hi everyone..
heres the deal: i broke up with my ex MJ a year ago and i haven't seen him since then.2 weeks ago i ran into him in the mall where he owns a pet's shop.we talked for a while and after 3 days i sent him an sms then he called. we agreed on staying friends but i didn't tell him that i'm dating someone.
i like MJ alot and i love talking to him and hanging out with him he is like a big brother to me.sometimes i feel he gets me more than my bf. but i love my bf to death and i don't want him to know about this but at the same time i want to keep MJ as a friend.
i'm really confused please somebody help
2007-11-04 23:53:12 · 12 answers · asked by blossom0016 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
There can never be too many good friends! :)))
2007-11-05 00:04:02 · answer #1 · answered by Olga 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In theory it's ok - there's no rules or laws......But what will happen if you and your bf get more serious and then he finds out? Remember your ex is an ex for a reason.
In fact, your current bf should be everything good your ex was – and more, and if he was why would you bother talking to your ex. Otherwise he is not right for you.
I think you should be looking at your current relationship though – if you look closely you will see that your ex fills a gap your current bf doesn’t. This means your relationship with your current bf needs your ex to be around in order for you to feel all your needs are being met. This is unfair to your current bf on many levels – he doesn’t know what holes he has to fill and you are living a secret life behind his back. That may be ok in the short term but long-term prospects aren’t good. Sometime or another you ex will get a new woman and she’ll stop him from talking to you (as she has every right), and that will leave a hole in your life that will ruin your current relationship.
2007-11-05 00:04:05 · answer #2 · answered by Paul M 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It only works if there's complete honesty all around. Your ex needs to know that you are seeing someone and you are not interested in getting back together. Your boyfriend needs to know that you've remained friends with your ex but friendship is where it ends. If you can't be honest with these two, then it could be cause for trouble.
If the shoe was on the other foot, wouldn't you want to know that your boyfriend was friends with an ex and had no desire for more than friendship, and his ex was fully aware of you and his desire to be with only you?
2007-11-05 00:04:07 · answer #3 · answered by Erin 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you need to let "MJ" know that you have a boyfriend and you need to let your boyfriend know that you saw your ex. If you don't, it looks like you're hiding something and you risk losing your boyfriend. Not telling your boyfriend, is completely dishonest.You should include your current boyfriend when you spend time with "MJ". If you're serious about just being friends, then your boyfriend should know and have the option of getting to know your ex.
2007-11-04 23:59:14 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
the problem here is the 'I don't want to tell my boyfriend' - that indicates that yes, indeed, this is a problem - the problem is compounded by the fact you didn't tell the ex about your current boyfriend
when you're hanging out with your ex, where does your boyfriend think you're doing? this trail will lead to lies and end with a break-up
inevitably the cat will get out of the bag and then there will be hurt feelings and drama
2007-11-05 00:00:37 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Id say your creating a situation NOT because yous hanging out with him or even that you want to.Because your lying to both of them.You know itll come out eventually and by then it will look alot worse to everyone involved.Id come clean and express how you feel about both.Good luck!
2007-11-04 23:59:30 · answer #6 · answered by LADY LUCK 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yea, staying friends with your ex doesn't mean anything but you should tell your bf, because if he sees you out with him he may think something else is going on and thats not a good thing.
2007-11-04 23:57:57 · answer #7 · answered by Kal-el 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Not if you want to keep your boyfriend - it is highly likely that he will NOT understand what you are doing hanging around with your ex.
2007-11-05 00:02:06 · answer #8 · answered by cuddles_gb 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO its not ok. It means that u r still in to ur ex. if u want to get over ur ex, get over it properly and move on.
2007-11-04 23:58:25 · answer #9 · answered by Niel 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
lol. No that's not ok. How would you feel if your boyfriend did that with another girl??
If you want to do that, be single first.
2007-11-04 23:56:17 · answer #10 · answered by myleslr 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
YOU CANT HAVE YOUER CAKE AND EAT IT. IM SORRY. HONESTY IS VERY IMPORTANT IN A RELATIONSHIP, FRIENDSHIP OR SUMTHING MORE. YOU NEED TO ASK YOURSELF WHY YOU FEEL THE NEED TO NOT DISCLOSE YOUR FRIENDSHIP WITH BOTH GUYS.
2007-11-05 00:07:29 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋