I've beern with this guy for about 3 weeks.. I wasn't really that into him. I guess I just wanted to fall in love fast to get over my ex. I don't like him that much though he's awesome. I keep getting depressed every now and then. He thinks I'm over my ex and I'm not (we had been broken up for over 10 months)... Even when I'm with him I think of my ex. I just don't love this guy I don't feel it, can't see it, I want to be depressed by myself I don't want anyone to be around me. How do I break up without hurting him or hurting his ego. Help me .. He's gonna ask me why what do I say??? I don't like you!? I can't see a future with you!?? I want a copy of ny ex!? I'm not ready???? What can I say.?? Problem here really really likes me and even started faaling in love with me that's why I wanna break it now before he gets attached...
2007-11-04 10:22:49 · 26 answers · asked by leave me alone 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
tell the truth!!!! there is no way around this! no matter how you tell him he will be hurt but not as bad as if you lie and make up some off the wall story, at least then he will have closure! I think that is your hang up your ex did not give you closure and see what it is doing to you? Tell him he is a nice guy and you would just like to be his friend because your are not ready or able to give your all to him like he is ready to give his all to you. and let him know that thing about your ex.
2007-11-04 10:32:27 · answer #1 · answered by alexia's mommy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You cant avoid hurting him but you can explain that you are just not ready yet. Say that you really appreciate the support and say you just want to be friends. Actually just being friends hardly ever works but you never know, you might change and you don't want to burn all your bridges.
Can you get away for a time out by yourself? Or go and visit an old relative in another state or the country?
I think you are wise to break it now but don't make the break to messy to be able to remain pleasant acquaintances.
2007-11-04 18:33:54 · answer #2 · answered by happylady216 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well honestly i was just in that exact situation...i understand that you're not over your ex.. it may take awhile before you feel like you are. I think that you should tell the new guy the truth! explain to him that you realize that you still have strong feelings for your ex. Tell your new boyfriend that you need time apart to think aboutt what you want and explain to him that you jumped into the relationship too soon. And just remember that someones feelings always gets hurt in any relationship so if telling him the truths hurts his feelings then he will just have to learn to live with it like your trying to do with your ex-boyfriend. And if he doesnt understand that then it just wasn't meant to be in the beginning.
let me know what happens
kay
2007-11-04 18:32:46 · answer #3 · answered by curious kay 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he is keen on you then breaking it off with him may hurt him but hey, that's life. Excuses are usually a dishonest way to 'let him down.' Respect him enough to tell him the truth. If it's a personal failing of his then at least he will have a chance to correct it for next time.
If it's just 'I don't think you're the one', then thats ok too.
2007-11-04 18:33:41 · answer #4 · answered by Lyall M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him the truth!
Don't worry about hurting him. He will get over it. TYou are still attached with the ex in your heart. He is not the right guy for you. It is simple. If he does not respect that, then you can get creative. You can say you are entering a contest to see how many men you can have sex with in 24 hrs.
2007-11-04 18:30:51 · answer #5 · answered by estee.tabernac 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Tell him that he deserves someone who is in the right frame of mind for a relationship, and tell him that you are not there right now. Tell him clearly that the timing is bad, but that clearly it is not going to work out. Tell him he deserves something better than a rebound. Either way, if he is into you, he will be hurt so rip the bandage of quick and make sure that he knows its over.
2007-11-04 18:29:00 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Honesty is the best policy. If the shoe was on the other foot, how would you feel??? One bad apple can spoil the whole bunch. Theres a thin line between love and hate. I'd rather be let down easy than to be dogged.
2007-11-04 18:28:50 · answer #7 · answered by lil red 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I agree. Be honest, don't play games, don't argue, don't be mean, don't be subtle (men don't pick up on that), be kind, and understand that he will be upset. Anyone who suffers rejection is going to be upset. You can tell him that the chemistry just isn't there. He deserves someone who will love him for the great guy he is.
You are smart to recognize that there is no future for this relationship. The sooner you do it, the better for both of you.
2007-11-04 18:29:54 · answer #8 · answered by Momsdiamonds 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
hmm.. try this line "i dont think our relationship will work out, i have a problem".. tell the guy stuff like the one im using "problem" but let it point out to u like ur the one messin up so he doesnt feel bad then u wudnt be hurting him. say sumthing wrong with u or sumthing like u dont understand urself sumtimes and some of it are the reasons why u guys fights. make sure it points out to u so u wont hurt him.
gud luck!
2007-11-04 18:31:06 · answer #9 · answered by PLeCX 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
breaking up is never easy, and regardless of what you say he will be hurt. however, you have to be honest because if you're not, he may try to change to try to win you back. you have to let him know that he's just not for you and you should do it soon so that you are not leading him on any more than you already have. good luck!
2007-11-04 18:34:04 · answer #10 · answered by :-) 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋