My youngest daughter is a freshman in collgege. She has a learning disability and she did not do very well in high school (SAT WISE).
She got accepted granted she took a summer start program. She did it and passed! I feel this school is helping my daughter succeed toward her future. Because of her disability they are allowing her to create her classes earlier then all of the rest of the students As well as she is getting counciling and getting a student tutor for her one class! Many schools would not offer this kind-of assistance!!
I will admit my daughter had a VERY rought start to college. Moved in with a good friend...friend moved out due to illness, daughter got stuck with a Jehova Wittness with which my daughter had to move out (the girl was crazy) then my daughter was placed in the sports dorm! She hated it there so housing moved her to her own dorm in another building until next semester when she will be moving to ANOTHER DORM to live with her friend!
2007-11-04 08:59:55 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Now my daughter is considering transfering to another University next year!!
It breaks my heart to see her leave! I think this is a good school for her!! I'm almost crying thinking about the transfer!!
I know this sounds crazy but I want her to stay at that university!! She needs to realize every college is the same!!
Her concerns are she has very few friends, she comes home EVERY WEEKEND because people do not stay much on the weekend and she hates that it's in the middle of nowhere.
I have forced her to stay at the campus
refusing to pick her up because she NEEDS NEEDS to get used to the university and NEEDS to love it!!!
This is killing me as a parent!!
My daughter schedule all these dates to look at other Universities and i refuse to go with her!!
ONE because they are all near christmas time
and TWO because she needs to learn to like the college she is at!!
Am I being a bad parent??
I feel this is best for my daughter
2007-11-04 09:03:23 · update #1
And your question is?
2007-11-04 09:02:55 · answer #1 · answered by ZCT 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I don't get it, YOU are upset with your daughter and almost crying or your daughter is upset and almost crying? Whatever the case, life is tough when you are 18-22 and there is a lot of moving and it can be a lonely and frustrating time. But these things make young people grow and they need to stare down these situations and use it to toughen themselves up. The alternative is not being prepared for the real world and it's difficulties.
2007-11-04 09:05:18 · answer #2 · answered by The Scorpion 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think maybe you are afraid that she will be moving away from you and that you can't be there for her if she needs you. She is starting to make some big decisions on her own and that is a big step. You should try to support her in this and even help her find where she wants to go. At least you will be there to help her choose and can ask her the right questions to help her make her choice. She's gaining more confidence in herself. Have some faith in her. It is a big step for her and she needs your support and guidance.
2007-11-04 09:10:03 · answer #3 · answered by randmthots 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You sound (can I say it) overprotective but at the same time guilty that you feel that way. There are a couple of reasons why I say that one, she turns to you for rides rather then finding her own, two you question each time you say no to her whether you are doing the right thing or not, three she expects you to accompany her to the different colleges without even thinking of asking other friends to go with her or checking them out on her own and four you are her sole means of transportation.
Having a child with disabilities is hard. Trying not to overprotect her is even harder. It sounds to me like it is time for you to allow her to make more decisions on her own. It is her life. She is the one that has to live with the consequences of her decisions and it is for that reason, she needs to be allowed to make her own decisions. Whether she stays or goes to a different University is her decision to make.
It is time to turn your thinking on its head and make your decisions regarding her based out of seeing her as an adult capable of making her own decisions whether or not they are good for her. I know as a parent it is hard to stand back when a decision is not a good one. At the same time, each bad decision teaches something that she needs to learn for herself.
I use this saying because it helps me to remember what my role is.
"Our job as loving parents is not to prevent our children from experiencing pain and frustration. We couldn't do it anyway, but even if we could, it would not be desirable. Our real task is to help our children gradually build up a tolerance for sadness, anger, and other uncomfortable feelings. It is the mastery over these emotions, not the absence of them that enables children to feel good about themselves."
2007-11-04 09:43:42 · answer #4 · answered by brighterdayscounseling 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay...what's the problem? Are you just being a mean mother? I really don't see any problem there...how are you almost crying because she's moving into a different dorm soon?
2007-11-04 09:06:48 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well it certainly sounds like your daughters doin great in her studies give her some time because i got autism and its hard for me to learn and if you want to do something about her dorm problem just write a letter of complaint to her dean if thats what the name for a american headmaster is sorry if im wrong because im from uk
2007-11-04 09:07:23 · answer #6 · answered by T-Hasan 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you've helped your daughter improve a self-worth so good that she knows of at the same time as she advantages more advantageous in existence. have a good time your self for that! lots of the most important judgements we make in our lives fall into the category of understanding at the same time as to get out of a foul problem. If she fairly sounds like that's a foul problem, help her determination to leave. I left the first college I attended after one semester because it turned right into a foul fit for me. My mum and dad were rightfully in contact that I hadn't given it a lot of a probability, yet I knew easily, it merely changed into the incorrect college for me. at the same time as my mum and dad talked about how a lot happier i changed into on the recent college, they agreed that it changed into the right determination and they were even happy with me for being so formidable as to shrink my losses early when I knew i'd nicely be in a more advantageous position. you've raised her to understand accurate from incorrect and if she's telling you she's no longer chuffed and he or she has a frame of mind to regulate that, the superb aspect you could do is help her make that determination. Then have a good time her bravery for making the replace! you recognize, it is high quality for you to inform her you're scared and ask her in case you could feed off of her bravery for a at the same time as ... it sounds like she's were given adequate braveness to percentage slightly with you in this transition.
2016-10-23 09:50:38 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
So, what's the problem? She's in a good school, and she needs to learn to shut up and get along with roommates.
2007-11-04 09:02:36 · answer #8 · answered by janicajayne 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Same as Katty!
2007-11-04 09:05:06 · answer #9 · answered by ~ Angela ~ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you are afarid of losing control of your daughter. She needs but you NEED her more, you need to let her fly!!!
2007-11-04 09:19:10 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋