Is it wrong to stand as a child's godfather at a christening if you are unsure of your beliefs?

Question

I've been asked to stand for my baby cousin, to become her godfather. Our extended family is typically Roman Catholic although not everyone practises it. What I want to know is, is it morally wrong for me to accept to look after my cousin and her faith, and pledge allegience to a God I'm not sure I believe in, even if I will do my upmost to look after her as long as I am breathing?

Answer 1

You are getting up in front of God and everybody to pledge that you will do your best to see that she will be brought up in the Catholic Faith....NOT that she is brought up with a comfortable standard of living.

You aren't promising to bring her dollies and buy her Christmas Presents. You want to do that, great, but that's not what you are promising to do. You are promising that you will make sure she gets taught the basics of the faith and receives a good CATHOLIC upbringing.

Now this is important two ways.

1) Apparently a large chunk of your family doesn't take the faith very seriously. If you are going to keep the promise you are making and fulfill your duties as a godparent, you might have to get crosswise with them at some time... if you are going to keep your promise there may be a day when you say something like "Jen, I know you this is sort of a personal thing to say... but I'm little Kristen's Godfather and I swore that I would do my best to get her a good Catholic upbringing... and I know that you and Bill haven't been going to Church lately, and I'd consider it a great personal favor if you could make an effort to get Kristen to Church more often. I know this is kind of awkward, but I made a promise and I take my promises seriously."

If you aren't willing to do what it takes to keep your promise, then don't promise to do it.

2) You are promising to make sure that your baby cousin gets a good Catholic upbringing... you are not promising to be a good Catholic yourself. There are lots of cases in interfaith marriages where one spouce is not Catholic, but they promise to raise the kids Catholic, and they do so. The duty you accept is to see that your cousin gets a good religious education... what you do is up to you.

BTW I am VERY impressed at how seriously you are taking this. Most people just blow this sort of thing off. It speaks well of you that you take your duties seriously, and actually think about things like this.

Answer 2

Yes, it's wrong; because if you aren't a strong believer, it's hypocrisy to be a godparent. You will be contributing to her god-delusion -- to all intents and purposes, you will be lying to your cousin. And that's not doing her any favours.

If she turns away from the Church in later life, she will resent you for trying to force her into it; particularly as you did so against your own better judgement.

On the other hand, if she remains a devout Roman Catholic, she wull come to resent you for promising to bring her up in the ways of the Church which you yourself doubted.

You need to talk to your sister and B.I.L. Seeing as not everyone in the family is a practising Catholic, why don't you opt to have a Secular Naming Ceremony instead, and be her "guidefather" -- making a ceremonial pledge to look after her, but only in non-religious senses?

There are too many people IMHO who pretend to believe in god for the sake of pleasing others. I say it's better to be honest with yourself. There's nothing wrong with being an agnostic or an atheist.

Answer 3

Godfather has nothing to do with religion.

Godfather is a position that is more ceremonial in context.

If you accept the Catholic concept of "godfather" and you don't believe in that concept, then you should decline.

Answer 4

If you don't believe in God, you aren't harming anything. What they don't know won't hurt them ;).

Answer 5

You are definitely the one.