 03:03:12 · answer #3 · answered by letterstoheather 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You played right into his hand. If you had ignored him, he would have had nothing to build on. The whole family knows how he is so be the adult in the group and just act like you didn't even hear him.
2007-11-05 03:30:38 · answer #4 · answered by jcf6865 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd ignore him. He's not a happy person. If he was he wouldn't be putting you down. Thin is in. Don't react to anything he says and he'll stop making rude comments.
2007-11-05 03:22:54 · answer #5 · answered by shellshell 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's your uncle, he's kidding around somewhat, and he means well. Take his comments in polite stride, and move on.
2007-11-05 03:10:54 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like your uncle is a pervert.
2007-11-05 03:05:33 · answer #7 · answered by Rooster 1972 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds a bit like he was just joking around, and you overreacted. i think you shouldnt have argued in that way, but rather say "it hurts me when you say things like that"
2007-11-05 03:04:09 · answer #8 · answered by KAY9090 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think hes just trying to have fun.
2007-11-05 03:16:25 · answer #9 · answered by HunnyBunny 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋