please please please?

Question

will someone read this. you would be doing me a HUGE favor.
i know its long.


Like I said, we never seem to get a break. As soon as all the
stuff was over with Floyd and I thought my life was getting back
to normal, a police officer drove up to my house and knocked on
the door, my mom and dad answered it. I could catch little bits
and pieces of what they were saying, I heard "cutting them out"
and something about a hospital, that couldnt be good. my mom
came back into the kitchen, by this time she was hysterical, and
my dad I could tell he wanted to cry. I became numb, thinking if I
didnt cry then maybe it wasnt happening, and I could ignore it, it
seemed to work. I tried to console my parents telling them that
there was a good chance they were still alive. Do you know how
hard it is for a 15 year old to comfert her parents? something i
never wanna ever again. They called my grandparents, they
were over in nothing flat rushing off the two different hospitals,
they had to put my brother in one and my sister in another. I had
to stay up late that night, to check samantha [my diabetic little
sister] at 2 am. I sat on the couch not completely grasping the
situtation, I dont know if its just because i didnt want to, or i
didnt understand.
My brother and sister were in the hospital for a week, and
during that time, I had to play mom. I cooked, I cleaned, wathed
kids [i have 9 siblings] and gave samantha her shots. Even
though I hadnt done it before, i turned into an exact copy of my
mother, forgetting completely i was a teenager. My friends
would call, and i just about cry when i had to turn them down, i
was so sick of playing "mom" i just wanted my life back, to be a
teenager again, but i kept those feelings inside, put on a "mask"
and acted as if everything was alright. School, and even church
that week was hard. Having to repeat the story over and over,
the knot in my throat growing larger with each telling, but still i
didnt cry, i couldnt.
Over the week i decided that was it, this was too much for me,
and finally went to talk to someone, my school counselor. For a
week I went, telling him everything, pouring out my soul, but
still no real tears, the ones i did cry were fake and forced. But
isnt that what your supposed to do during a time like this, cry? I
pushed everything that had happened in the past week, two
weeks, and even month into the back of my mind. And now when
it seemed to all be pileing up on me there seemed to be no way
to release it. and i sank further and further into depression.
I became numb, a zombie walking through the halls at school.
I wanted nothing to do with anything or anyone there. I was
completely withdrawn, thinking to myself, i dont even remember
about what. I'd get home and go right up to my room to sleep.
The mornings though, were worse it was a battle to get myself
out of bed in the morning. I would tell me counselor about
everything, but that got me no where. He basically told mr that I
was on my own and that i had caused myself to feel so upset.
I dont know anymore, I've talked the counselors ear off and
i talked his ear off, i've told him about this. but i dont think that I 've
evr even
delt with it, just ignored it. It seems silly though, , this
happened two weeks ago why bring it up now? its in the past. I
really think that im just wasting his time, and that he thinks im
im in this all for attention. but believe me thats not what its
about.

its not a question, i just need help. what do i do?

Answer 1

Lord love you child.It can never be in the past until you deal with it.as for the counselor seek help elsewhere be it in the church with a pastor,priest or a friend or family member.

Answer 2

Yours is a case not a question. However, I can see that you're very depress with the issues going on with your family. It's hard to deal with especially you're a teenage and born in this century. Nowadays kids are pretty much spoiled. All I can say think "Positive" you have more valuable experience then kids of your same age. You'll be a much stronger person after you've been through all this. I'm not sure if you have any religious. We have a saying that "Give is better than recieve." You're more blessed than any other kid. My mom was borned during the second world war, believe me it much much harder than you're experiencing right now. She was only eight and she had to take care all of her sibblings and her mom, my grandpa was in jail (due to political reasons). She didn't go to school properly like you, she had to always skip a level, for instance after 3rd grade, she'll probably went to 5 grade (they had to move around during the war). It turned out that all my uncles and aunt respect her very much. She become very successful in her career. She told me all her experiences help her to be a better person. She's much stronger and determine and never give up, she can handle difficulties better than any other person. So think positive, you'll probably have a better future than any other people here. Good luck.

Answer 3

Sweetheart, it is only natural for you to resent the enormous weight suddenly put upon your young shoulders and that counselor should be horse whipped for dismissing your feelings, he does not deserve his job. As for not crying real tears, that too can be perfectly normal, we all deal with tragedy in different ways, some cry, others take charge and do what they can NOT to think of it. You sound like a very Strong young lady who faced this with courage few your age can muster. I pray your brother and sister recover and also pray you soon are able to weep out your own trapped fears and get back to being a teenager again. God Bless You All Honey.

(If you ever need to just talk, IM me, okay? You might be surprised just how much I'll understand. Take care.)

Answer 4

I read your story and it sounds like you've gone through a lot. I think that a good start to getting over this would be to write it all down in a journal. Write every little detail. You don't have to cry. if you don't need to cry then there is no reason for you to. Another thing that would help is to do something uplifting; get out of your house for a while and hang out with your friends. Always keep in mind that you survived that week or so and you'll be OK. Good luck.

Answer 5

Firstly, see someone else. For your counselor to say you brought it all on yourself when you've had a family tragedy, all that extra responsibility, and the depression on top of it all, is just callous in the extreme.
You have a lot on your plate and do now need help to get through this. Talk to your parents, they need to know that you are struggling. They are the ones who should organise the extra help, especially with such a large family to cope with. I'm from a big one too (8 kids), so I know what its like. Why not turn to your church? You said you go. Ask them for assistance in this time. Thay should be their for their community.
But above all, know that you did the right thing. You stepped up and helped your family, and you are deserving of some help too.
Take care of you.

Answer 6

I think you need a professional counselor besides the school councilor to deal with all of this. You are totally over whelmed.And rightly so, but so are your parents and siblings.Your whole family needs help right now.Maybe other family members could help out with the other children or church members or neighbors.I would be very scared of someone treating a diabetic child at the age of 15 who is not familiar with the disease and the dosages of the shots etc. very dangerous.Where are your aunts,uncles,grandparents,etc? May God bless your family.

Answer 7

I don't want to be rude but .. what is your question ? this is Yahoo Q and A and normally people ask a question and hope to get a good answer but all I see here is you telling everyone your about your life .. Im sorry things happended to you that upset you , things happen to everyone , thats part of life and even though we can't understand it thats just the way it is .. Im sure there are lots of people on here who have worse things happen to them .. and if anyone can figure out what it was you were talking about please let me in on it .. remember that when you write something your dealing with people who dont know you and can't read your mind so you have to explain it to us not to assume we can read your mind . Everyone needs to have someone to talk to and you can't keep everything inside because if you do you will explode but you cant keep going on and on about the same thing or people will run from you because they don't want to hear it any more ..so what ever it is thats bugging you so much .. deal with it and remember that its in the past and get on with your life ...
good luck .. sorry to be so blunt but I think you need to stop whinning and let the sunshine in .....
oh and surfer girl ... putting your email address here is just really not a good plan .. you just invited all the spammers and idiots out there to your mail box ....

Answer 8

I've had similar experiences in my life, and the following got me through it. Know this, God made you stronger then anything that can happen to you in your life. What is the purpose of life? It is preparation for eternity.....life here is a series of experiences, many of which are problems.....problem's latin root means "to throw forth" as if they were designed for you to help you &/or others grow....either you are in some now or just got out of some or about to head into some. God is more interested in your character then your comfort......more interested in making you holy then happy, even though happiness can be experienced throughout if you stay focused on your purpose.....more interested in what you become as a person, he didn't put you here to fulfill a "to-do" list. How do you come to know, love and serve God, but by knowing, loving and serving his people. And always remember: in happy moments, praise God; in difficult moments, seek God; in quiet moments, worship God; in painful moments, trust God; and in every moment, thank God. Pray, and I will pray for you. And seek the help of someone your heart tells you might be able to listen and help you, it could be a teacher, a friend, a friend's parent, of course clergy.

Answer 9

Actually, I do think that ur in this for attention. Also, what was the question? Did u just want to be heard? of course there's no problem with that, and I'm sorry to hear what happened. But at least u tried to be strong about it and helped ur sisters and siblings and parents out.
And ur right, u don't have to bring it all up again if it happened 2 weeks ago. Just let it be. I guess u just wanted to get all of this off of ur chest, and that's ok, but really what was the question? =|

Good Luck in the future.

Answer 10

OMgosh! Is this real? You poor thing! You have every right to be depressed. That counselor should be fired for making you feel like you are just in it for the attention. What kind of an incompetent professional and hard hearted person is he/she? Geez, I hope your brother and sister are going to recover and soon at that. I know what it's like to be young like you and have the weight of your parents responsibilities on your shoulders. I was there just like you. God bless you, young one. Pray and stay close to God. He will help you through this hard time.

Answer 11

I read your story twice, i am a mom of two teenagers , but i also was a teenager once, and i still remember it. it isn't always easy. i don't know why your sis and bro went into the hospital that night the police came to your door, and i don't know who frank is, but i want to say to you...... everyone handles things differently, and i have to say you have heart gal, not everyone put in your situation could have dealt with all that pressure. and i'm saying this from personal experience. i lost my mom at 21 years old and i fell apart, and i'm still a roller coaster ride. i can be here to talk to you if you would like.