my dad is a really cold person. He doesn't do anything fun with me. if he wants to play something he'l wait until i ask him, and he'l tell me he'l come back to me when he's not busy, when he really wasn't busy at tht time. When i need his help, he'l show tht he doesn't want to help me, he wants me do it myself. He never hugs/kisses me to show me tht he loves me, and when i try to hug him he'll tell me to stop. Everyone tells me tht it's his personality, his a cold person and i should understand tht.
the last time we had a fight, he made me so angry i had to say i hated him and tht i didn't have a dad, but the thing is when i try to explain to him why im angry he doesn't understand me and whn i said he didn't exist for me anymore, he didn't even care. he doesn't even care right now tht we haven't talked for weeks... he's a jerk and because of him i'm hurt while he's going on with his life probably not even caring tht this is how we're going to live our whole life.
2007-11-04 02:40:29 · 11 answers · asked by lachar1991 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I don't know your dad so I cant give you a straight answer. I can tell you how some character traits are relevant. A lot of people especially men relate, showing emotions as a sign of weakness. Society teaches men a lot of myths. Most men especially older men feel if they show there love & concern for the ones closet to them. that will undermind there strength & control that they use to protect there family.
There isnt a quick fix for this. You just have to have faith that he Loves you. You & him are the only ones that can build your relationship. It sounds as if he is scared to do so. Write him a letter. Tell him how you feel. Let him read it in private, whear there is no threat of someone seeing his emotions.
2007-11-04 02:54:23 · answer #1 · answered by lil bit 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like a bad situation. I assume that you are in your teens because it sounds like you're still under the same roof. I went through a very tough patch with my father when I was younger. I didn't like him at all. It did get better when I got older and was able to understand him. In this situation I would also suggest some form of counseling. I don't believe that most people are cold just to be cold. There is a motivation behind it and I would wager that it probably doesn't have anything to do with you at all but you dad's issue alone. While it's good to get insight from the other parent sometimes it is better to have an impartial party discussing the matter with you.
2007-11-04 03:05:38 · answer #2 · answered by dragonlilly27 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
God! My dad is the SAME WAY!! But you know what? I figured that he just needs some time alone and maybe he's not a really social person. Everyone doesn't always have to talk to everyone, even if they are your dad. But he loves you no matter what he does. He gave birth to you!! And if he didn't love you, he wouldn't raise you since you were a child. Maybe some people just aren't that good at expressing their love. What I did is just stay away from him for a while and sooner or later he'll talk to you himself. Good luck with your dad!
vote me best!!!!
2007-11-04 03:02:53 · answer #3 · answered by Preppy And Cute! 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
not every person is a good parent.it is not your fault it is his problem.the best thing for you to do is spend more time with a positive male role model, like an uncle,or grandfather or cousin or some other trusted male.you can not change your dad only he can and he has no desire to, so just move on and be happy without his company.you can do this and when you are a dad some day just do a better job of it! it is his loss really,he just doesn't know it yet! good luck!
2007-11-04 02:50:56 · answer #4 · answered by dixie58 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I additionally could no longer examine this heavily considering it is repetitious, yet i'd recommend you maintain at your mom to work out somebody to talk to approximately her misery in the previous she does some thing desparate or worse. She's coming up an exceedingly undesirable atmosphere for the entire kin. Her first accountability is to her infants, it extremely is not your (or your brothers) fault that her existence hasn't grew to become out to her liking. She desires to discover help contained in the Lebanese community or church, even a doctor would desire to advise some scientific look after her. It sounds (out of your description), that your dad is extremely fending off the themes that your mom can not look after. one in all them has to make a flow for help because of the fact otherwise, their infants would have one purpose, to get out of that depressing poisonous atmosphere. teenagers shouldn't would desire to stay with what's extremely an risky make sure. you would be able to would desire to be the single to a technique or the different get an person in contact that your mom notably, will hear to.
2016-09-28 07:39:03 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with Jessica; this is a bad situation and one not easily fixed, and certainly not fixable from any of us. You both need to go to professional family counseling to find out why your dad is so cold and lacking in affection. There is obviously something wrong with him, something you don't know about and he may not even be aware of. My father's father was exactly like that; a real iceberg. Never did find out why he was that way, but my father was able to show affection at least and pay us attention.
2007-11-04 02:47:30 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
i no what u meen i hate my dad to we fight alot he is an acholic who never finshed high school he smokes he has no job he beats his cat well i clould go on luckly my mom is a really great parent she sometimes seems to be like how a good dad should be see watchs football and she takes me fishing i could go on about my dad all day but just wanted u to no there is someone who knows what u meen im so sorry if u ever need to talk to someone who care u can email me at 2smart4hisagekid@sbcglobal.net
2007-11-06 10:42:45 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with the family counselling answer. Sounds to me like he just doesn't know how to communicate, so when he doesn't know how to respond he just ignores the situation. I'm sure he does care that you said you hated him but doesn't know how to talk to you about it. Tell him how you feel and hopefully he will actually listen and do something about this situation.
2007-11-04 03:02:21 · answer #8 · answered by Bears Mom 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe your father wasnt showed love (cuddling etc.) as a child, this is not his fault nor your fault, this was the way some children were reared in the day, never mothered, do you know your fathers childhood? Maybe ask ,it may have alot to do with it.
2007-11-04 02:58:32 · answer #9 · answered by she 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you still live with your mum, ask if anything bad has happened to him in your life, don't feel upset , i expect he doesn't know what he's missing, it's not your problem its his and he has to sort it out, maybe your mum or a close friend can talk to him and tell him how much he is hurting you
2007-11-04 02:51:23 · answer #10 · answered by Harry B 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋