She was my little angel, the love of my life. She was my best friend. Now, I irritate her. Everything I say is 'wrong' and she fights me on everything! I try so hard to avoid arguments, but I refuse to let her get away with stuff just so she'll like me.
My question, is, do they grow up and come back to being a friend?
2007-11-02 09:21:51 · 12 answers · asked by The Grand Inquisitor 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Normally yes they do. I have 3 girls ages 27 20 18 and I also raised my 2 nieces ages 20 22. And yes it can be very hard at times. I am very close to all my girls especially now that they have all moved out and are on they're own. They love to tell me how they should've listened more as a teen. Not that I was right (lol) about everything, but they understand what I meant now. We still get together as much as we can and I miss them so much every day. I talk to one of them everyday. Now that I have my 1st grand baby my oldest daughters, She constantly says how much she loves me and understands the bonds we have. I was also a troubled teen married at 15 and had my 1st girl at 16. That day changed my life forever.In a instant I realized my parents werent so bad after all! It is a hard time for you right now, But odds are she'll grow up and your relationship will be better than you ever realized it would be. God Bless! Hang in there! P.S. my mother was my best friend until her passing in 1991.
2007-11-02 09:48:19 · answer #1 · answered by age2purrfection 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Oh, I'm sorry honey. I don't have any grown children but I was that girl....
When I was a teenager and even into college, I wasn't always the nicest to my mom. Teenage girls have alot of unique pressures - pressure to be thin, to have a boyfriend, to have sex, to do drugs, to wear the latest clothes. If she in ANY way identifies YOU with those problems, then she'll take out her frustrations on you. All I can tell you is that you have to stay strong and be tough. If she senses in ANY way that you are getting weak or that she can get away with stuff, then she'll walk all over you.
Something that all grown children understand is RESPECT. Sit her down and say "I know you're going through a rough, confusing time in your life right now but I want you to know that I will always love you and be here if you want advice or need to talk. But I will NOT be disrespected or treated like crap. Loving you does not mean I have to lose all respect for myself. I will ask that you treat me AT LEAST as good as you do your friends. I am your mother and I don't think that is asking for too much."
2007-11-02 09:32:35 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well I think you already know what to do, because you said it there at the end of your question. Just sit them down (maybe even have your girlfriend there to hear this too) and tell them in a mature way how you feel about their daughter. Tell them you will take care of her and assure to them (and your girlfriend) that you will never be unfaithful again. I am sure they will appreciate your honesty and hopefully they will accept you again. Now be prepared for the other side of it too. You have a 50/50 chance and there is that other chance that they may never think of you the same. It's hard, but it's possible to have a relationship with someone whose parents don't really care for you (I'm in one currently). Just remember you are dating your girlfriend and not her parents. You focus on bettering your relationship and maybe one day her parents will come around. Good luck!!
2016-04-02 01:04:33 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Awwww.... the reason I was happy that my most recent ultrasound showed that baby number two is another boy.
When I read this, I was picturing my mom writing this when I was younger. I think it started around the age of 13 for me. But, during that time, I argued w/ my dad a lot. Around the age of 15-16, it all shifted to my mom. We couldn't seem to get along for anything. At the time, it was all "her" fault in my eyes. One day, out of nowhere, I had a wake up call (I was around 21). I felt horrible for the way I treated my mom all of those years and vowed to make up for it. We became very good friends again. A few years later I became a mom & our bond has grown even closer since that happened.
You will be friends again, just be patient w/ her. Good luck!!
(I agree w/ what crissygirly said about you being her parent first.)
2007-11-02 09:43:14 · answer #4 · answered by Nina Lee 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm 13. I'm constantly going in and out with my mom. I'll tell the truth. Part of it is my mom's fault, and some of it is out of her control. Our personalities clash sometimes, as well as our habits. Sometimes I do think some of it is her fault. Some of the smaller comments she makes (like me), are unecessary and just provoke arguments. I try to avoid her, but apparentaly at my age she was a perfect angel who never got into arguments with her parents, always got perfect grades (I have all 95+, I believe. I have at least a 90 in everything), and blah blah. Well, she was a boring, shy person that has no creativity. I'm hyper, outgoing, I think outside my comfort zone... But I still love her. She doesn't hate you, I promise. She gets temporarily mad (most likely), then in about an hour, totally gets over it. She might just hold grudges better. But, yes, she'll come back around. (Most likely around college time). Good luck with her. :)
2007-11-02 09:38:24 · answer #5 · answered by L 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If the bond was that strong to begin with, yes, she'll come back. I went through a phase with my mother as we all do where she didn't know anything and I knew it all. Now, she is a second mother to my son and I see her almost every day. On the other hand, my husband was never really that close to his mother and one really bad argument over time was all it took for him to say that's enough, the relationship is more trouble than it's worth. Just keep showing her how much you love her and butt out when it's appropriate. You don't say how old she is but I'm betting early 20's.
2007-11-02 09:31:37 · answer #6 · answered by danniemarie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My mom and I fought so much while I was in high school. I went to college several states away. After I graduated things got a lot better between us and now she's my best friend. I don't like with my parents anymore but I still go over to their house to hang out.
2007-11-02 09:34:44 · answer #7 · answered by CAITLIN 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you will recall it is a very difficult transition from a child to adulthood. In my experience, especially with kids that were very close with their parent(s), they have to pick a fight or get angry in order to find the courage and strength to make that transition.
Meanwhile, encourage her independence by asking her opinions and advise and letting her make more choices etc.., without your input. When she makes good choices, pat her on the back. Let her know you love her no matter what and eventually, she will come around.
2007-11-02 09:42:48 · answer #8 · answered by wondermom 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I too was THAT GIRL. I was a hellion from age 16-19 years old. Then I moved out and learned that my mom wasn't actually as stupid as I thought... and the older I get the wiser I think my mom. Give her some time and make sure to leave the door open to her no matter how stupid and immature she is.
And don't ever give in to her because you want to be her friend. You are her parent first. It is your job to teach and guide, and love her. Trust me... she will respect you more as she gets older. Bless you!
2007-11-02 09:40:53 · answer #9 · answered by crissygirly 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My brother was that way. He had these few years when he wouldn't acknowledge ANYONE, always had a scowl on his face and nothing made him happy. Then, one day it was like the light switch was flipped and once again he was a thoughtful, sweet and caring kid. Just take it day by day, and make sure she is getting enough sleep!
2007-11-02 09:42:23 · answer #10 · answered by the Family Lighthouse 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋