my older sister hasn't dated any1 in 3 years and she cant get over her ex boyfriend. shes in college and lives right near our house. wat can i do 2 help her get back out there and get a new boyfriend? can i do anything? shes really sad and i want 2 help!
2007-11-04 00:55:37 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
First, you need to start taking your sister out to places where there are other people her own age. Places like on campus coffee shops or "hang outs". Do girl things, like shopping, etc. Once she is out and around others more, in a relaxed atmosphere, she may realize what she has been missing out on and be more open to meeting new guys.
How sweet of you to care about her. I wish you good luck in your mission!
2007-11-04 01:01:02 · answer #1 · answered by Debi 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is possible that she is not simply having a hard time getting over this ex-boyfriend, but that she is clinically depressed. It might help to encourage her to talk to her doctor about it, or for her to take advantage of the mental health services at her college. Many times, depression is not just from some heart-breaking event, but from a chemical imbalance in the brain. That's why medication helps so many people overcome depression. But also, medication is not the only way to help someone with depression, and that's where talking with a counselor will help.
As for what else you can do, there have already been some great suggestions - make plans with your sister to go out and do some fun things. Or even just go for nature walks in a nearby park. Or maybe find some craft the two of you can do together. Or maybe there is a sport you can join a league together - which would help by not only being a fun, healthy exercise, but also help your sister to meet new friends.
Just about getting over the ex-boyfriend - well, that takes as long as it takes. Each time is different. One of my relationships, I was so hurt, I didn't really get over him for a good 7 years. But then again, I did date in that time. Well, some first dates, but not many guys I wanted to see again. I knew I not only had to grieve over the loss of that relationship, but also I had to learn more about myself and how I could have a happier, healthier relationship. So I worked on creating a good life for myself without having to be in a relationship. I wasn't depressed, at least not for all those seven years. I changed careers, moved to a different part of the country, took up new hobbies - all in all, I was not standing still in my life - I was having adventures. Maybe your sister needs this time to learn how to be on her own without a relationship. But she shouldn't be so sad for so long, maybe.
2007-11-04 08:28:06 · answer #2 · answered by Windi Lea 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe that she has to realize it herself. She has to get out and meet new people. I didn't date for almost 3 years because I was tired of guys cheating on me.
There is hope. Volunteering with your sister would be good. It puts a smile on their faces and lifts your spirits up by helping others.
I know that I did not want someone who really didn't want me. I have set my standards as to men. You cheat on me once, NO second chances. Out the door they go.
You want to date other women, tell me and break it off with me. I respect honesty more than going behind my back. It hurts more to find out another way than for the guy to be straight up and honest.
There will be a man who will sweep her off her feet, but in order for that to happen, she has to let her old boyfriend go. Hanging on to the old stale stuff fills you up so that there is no more room for growth.
Have some sort of thing that will help her let go. Write his name down and write a letter of good bye to him and how she felt about him and burn it together.
It is hard to let go when you wanted something so badly. It is better to let go so growth can continue. It won't make things go back to where they were by hanging on. Trust God and have faith that there is someone else out there.
You can let her read what you have asked and what we have written. God Bless both of you. Hugs to both.
2007-11-04 08:04:30 · answer #3 · answered by Stephanie F 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If she is in college she must come into contact with guys. Perhaps she's not ready, or she doesn't want to get hurt again.
Have a talk with her and ask her what's up. Can't the two of you go out together? Good luck.
2007-11-04 08:00:39 · answer #4 · answered by Veritas 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you should talk to her about this situation. tell her if she continues to feel for her ex, she will still be sad. talk to him and maybe they can be close friends if she would enjoy that.
then if she is in a good mood after the talk, take her to a bar, a club, or anywhere. set her up for a date maybe.
best of luck !
2007-11-04 08:01:10 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
speed dating or set her up on a date if they dont work well at least she didnt poure her heart out again, and an old saying gos an un aimed arrow never misses yet an aimed one may
2007-11-04 08:00:05 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Go places with her where she can meet a new prince
2007-11-04 08:00:34 · answer #7 · answered by baltus 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take her out,spend time,don't talk of past flames.
2007-11-04 07:59:33 · answer #8 · answered by strandlock 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Arrange an outing with her. Make it somewhere she can't resist.
2007-11-04 07:59:07 · answer #9 · answered by holly 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Convince her to go to counseling.
2007-11-04 07:58:56 · answer #10 · answered by yngprofmn 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋