Do you think he misses me? He is in his 40's?

Question

I am in my late 20's. I dated a man in his early mid-40's, b ut it ended almost a year ago for many reason.....

A couple months later, we started contacting eachother again...texts, emails, and phone calls. This went on for a while. We never got together, we only talked.

Then that fizzled b/c he wanted to try and date again. I refused to do that, mainly because he always blamed me 100% for the last breakup. I admit, I was part to blame......but so was he! He was a real jerk towards the end. Had he admitted to me that he was a jerk, I may have gone out with him again. But nope, it was allll my fault.
If we got back together, I want to be able to communicate with him (or any partner). I try to communicate with him and he completely disregards my feelings about so many things.

So now that I told him that I DON'T want to get back with him, and my reasons why....he is completely ignoring me. The silent treatment. What is up with that at hos age? Has he completely moved on?

Answer 1

Well, he has given up. And he is old enough to know that it makes no sense to court a woman who isn't going to want what he wants (sex, relationship, etc.)

Older men do tend to disregard the opinions and feelings of younger women (I mean when there is such a big age difference). He feels he is older and wiser.

My opinion is that you are wiser than he is, because you were mature enough to attract an older man and smart enough to know he wasn't right for you.

He sounds like kind of a moron for acting that way, and for wanting to be with such a young woman in the first place.

Answer 2

I think you are getting answers from very young people. I will be 60 in a few months and I think the guy is pouting. He is trying to get things his way and you shouldn't let it happen.

Tell him he can't have his Kate and Edith too. Also tell him to grow-up before he ever calls again then don't interrupt your life because he does call. Make your decisions about dating him at that point in time.

Oh yeah, in the mean time move on with your life. It may not be easy but give it a try.

Answer 3

Um, ok.

You told him you didn't want to get back with him. So, what did you expect him to do? Call you later and set a lunch date? Maybe it is his age; the fact that he has the maturity to recognize he did some dumb things, it's not going to work and the best thing to do is to move on. Finding what he wants with another woman will not be possible with you lingering around.

You can't have it both ways; you can't tell someone you don't want to be involved with them then get hurt because they're "ignoring you."

It didn't work, it's over. Done. Find someone who has the qualities you want and leave this guy alone.

Answer 4

I feel as though you have answered your own question. This person does not seem as interested in you as he would be if he really cared. There are many other men out there alot of whom would be very interested in an actual relationship. My opinion is that the past relationship has sailed and you should let it go. Sometimes that is hard to do but from what you write it is time. Good Luck.

Answer 5

Apparently the guy has a "thing" about admitting that anything can be his fault, or that he can be wrong in any way. You hit a nerve so rather than admit anything, he'd rather lose you. Sounds like he's got problems so you're better off without him. And BTW, I'm sure he misses you, but he'll probably never admit that either!

Answer 6

Presumably he still misses you...and though love can certainly mess you up even at the more "mature" age of 40 i'd say his behaviour is such that you're better off moving along. it seems he wants something else than a relationship from you - otherwise of course he'd pick up the loose ends...so good luck in your new life!

Answer 7

You told him you didn't want to get back together with him. He heard you and he's moved on. Why are you so worried about it? You said he was an *** to you, so what's the problem? Sounds as though this is what you wanted. Or, are you just the type of girl that feels the need to have men needlessly fawning over you?

Answer 8

I don't think he has moved on. Right now he is hurting because you revealed the truth about the breakup of your relationship. Either he is very stubborn by not accepting part of the fault, or he thinks he can hurt you the way he is hurting. Who knows how long it will take him to get over this? But you should continue to carry on with your life.

Answer 9

The fact that both of you still stuck in that emotional tug of war since the break up, should be a warning sign not to get back together. Age is not relevant, emotinal maturity is the key.

Answer 10

If he disregards your feelings, you don't need to be with that person. Lots of people are immature regardless of age. You told him you don't want to get back together..so I say lose his number and email and move on.