Do you believe that if you holding onto "unforgiveness" right now, you are lost?

Question

"Then his lord, after that he had called him, said unto him, O thou wicked servant, I forgave thee all that debt, because thou desiredst me:
Shouldest not thou also have had compassion on thy fellowservant, even as I had pity on thee?
And his lord was wroth, and delivered him to the tormentors, till he should pay all that was due unto him.
So likewise shall my heavenly Father do also unto you, if ye from your hearts forgive not every one his brother their trespasses." Matthew 18:32-35

Answer 1

You mean the robbers who just raped my wife and are pointing a gun at me can rob me of my salvation as well as my money?

Sorry brother Don, but I 'm not sure that is fair! I guess you are not a "once saved always saved" Baptist.

Don't they have to ask for forgiveness before I am obligated to such a perilous extent?

I know we are commanded to forgive, even our enemies, and unforgveness hurts US more than them; but your bible verse says "your brother". If they are serving the devil, are we "brothers"?

Matthew does not teach that our eternal destiny is based on us forgiving other people; however, it does teach that our relationship with God will be damaged if we refuse to pardon those who have offended us.

The Bible is clear that God pardons sin by His grace based on Christ’s work on the cross alone, not on man’s actions.

Our right standing before Him is established on one thing only: the finished work of Christ (John 3:16; 1 John 2:2; 1 John 4:10).

The penalty for sin that is rightly ours is paid by Christ, and we obtain it by grace through faith, not by any righteous deeds of our own (Ephesians 2:8-9).

No one will be able to stand before God demanding that their sins be forgotten simply because they have forgiven others.

Only when we are born again, given a new life through God’s Spirit, by faith in Jesus Christ are our sins forgiven.

Therefore, Jesus is not referring to God’s initial act of forgiveness (reconciliation) that we experienced when we first believed the Gospel.

What He is referring to is the day-to-day cleansing we obtain when we confess our sins in order to restore fellowship with our heavenly Father, which is interrupted by the daily tarnishing of sin that affects us all.

This is not the wholesale cleansing from sin that comes with salvation by grace through faith!

It is more like the foot-washing Jesus describes in John 13:10. The “whole body is clean,” He told the disciples, but their feet were dirty from their walking in the world!

So the moral of this story is "Don't pray to God with DIRTY hands!!!"

Answer 2

Not "lost". You are only lost if you reject the Lordship of Jesus Christ. But Jesus does speak of those who will be saved "as a branch saved from burning." Holding on to unforgiveness creates a lot of problems for the person doing the holding-on, while it doesn't hurt the unforgiven person (often they don't even know about it, and many wouldn't care if they did know). While you have a "right" to your anger and resentment, it isn't healthy to hold onto the cause. You can literally make yourself ill--ulcers, obsessions, and even some forms of inflammatory illness can start with resentment-induced stress.

If you are a believing Christian, go to the Lord's Prayer passages and read what it says: Jesus forgives us *as we forgive those who sin against us.* So if you don't, He can't forgive you. Scary. Best to keep short accounts with God and man.

And BTW: I'm not saying forgiving is "pretending it never happened." As a victim of systematic sexual and physical abuse, I know better than that. Forgiveness is not an emotion, it doesn't necessarily "make it all better." Sexual predators, for one, must not be led to think that what they do is "OK" or that they can do it again. Forgiveness is a decision, an act of will. But wisdom would dictate in this sort of situation distancing oneself from the abuser etc. and avoiding their company in future.

Answer 3

By “lost,” if you mean losing salvation, no. But Christians could go under oppression/ into bondage if they do not forgive. By God's spiritual principle as in Matthew 18:32-35, tormentors will have the legal right to torment an unforgiving believer until he forgives.

Answer 4

If your god is so forgiving explain phrases such as
suffer not a witch to live...or

"I the LORD thy God am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children unto the third and fourth generation..." -- Exodus 20:5

Answer 5

As an atheist I do not believe in being either "saved" or "lost", but I do believe unforgiveness is bad for us. By holding grudges we let those who have wronged us do double harm. I am of the opinion that doing someone wrong is more harmful to the person who does the wrong, than the person who is wronged.

Answer 6

Don, it's hard to forgive when you've been hurt so deeply and deceived by a friend.
I had a friend whom I called sister who wrote letters to all of my Christian friends telling lies about me. Thankfully a real friend brought this to my attention. I can't express enough how this felt.
She got word that I knew and left a message on my phone that she was playing a joke on her dear sister. Me.

How can one forgive so quickly the harm that has been done to you especially when you don't feel the forgiveness in your heart?
I have been praying about this. I think that if the Lord came today I would go up with HIM because HE knows I'm trying to overcome what has been done and willing to forgive when my heart/mind let's me.

Answer 7

Our relationship with God will be damaged if we refuse to pardon those who have offended us. The Bible is clear that God pardons sin by His grace based on Christ’s work on the cross alone, not on man’s actions. Our right standing before Him is established on one thing only: the finished work of Christ (John 3:16; 1 John 2:2; 1 John 4:10). The penalty for sin that is rightly ours is paid by Christ, and we obtain it by grace through faith, not by any righteous deeds of our own (Ephesians 2:8-9). No one will be able to stand before God demanding that their sins be forgotten simply because they have forgiven others. Only when we are born again, given a new life through God’s Spirit, by faith in Jesus Christ are our sins forgiven.

Answer 8

Lost no.. But by having unforgiveness in your heart it will affect many areas in your life. The one that is forefront on my mind is that it will affect the power of my prayer life. If you cannot forgive don't expect to be forgiven in the same areas. Yes Christ forgives us from all our sins. But unforgiveness in your heart is a open door for Satan to come in.

Answer 9

I do not believe that unforgiveness precludes anyone from salvation, but I do believe that it is not expedient.. I believe that the word "tormentors" in verse 34 does not refer to hellfire, but to demons. I believe that refusal to forgive gives demons the ability to take us in a strangle hold.

Furthermore, does our unforgivenss actually hurt the person who we failed to forgive? Or does it only hurt us? I have heard it said that unforgiveness is a poison we take ourselves while trying to kill somebody else.

Answer 10

You can forgive those who are making a concerted effort to change or have changed. But you need to warn all potential victims, of these negative dangerous people, so that they won't be put in harms way. You get the negative things that you tolerate, in your life. We have a lot of abuse in this world, and this problem needs to be better addressed. We tolerate too much immorality. I think victims have the right to have time to heal, and get over the emotional damage inflicted on them. I want every one to pray/meditate, do mind-body exercises, eat healthy and not over indulge, so they will be strong spiritually, to do battle with the problem of abuse in this world.