one of the Ten Commandments?! I'm 15 and recently I came forward and exposed a man for sexual abuse. He knew he was going to end up in prison for pretty much the rest of his life, so this morning he committed suicide so that he couldn't go to prison. I'm Christian and now my Christian friends and youth leaders are saying that I broke the Commandment "Thou shalt not kill" because if I hadn't come forward he wouldn't be dead right now. So basically they think I killed him. Is this really my fault and did I really break "Thou shalt not kill"? My friends and youth leaders believe I'm a disgrace now and they refuse to be anywhere near me. Even one of the pastors was talking about it behind my back.
2007-11-04 14:29:55 · 74 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
BTW, my parents and I DO plan on leaving this church.
2007-11-04 14:30:19 · update #1
For those of you who don't understand why youth leaders and pastors are blaming me it's because he was a very prominent person at the church. And he helped the church out ALOT.
2007-11-04 14:45:12 · update #2
Hi
I have seen something very similar to what You describe
More than once sadly
I would like to relate this to You if I may and hopefully at the end You may see what happens when a person chooses to do nothing
In my Country [UK] There was a Doctor Called Shipman I think American People would term him a MD [A Family Doctor]
This Guy went on to murder hundreds of his Patients The true figure may never be known
Even though it came to light other Medics had grave suspicions No one had the courage to speak out enough for action to be taken
Reading Your story I can only admire Your courage I would agree with the vast bulk of the responses here You have nothing to blame Your self for
Many Blessings To You
xxx
2007-11-05 04:05:32 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Oh my!!! If this is a real story, which I am assuming it is....then I cannot begin to believe why or how they could be blaming you in any such way!?!
It does not matter that he was prominant in the church or that he helped the church a lot. What he did was wrong, whether it was to you or to somebody. When you do something like that, you have to pay the consequences. It was his decision to commit suicide rather than accepting the blame for what he did.
I am not sure what church you are attending, but I am very surprised that they would be more focused on giving you the third degree rather than trying to take care of you and his victims after he was exposed.
It is sad that he committed suicide, but that was not your fault. You didn't expose him so that he would commit suicide, you did because you felt it was the right thing to do considering a sexual offender can be and is a dangerous person to be around.
May God bring you and your church comfort and peace in this difficult time.
With peace and love in Christ
2007-11-04 17:43:58 · answer #2 · answered by WhiteTiger29 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry that your church family who should be supporting you through this difficult time is turning against YOU. You did not hold a gun to the man's head and force him to kill himself so you did not break one of the ten commandments. The only disgrace that I can see is that your friends and church are turning their backs on you (I am assuming that you were abused and I have the deepest sympathy for you) You are an example of courage and should never doubt your actions. The abuser deserved to be tried and convicted and sentenced to prison and he freely chose to take the easy way out and commit sucide. I cannot imagine a pastor or church trying to blame a young teenager for an adult's suicide.
2007-11-04 14:37:00 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Young Lady
If this is true what You are saying
Of course this is not Your fault and these People should know far better
What You done took great courage
The alternative would be to do nothing then this Person would re - offend [they always do] You will never know how many People You have saved It could be one It could be a hundred
This is where it ended as far as You are concerned
What transpired after that it doesn't concern You at all and You will never be held responsible
You are not a disgrace Your Parents have every reason to be extremely proud of You
Not all People are like this and as You get a little older You will see what I have tryed to explain to You is true
In the meantime enjoy Your life and please don't worry
Edit
Will You look at all these People
Doesn't the truth jump out at You
I have never seen such a response I take my hat off to all of you
Good Luck Young Lady x
2007-11-04 15:07:25 · answer #4 · answered by Human Being Human 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
WOW! If what you is saying is true, and these "Christians" are blaming you for this man's death, I am flabbergasted.
I would consider THEM a disgrace, and I would choose not to be around THEM. Tell me, do you think Jesus would talk to you like that? Do you think that Jesus would blame you>
The answer, of course, is NO. What about his commandment DO NOT JUDGE ONE ANOTHER. If you want to stand tall and KNOW that you are O.K. when one of them talks to you like that again, turn around and say "and Jesus said, DO NOT JUDGE you are the ones breaking Gods commandments. I saved someone else from being abused, and I AM PROUD OF IT. Then turn around, out of that church and never go back again.
That's my suggestion and if you want a happy life, amongst happy and non-judge mental people, that is what you will do.
You cannot stand and take that garbage and then complain about it. DO something about it.
I am proud of you and I don't even know you. You did the right thing and probably did save another person from getting sexually assaulted.
Good for you!!
2007-11-04 14:39:22 · answer #5 · answered by Maureen S 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your 'friends' are not so. Had you NOT come forward the man could have hurt or killed others. As I don't know the circumstances the man in question was sick to say the least and NOTHING you could have done would have prevented a 'sin'. The man was a coward and a sick person. It IS sad that he did take his life but that was HIS choice NOT yours and you did NOT violate ANY commandment.
In many ways his sin was punished appropriately as rape in many cases was punishible by DEATH in the Old Testament.
Does your church feel that the vets and active men and women in our armed forces are killers? Do they feel that Joshua was a murderer when he killed the people as he led the Israelites into the promised land.
Those friends of yours are basically saying that it's better to let someone rape and steal the innocence of others than to risk having him commit suicide. They are small insecure people who take delight in demeaning others in righteous ignorance.
That church is full of hypocrites and is a DISGRACE to all that the Bible represents as they seem accept sexual misconduct as acceptable in the eyes of God.
2007-11-04 14:42:46 · answer #6 · answered by leighjam 3 · 3⤊ 1⤋
If this man was abusing you or others sexually and you were aware of it then you did the right thing. This man who chose to take advantage of his influence and the innocence of minors for his own sexual pleasure and then take his own life will now answer to God for his sins. Those who claim to be your Christian friends and youth leaders are the real sinners by judging you unjustly and were never really your friends or leaders in the first place. If a pastor is blaming you for this man's death then he is a disgrace and will someday answer to God's judgment.
Search your own heart for God and He will be there for you when you need Him. God does not live in any church or man-made structure but rather in the hearts of those who welcome Him. Your Church has let you down but God will not. Learn to pray to God in your own words and you will develop a personal relationship with Him as I have done.
God Bless!
AAD
2007-11-04 19:05:09 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous A.D. 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Let me tell you this: In the original Hebrew, "thou shalt not kill" meant to not murder basically. (not intended killing) If you accidentally killed someone, that doesn't count. And btw, everyone breaks the ten commandment.
A church is made of a group of sinners who were saved by God's grace. If people are not willing to talk to you, pray that God will forgive them for their immaturity. Don't feel bad. No matter what you do, God will always love you.
2007-11-04 14:35:28 · answer #8 · answered by pinkviolinistofthelord 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You did the right thing! Your church must have been a cult or something because I don't see where they are coming from. Anyways you did the right thing to help preventing this guy from doing this to any other girls. You did not kill him he killed himself, you had nothing to do with his death. He broke the commandment himself, so dont worry find a new church and start your life over again. Sorry that happened to you, best regards!
2007-11-04 14:34:56 · answer #9 · answered by krogerpharmtech 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
YOU did nothing wrong. You did the right thing by coming forward, and preventing this man from hurting anyone else. He is to blame for both the abuse, and committing suicide. Don't let anyone tell you any differently.
And, yes, you and your parents should find another church.
2007-11-04 14:34:16 · answer #10 · answered by Cylon Betty 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋