He said that I can't put it up this year because he thinks our son will pull it over. I think that if we pay close enough attention it should be fine. I don't want to fight about it, but I do think that we should have a tree, especially with a little boy..my sister already has hers up and he loves it! I'm just aggravated because when I mention lights or anything about our tree to someone he says, "I already said we're not putting the tree up this year" like I have no say whatsoever. Should I just put it up anyway?
2007-11-03 17:17:52 · 23 answers · asked by ... 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
I put one up in my daughter's playpen - so she was lose & the tree was safe
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2007-11-03 23:39:06 · answer #1 · answered by Rai A 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
We have two boys and have NEVER NOT put up a Christmas tree. Of course, when the kids were about 13 months old, all the ornaments made it to the top half of the tree because of the constant grabbing at them. You could get a fence that you usually put around the fireplace (made to keep the kids out of the fireplace) around the tree to keep your child from it too...or make some other barrier. It would be sad if your son didn't get to partake in putting up a Christmas tree just because your husband has a fear about something which CAN be prevented. You just need to take precautions to prevent it.
What I would do is talk to him about how you FEEL. Start the sentences out with "I FEEL...." because it explains what YOU are feeling verses just attacking him for his fear of his son getting hurt. At the end ask him if he would compromise with you about the tree. I wouldn't just go and put the tree up without talking to him first, because that would just p*ss him off and make him prejudiced against the tree and maybe Christmas all together.
2007-11-04 00:39:06 · answer #2 · answered by Fedup Veteran 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As many people have mentioned, you should really talk this over with your husband. Just doing things behind eachother's backs or commanding eachother to do things is never a good idea. You could present some of alternative ideas to him (since I kinda agree your child might hurt himself if he pulls over a full sized tree). Macaw's Wing has some good ideas. Also you could place a small tree on a high table. If he still wont even listen, well get some help from a doctor because then he is just being an ***.
2007-11-04 00:40:04 · answer #3 · answered by Heather R 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
This is a relationship question. That being aid - do what my wife does.
I want a tree. We are having a tree. Deal with it. Still want to debate it then okay - Gosh honey when I think of not having a tree, I get so upset I don't feel like having sex anymore; at least until we have a tree up. Sometimes I disgree with her just to get the ultimatum and then back off. Its playing with fire but the reward is there.
How long you two been married that you don't know this tactic?
2007-11-04 00:34:27 · answer #4 · answered by davster 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Get a wreath.
If you want get a kid-safe tree or better yet, plant a small tree in the back yard. Dress it up in a very understated way a day or two beforehand and celebrate the season.
Your husband is just being practical and safety minded, that's completely understandable, as little kids can get into alot of trouble , especially if their time is not more or less completely structured.
2007-11-04 00:23:34 · answer #5 · answered by Mark T 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It isn't worth fighting over. If your husband agrees maybe a small tree on a table top the child can't reach with nothing heavy to hurt him if he does get it down. Put it up Christmas Eve and take it down Christmas day but only if your husband agrees. Pick your battles.
2007-11-04 00:24:46 · answer #6 · answered by shipwreck 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Buy a 3' or 4' tree and set it up where the baby can't reach it. You can pick one up at the local dollar store for 20 or so dollars.
Diane- lol that is so funny my daughter did something very similar when she was about 2. only she knocked it over onto her older brother and tried to cover both up with a baby blanket so we wouldn't know.
2007-11-04 00:32:16 · answer #7 · answered by echos_passion 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you want the Christmas tree up, put it up. You do have a say, unless you give up your right to have a say. 13 months is old enough to tell the child to leave it alone. And, like you said, you can keep an eye on your son to make sure he doesn't pull it over.
Good idea about the playpen Diane!
2007-11-04 00:27:24 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
How about an "outdoor" christmas tree with peanut-butter covered pine cones hung up on a spare bush in your yard....do you have a yard?
How about a giant poster-paper stuck to the wall and colored with a tree with paper stick-on ornaments?
My brother went into the bush and cut some spruce branches and made a spiffy hanging ornament with a bunch of branches and lights (up high out of reach), or just throw them on the mantle (do you have a mantle?)
2007-11-04 00:25:09 · answer #9 · answered by Somewhat Enlightened, the Parrot of Truth 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You and your husband should seek counseling... Both his and your attitudes can lead to far worse problems in your marriage than whether or not to put up a tree...
When my kids were little I placed the tree in a playpen to keep the kids from toppling it over, when decorating place only non breakable ornaments near the bottom...
There are also products called Play Gates..http://www.target.com/Superyard-Play-North-States-Industries/dp/B00020L78M/sr=1-2/qid=1194150207/ref=sr_1_2/601-2360240-4886538?ie=UTF8&rh=k%3Achild%20play%20yard&page=1
They are designed to keep the kids in but there's no reason you can keep the tree in it and keep the kid out...
My kids are now ages 20, 18 and 10 one of our favorite holiday memories is the year my son (age 3) toppled the tree over on top of himself... All you could see was arms and legs sticking out the sides as he called for help... We did help him but not before grabbing the camera off the mantle to document the occassion..
2007-11-04 00:26:25 · answer #10 · answered by Diane (PFLAG) 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
His concern is understood but he is not being understanding of his wife's needs. Assure him that millions of people have done Christmas with a tree and 13 month old babies. Then have him help you put it up and watch the excitement he will not regret it.
2007-11-04 00:27:47 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋