HELP! mixed emotions.?

Question

i met this guy, and it seemed like he was REALLY putting effort into getting to know me, it seems like he wants to get to know people really well before he dates them. i respect that, however at this time in my life, i'm trying to focus on college, and the anticipation is distracting me from my work. i finally just came out and asked if he was interested. he said "i don't want to jump into anything, sorry if i led you on, not that i havn't been considering it" it hurt a little, but i digested it and decided that it was early enough that we could still be just friends, however he's making it hard. he keeps being sweet and cuddly with me. before i left that night, he took my hand and said, "thankyou for being honest with me, i'm not saying NO, if you need anything you can talk to me". i trust that he's not out to hurt me, but i'm not sure he knows his own intentions. i spent that whole night adjusting to liking him only as a friend, i think he went home and did the opposite.

he asked me to meet with him today because he wanted to talk about our conversation. i think he might have changed his mind. but now i've just made him a "friend" in my mind. i'm afraid he's going to hurt me by accident what should i do?

Answer 1

Realize what a friend is, your not friends, friends are alot deeper then that. Don't worry its a social problem, not just yours. For one friendship is about UNDERSTANDING the person, which your not, because your in this mess. Two you guys don't communicate honestly about how you feel, or else you wouldn't be talking to us about this. So your acquaintances with history, what did you expect, true love? HAHAHAHAH!!! But your smart, understanding these things well help you wrap your mind around alot of things, wrong with the way we do relationships. Also your right to feel that he doesn't know what he's doing, typically anytime you go for a relationship for love's sake alone, your doomed from the get go, which this guy was sort of doing it for. BUT since you guys had no relationship and therefore didn't understand each other, it didn't go so well..... Really we have a lop-sided ideal of what a relationship is, and how to love in a relationship, and your dealing with those consequences. So don't feel bad, you'd like to talk more about this, e-mail me. If not understand with out a better purpose for the both of you, it doesn't matter, heart-break by default......