My parents expect too much? Dunno what to do?

Question

I was born in India though I am not Indian. I was raised in a very introverted sort of an atmosphere. I was never ever encouraged to go out and socialize and now my family moved to Germany and now my parents suddenly changed their view of things. They suddenly want me to go out and socialise and they want me to open up. I have spent 14 years as an introvert and now suddenly they are like ordering me to be an extrovert. I have been trying my level best. I joined debate club, I have made quite a few friends and my grades are OK too. But they want me to be something more than that. They keep complaining about my gardes too. I am getting like A- in everything and still they want more. They are just not ready to believe that I am working hard enough. I am so screwed. I am really going to break at one point.

Answer 1

have you told them what you've written here?? it may help, if not, see a school counselor and have him/her speak to your parents. Life is a learning process, you must take things in increments. Go at your own pace.

Answer 2

Speaking as a parent - we see things in a different perspective than the average teenager. But I know what you mean - I remember feeling stressed at that age. It's a time when everything is changing, and you're suddenly in new situations and conditions that you never saw before, and you're not sure how to handle a new culture, new school, new people, new foods.

So here's my suggestions:

first - keep in mind that this too, shall pass. It may seem like forever, but you will adapt, you will feel more comfortable every day, and things will get better. Keep a journal if you like, and after a few months, go back and look at stuff you wrote back when. This will give you some perspective.

Second, talk to your parents. Tell them you are working hard, and you do want to get good grades. Ask them to back off on the pressure just a bit, so that you can have a little less stress in your life. If you think your parents will get upset about this, then try to talk to them in a public place, like in a restaurant or in a crowded shopping mall. That may sound like an odd place to do this, but it keeps people from getting too excited and raising their voices.

Finally - try to build some free time in your schedule, where you can just do nothing. Go for a walk with friends, ride your bike, exercise, watch TV, or work on a hobby. Exercise is VERY good at reducing stress, and the health benefits are great, too. You don't need to build super muscles, just burn off some extra energy.

Hang in there, and good luck!

Answer 3

remind them that you are doing the best you can. Also put in the arguement that your grades can only be so high. They can only go to an A no further. If it doesn't work just ignore what they are saying about your grades and keep trying to the best of your ability. As long as you know that you are trying your hardest who cares what they think.
I know all kids seek the approval of their parents and want them to be proud of them no matter what. But just remind them that you are trying and they can only push you so far before you fall off the edge.

Answer 4

I think you are a great kid and is there anyone in your family you can talk to or someone in school and your social life sounds great to me just hang in there and keep up the good work and have someone to explain to your parents about the pressure you are feeling try getting another adult to talk to your parents whether it be a priest, teacher or relative

Answer 5

only be polite. Even now i'm a mom, i do no longer like to work out image after image of somebody's infant (i will look after some newborn ones and the occasional humorous image - yet I do lose interest whilst somebody consistently sends me photos of their infant doing no longer something especially as 'updates' for months or years on end - I actual have a pal who does this and that i see her infant usually besides!!). for this reason I attempt to no longer bore those with too many photos except they ask - I placed them on my facebook so my pals can see them in the event that they % to or ignore approximately them in the event that they do no longer. yet you in common terms would desire to grin, nod alongside and do the pretend cooing ingredient. it extremely is in common terms a nicety. confident, in honesty, they in all possibility do anticipate you to assert "Awww, bless, s/he's sooo amazing" - and would in all possibility be indignant in case you probably did otherwise. So only dream up some ordinary responses and use them - existence is packed with annoying circumstances like that, regardless of if it extremely is not the top of the worldwide!

Answer 6

Do not live your life for someone else. You are your own person. You are who you are and you should be very proud of yourself for knowing you're doing your best.

Parents always want the best for their children, but you have to understand they're human beings as well. Sometimes they think more with their hearts than their brains; to put it nicely.

Just do what you think is right and live life to its fullest. It is my opinion that this is the only life you are going to have, so make the best of it.

Answer 7

So nest time they start then say to the 'You are expecting too much of me'. Carry on by saying exactly what you have said here. Say it calmly and without getting annoyed with them. If that does not work type it out in a letter to them.

Answer 8

You're a good son. You do whatever your parents tell you to do, but they must realize that you're not a robot that everything they wish will come true, at your expense!

Answer 9

No parents do expect more from their children.