My resignation was badly received by my manager. What can I do next?

Question

My manager was furious with me when I handed her my polite resignation letter. She was aware of my job application to another company, and I had asked her permission prior to putting her name forward as a referee(which she agreed to do). Her anger was directed towards the fact that some of my colleagues were aware of my interview success before her. However, I made an appointment to see her on the same day that I received my formal job offer, so feel I could not have acted any quicker. She would not take my letter from me, and did not acknowledge my hard work over previous 4 years. Am I right to feel aggrieved, or should I let this go? I'm considering contacting the Human Resources dept to complain about her behaviour, but do not want to act 'over the top'. Any advice please? Thankyou.

Answer 1

You have to remember that your manager is taking it personally because she knows what a good employee you are. It isn't a question of if your shoes can be filled, but how many people it will take to fill yours.

The drudgery of interviewing, hiring, training are all mixing in with REJECTION.

I a few days (or not), she will get over it (or not). The best thing to do is move on without rubbing salt in the wounds.


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I worked for a company where everybody was "family" until you left. After that, if you saw a former boss or supervisor in public (not at trade shows or anything), it was usually icy-dagger stares and very stiff conversation.

Some people just react that way.

Answer 2

Ignore impulsive advice for a start.

You've handed in your resignation, that she wouldn't take it is very unprofessional of her, and technically she can't refuse to accept your resignation. Send a copy of the letter to HR department.

That she doesn't acknowledge the hard work you've done over the last 4 years is probably one of the reasons you're leaving. Leaving for higher wages is only one reason why people leave a job, and oddly enough not the most important one usually. Leave on good terms.

Work your notice through and extend the olive branch by inviting her to your leaving do. If things at the new job don't work out well, you can go back without difficulties, or get future references without problems.

She is probably feeling let down and a bit betrayed that everyone knew before she did. Besides apart from a bit of petty revenge what gain is there by complaining about her behaviour ? Treat her how you would like to have been treated had situations been reversed.

If at the end of all this she still acts like a spoilt child who is the one who walks away with head held high and with dignity ?????

Answer 3

This manager is a problem! Hand in your resignation letter to HER manager, if there is one, otherwise to human resources. You do need to make sure you have given official notice that you are leaving. But do not have any anger or bad feelings, just be businesslike and be sure to thank everybody for how wonderful they have been to work with. After all, YOU are the winner here, and this company is the loser, you must be gracious.
Do not feel aggrieved, let it go.
You will need this company for a reference. It would be a good idea to summarize all the great things you have done for this company, especially if you helped them make money. Include this list in a second letter of "thanks for the opportunity" to someone you know in HR.
Congratulations!

Answer 4

I wouldn't put too much thought into it because you're heading to a new job anyways. I'd ask to sit down with her and basically explain that you don't want to leave on bad terms, that you've had a good run, put in a lot of hard work, and that you appreciate everything she's done. I think often managers/supervisors feel a little betrayed or let down when someone that's worked for them for a very long time leaves. Let her know that that's not the case. I did that with my previous job and it made things flow MUCH smoother.

Answer 5

Oh boy. I think as long as you give her two weeks notice, she has no reason to be so upset. She is obviously taking this personally, when it is just business. I wouldn't contact HR over it just yet, unless she does something to stop you from leaving (which she can't). The only thing you have to worry about is that you listed her as a reference. But since you already have the job offer, I don't think she can hurt you. She'll get over it and everything will be fine.

Good luck in your new job!

Answer 6

Her reaction was not valid. You have every right to feel the way you do and if you feel like it will make a difference then go right ahead and complain. Don't worry about burning any bridges because she might ruin your good name just because you want to make your life better. It is hard to let things go but you need closure on this.

Answer 7

You will be working all your life and remember it is your life, you have to work to live not live to work, hard luck if the resignation was not received well you look after yourself when it comes to employment, remember companies can dispense with your services at the drop of a hat without any feelings if they want to.

Answer 8

She sounds really immature about your resignation. Go ahead and contact human resources. she should have just thanked you for your time and moved on. Perhaps theres someone else that can handle a referral. Because she was biter about your departure she might ruin it for you with future referrals. I guess I wouldn't trust her. You could also write her a private letter and express your concerns and feelings over her behavoir. Its hard to loose a good employee but she was really unprofessional .

Answer 9

I think you do need to sort this out, otherwise there could be problems with your reference.

I would ask for another meeting with her before taking it to HR if you are not satisfied.

Most firms give an "exit interview" just before you go and that would be an appropriate time to bring this up as well

Answer 10

If you took the proper steps in giving your resignation then her being mad is not your problem.. she didn't become a manager right out of the gate so she of anyone should realize the means to want to get ahead and succeed, i feel she is mad because she is losing a good worker...