we were sleeping together for 18 months, never discussed commitment but I assumed that since we are " involved" and since it has been this long the man would feel some level of commitment to a woman. I found out that he was looking online and meeting other women. I loved this man and now my word has turned upside down. Could not sleep and eat for 3 days. I broke up with him and asked to never contact me again. Now, 1 months later I feel numb inside and trying to move on with my life. ..I received an unexpected email from him. He said he wants to talk. I DO NOT want to see him but my friends tell me to go and see what he is gonna say.
I'm 36, he is 47and divorced twice.
Should I go and listen to his BS tell him one more time how I feel and how much he hurt me or just to email him back and say that I do not want to see him anymore ?
I cannot forgive him.
2007-11-02 02:27:21 · 9 answers · asked by L. L 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
There comes a time when you must stand alone.
You must feel confident enough within yourself to follow your own dreams.
You must be willing to make sacrifices.
You must be capable of changing and rearranging your priorities so that your final goal can be achieved.
Sometimes, familiarity and comfort need to be challenged.
There are times when you must take a few extra chances and create your own realities.
Be strong enough to at least try to make your life better.
Be confident enough that you won't settle for a compromise just to get by.
Appreciate yourself by allowing yourself the opportunities to grow, develop, and find your true sense of purpose in this life.
Don't stand in someone else's shadow when it's your sunlight that should lead the way.
2007-11-10 00:47:03 · answer #1 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, if you truly loved this man, why not find out what he has to say. It sounds like you never discussed your feelings with him in the first place. I'm dating a man and we both made it perfectly clear that although it's still rather casual, neither one of us will be seeing other people. You should have made him aware of how you felt rather than just assuming that you two had a committed relationship. Now you have the chance to tell him how you feel. Good luck.
2007-11-02 02:33:36 · answer #2 · answered by Kathy R 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is two ways to look at this:
1.) THat I have been in this situation before I told him the same thing he ask to talk to me and screwed me over again I wouldn't go he could put all the charm and just blind you from seeing that he would do it again.
2) That you to never talked about commitment and you can't hold that against him. and you can go and see him take him back only with a commitment and then if he does that again put him out of your life completely. TAKE ALL OF THESE SLOW NEXT TIME. COMMUNICATE
2007-11-02 02:36:11 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Aw i'm sorry, My bf almost broke up with me the other day and i broke out crying...That was a different situation. Anyway, You should see what he has to say. I know you cant forgive him but at least see if hes sorry, maybe you could make an *** out of him. Like get with him and just **** around with him, then leave and see how he feels, or somthing to make him taste his own medicine!
2007-11-02 02:35:05 · answer #4 · answered by Robin 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honestly, since you didn't really discuss commitment and you assumed that he was dealing with only you, you have to realize that you gave him that option to be with other people without really knowing it. Yes he was very wrong for dealing with you for that period of time without laying out what the relationship really meant to him, but it seems to be that you really loved him and he just wanted a woman to cater to his every needs without a REAL COMMITMENT...NO STRINGS ATTACHED.
I feel your anger, but also look at his record...divorced TWICE, it seems like his track record sucks.
If you can't forgive him then, move on with your life. But if you want to talk to him, then do it, if only for closure for your heart.
2007-11-02 02:49:46 · answer #5 · answered by T 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is only my opinion, but I think you should hold on to your guns and let that idiot out of your life once and for all. What he did to you was WAY WRONG. The loss will be his and his alone, and personally....I hope he suffers DAMN MERRCILESSLY. Lastly, I'm so very sorry for what he did to you. He had no right, WHATSOEVER to do you like he did. Somewhere out there is a good man who will treat you with the love and respect you so surely deserve, I hope and pray you find him. Good Luck.
2007-11-02 02:35:06 · answer #6 · answered by Mike M. 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think you should leave him alone. It will just stir up feelings for him and you know he's going to try to convince you to take him back. You deserve better. Next time hold off on sleeping with a guy until you know he loves you...
2007-11-02 02:32:48 · answer #7 · answered by D C 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd say it's your life, not your freind's, so you decide how you want it to continue. If you feel that seeing him & ranting again about how much he hurt you would bring you closure then go-for-it, but if you just want to pt the whole sorry episode behind you then just email him back say you're not willing to meet him & if he has anything to say he can say it by email if he has to.
2007-11-02 02:31:57 · answer #8 · answered by Bubbly Blonde 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
if, for you it really is over, then ignore the email altogether
if you need answers then see him, but why dredge it all up again and give him the satisfaction of seeing what he has done to you?
2007-11-02 02:31:20 · answer #9 · answered by ♠ Merlin ♠ 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
jus listen to what he has to say, and then after his done, repeat to him that it's over, that u r going to try to move on and find someone better, someone who will not hurt you... like he did...
2007-11-02 02:34:24 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋