A pat on the back is only a few centimeters from a kick in the pants.
Don't be irreplaceable, if you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.
The more crap you put up with, the more crap you are going to get.
You can go anywhere you want if you look serious and carry a clipboard.
Eat one live toad the first thing in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you the rest of the day.
Never ask two questions in a business letter. The reply will discuss the one you are least interested in, and say nothing about the other.
When the bosses talk about improving productivity, they are never talking about themselves.
If at first you don't succeed, try again. Then quit. No use being a damn fool about it.
There will always be beer cans rolling on the floor of your car when the boss asks for a ride home from the office.
Mother said there would be days like this, but she never said there would be so many.
Keep your boss's boss off your boss's back. This is what I'm doing wrong.
Everything can be filed under "miscellaneous."
Never delay the ending of a meeting or the beginning of a cocktail hour.
To err is human, to forgive is not company policy.
Anyone can do any amount of work provided it isn't the work he is supposed to be doing.
Important letters that contain no errors will develop errors in the mail.
The last person that quit or was fired will be the one held responsible for everything that goes wrong - until the next person quits or is fired.
There is never enough time to do it right the first time, but there is always enough time to do it over.
2007-11-04 05:56:03 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
very good funny and *
2007-11-04 07:02:25 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
how about these :- The things that come to those that wait may be the things left by those who got there first. Flashlight: A case for holding dead batteries. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat all day drinking beer and smoking cigars. When you go into court, you are putting yourself in the hands of twelve people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty. The shin bone is a device for finding furniture in the dark. .
2016-04-02 04:29:35 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Funny!
2007-11-04 08:19:15 · answer #3 · answered by cats 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Funny lol
2007-11-04 07:14:51 · answer #4 · answered by ♥Scottish♥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ♥Fairy♥ 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ah this sounds like everyday iv ever had at my work! made me laugh thou! and its oh so true!
2007-11-04 06:02:22 · answer #5 · answered by xXH@nn@Xx 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I've copied this down and i'm bringing it into work.
2007-11-04 07:07:16 · answer #6 · answered by dtedad-50 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
ha ha ha funny
thanks for a laugh
10/10
2007-11-04 06:49:41 · answer #7 · answered by Luck dragon 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
very good, have a star!
2007-11-04 08:11:36 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
haha good ones
2007-11-04 06:36:18 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 2⤋
brillant clever funny how do you know so many....!!!!
2007-11-04 06:02:08 · answer #10 · answered by mal 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋