Please, I need some help.?

Question

I have reached a point where I don't know what to do. I suffer from lots of mental problems and take 14 different medications daily to maintain balance. Today they don't feel like they are helping. I have never been committed and only have been seen as an out patient.

What I suffer from is PTSD, bipolar disorder, extreme depression, sleep deperation, nightmares, daymares, afraid of the dark, afraid of the light, afraid of being alone, agoraphobia, sleep apnea, anxiety disorder, panic disorder, racing thoughts, short term memory loss, confusion, and lack of consentration.

I feel very tired most of the time. I never think of sucide, I feel that that is a cowards way out and I have never been a coward. I feel like I am swimming upstream in a river of molasses. I know this will pass, but I feel like it never will. I have a lot of support from my wife, daughters, close friends, my group therapy, and my phsyiologist. Today there was no trigger, I feel like I am all alone in the world.

EDIT: Most of the time the meds do the job. All the meds were perscribed by the same doctor. We sat down and discussed the possible side effects and the drug interaction. I went to each drug website and read about them. I also went to webmd. My real problem is when I hit rock bottom. Like today. I am in a terrible funk and it seems like I will never get out of it. I know I will, it maybe tomorrow or in a week or maybe a little longer but it will pass. I want to thank all of you for your caring answers. I was expecting some of the normal wiseass remarks but haven't received any yet. I am trying my best. Your words have been a fantastic help to me.

Answer 1

Hi William!
I think there are plenty of ppl who have been in the same boat. I for one have hit rock bottom a few times thinking that there is no one around to pull me out of the dark hole that I'm in. No one to throw me a rope when I need one. We get into this tunnel thinking and it's so hard to come out of it. We forget what's around the whole picture and only looking thru that dark space, and not the perifial sides where there are ppl standing there wanting to help, but most don't know how. With me, all I did was just ride it through. My husband by my side loving me and listening when I just needed to vent out my feelings. It took a few days but I came out of it. I'm glad you realize you will too. It's just right now is the hardest I know. Not only do you have your family around you William, but you have me here on Y/A that will always listen/read whenever you need to vent. And I'm sure you have other cyber pals that care a great deal about you.
Hang in there my cyber pal. :-) Smile for us as we will for you!

Answer 2

I'm sorry to hear that you're feeling so badly- I also have a laundry list of psych illnesses (including Depression and PTSD), and several chronic physical illnesses as well.

Have you considered, as some have mentioned, your diet and any food allergies, sensitivities, and any recent changes in meds?

Have you thought that maybe you need a physical checkup? All those meds do wear on the liver and kidneys, and might be effecting your thyroid or pituitary glands. Have you had blood tests to make sure none of your meds have built up to toxic levels in your blood?

I would also try taking a multivitamin or two- in case your body is having trouble absorbing nutrients from your foods...

If you can stand being touched- what with the PTSD- massages may help as well.

From the answers you've posted to other's questions, I think you are a great guy- I really wish you the best. Take care.

Answer 3

Hey Bill:

You are so not alone in the world, but you have my heart because I know that sometimes the facts don't match our feelings.

When I get like this, I usually just surrender to it remembering that it always passes. Prayer helps, and then letting go and letting the feelings wash over you or through you. Breathing. Relaxing. Taking a long hot shower or bath. And, hey, I know big men don't cry, but why not break some rules and let all those powerful emotions out?. Release them. Maybe find a safe way to release some anger too. Screaming into a pillow works for me, but you know I am still a little wild child at heart. Find what works for you.

Don't know if any of this stuff will help, but maybe it will help you to remember that I am sending you lots of love and peace, lots of energy, knowing that these feelings really will pass. You have made such an impression on so many of us here in the Y/A community. Hang in there, coach. All shall be well.

Yours,
Indie

Answer 4

One thing you might try is to go to LEF - I will give you a link to that. Put PTSD in the search box and you may find some things there to think about. I wonder also, is this the first and perhaps only doctor that you have consulted with? this might be a great doctor but I would at least try to consult with someone else to get another opinion. Perhaps some of the drugs you are on are making you feel the tiredness. I believe some of the articles at LEF may give you some names of doctors dealing with that as a specialty and perhaps they may be of more help than the doctor you are seeing now unless he deals with the PTSD on a daily basis. Depending upon the group you are in, there are groups which deal strictly with agoraphobics if that is not what your group is. I hope you can get some information and help from the LEF group because I have seen over some 25 years some great things come from there and they may be able to help. Good Luck to you and hang in there. It sounds like you have some great support and that is important!!

Answer 5

Boy, you are really having a hard time.

Are you seeing a therapist?
If so give them a call in the morning.

This is an unusual question but just go with it...

Are any of your medications generic?

I have a dear friend who is Bi-Polar and on Lithium.

She was doing very well for over two years on the brand name medication.

She decided to save some money and switch from the brand name to one of the generics.

She became quite ill. The doctors were stumped.
All her tests, (and there were lots of them) were within the normal range.
She appeared to be healthy but was feeling really bad.

She went to her allergist for a routine visit. and told the doc about what she had been going thru.
The allergist knew she was allergic to all corn products and
one of the fillers in the generic Lithium was corn starch.

Wouldn't you know it.
Her allergies had not been taken into consideration in looking for a diagnosis.

She is now back to normal and living a very good life.
She vowed to never accept a generic drug without consulting her allergist first.

You are taking a lot of medication and it should be monitored closely.
I hope there is only one prescribing doctor!

Please make an appointment with the doctor and take all your medications with you.
I mean the actual medications themselves, not just a list.
Ask him to research it with you.

I wish you all the best.
Having a chemical imbalance is difficult to live with at times.

Please remember if you are in extreme distress call 911.
I would not hesitate.
Better safe than sorry.

Answer 6

You're not alone, there are lots of people with similar problems (not at all trying to belittle your troubles).

Some of those problems sound like side affects of the medication.
How long has it been since you've been without drugs? I know from personal experience that operating on drugs can take away your baseline, you don't know what you'd be like off the drugs and all those drugs (I only take 5) could be counteracting each other or intensifying one another.

If you don't think the drugs are helping, I DON'T recommend stopping them all. You have to be weened off psych meds gradually and one at a time. You have to have support in place in case you crash, so talk to your doctor and see if you could try lowing your meds eventually to zero to get a good baseline and reassess

You may have to be hospitalized while you're figuring out what works, but obviously those 14 meds don't work for you.

I'm happy to hear you're not thinking of suicide, that's at least one thing you have going for you.

Answer 7

What are all the side effects of all of those medications? Could it be that some of them are canceling each other out or reacting with each other to cause still another of your problems? Did all the meds come from the same doctor? If multiple doctors, do they know about each other? Sounds as if the only thing you don't have is suicidal tendencies, but taking all that stuff does sound suicidal to me. Have your thyroid function checked.

Answer 8

Have you ever considered an elimination diet to see if you have food intolerances? Believe it or not, food can be a major cause of most everything you just listed. I'm sure you've heard doctors say that a serotonin imbalance is probably partly responsible, which is why they throw all those pills at you trying to correct the problem....thing is, most of our serotonin is produced in our intestines, NOT in the brain...the pills only target the production in the brain and can actually make things worse for you in some situations. So please consider the food you are eating, you might be surprised at the huge effect it can have if you do happen to have one or more intolerances to something.

Answer 9

Hi Bill. Since it's clinical depression, I understand that it's sometimes hard to simply snap out of it. But please try with much conscious effort to look around you and appreciate the blessings you have like your family and friends. They love you unconditionally and that's the cool part about it, right? Also, think of the people like me who has never met you, but has much admiration for your strength and wisdom. Close your eyes and think of the times when you cheered up people because of the help you were able to give them whether in person or over YA.

I know there is little I can do to help considering that we are only friends over Yahoo Answers, but please know that I am with you in prayer.

Take care and keep us posted. :)

Answer 10

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