Should I forgive?

Question

I know as Christians we are urged to "Keep putting up with each other", because we are all imperfect.
And "forgive one another"

I remember my mom told me once, when someone hurts you, they gain a certain level of power over your emotions, and when you don't forgive them they keep that power. So in order to regain control over your feelings you should forgive them for hurting you.

As much as I understand Jehovah's teachings and my mom's wise words, is it un- Christian-like to not forgive someone who isn't sorry for what they did?

Answer 1

i think that there is a christian way of dealing with things. we are imperfect humans. it is not easy for us to 'forget'. jehvoah can forgive and forget so well that its as if we have never done 'that thing' that we have done. it is not as easy for us to do that. i think if they are not sorry there is no reason for you to forgive them. they are not asking for forgiveness.. but the one thing you can do is keep peace in the congragation and within the organisation. if this person is around you can be nice to them and dont create any tention. if they ever ask for your forgiveness on this matter talk to them. tell them exactly how you feel maybe you'll find someting out you didn tknow and you can work out a comon ground and make a new friend. i hope this helped!

Answer 2

Something that occurred over 25 years in the past practically ruined my lifestyles. Every time I concept approximately it, the hatred again. Even regardless that the individual in charge on no account requested for my forgiveness, I finally did. Someone else concerned did ask and by way of that point I had permit cross of the animosity. There are a few matters which take place in lifestyles which will on no account be forgiven or forgotten. I am happy I selected not to permit it wreck what years I have left.

Answer 3

There are some people who it is just plain hard or well nigh impossible to forgive. Even though your paster or priest is likely to tell you that those people are suffering, too--and you know they probably are--it's still hard to forgive them. If you have ever worked in CPS or had dealings with it, you know what I mean.

I think everyone has their own set of standards, a point past which we each decide that some actions are unforgivable. I do agree with your mother (who had amazing insight!) that forgiving someone who has harmed you diminishes their emotional power over you. But I think perhaps overcoming fear of such people might work in the same way as forgiving them. And maybe overcoming fear is the same as forgiveness; I don't know. It might be a different route to the same thing.

I personally don't feel it's un-Christian to not forgive someone who has no remorse about harming people, though it's something we should strive for. Maybe God knows how to forgive people like that, but I don't.

Answer 4

The thing I learned the hard way - and I mean the very hard way - is that unforgiveness hurts US way more than the person we are not forgiving! All the anger, bitterness, resentment - they are killers - even science will tell you that.

Once you let go of all that baggage and learn to forgive - no matter how much abuse you have suffered - you will actually start to feel better.

And that's the dirty little secret of forgiveness. It is a totally selfish act that makes you feel better!

Answer 5

from a simple human point of view, forgiving alone will allow you yourself to move on. In essense, if you don't forgive, you end up hurting yourself in the 'hate' or 'anger' as you live with those emotions.

Your lack of forgiving does not really hurt the other person, but if you do forgive, you end up easing the emotional pain you put yourself though more than anythings else.

hope it made some sense

take care :)

Answer 6

im glad you understand the word and i love your mom as well.

as christians we can't hold on to things that are not taking us anywhere, and we forgive so that we can be well and because christ forgives us all the time.

imagine how many things you have done that are not pleaseng before the eyes of god and you never asked for his forgiveness? but he has forgiven you because of the way you live now.

forgive 70 times 7 in a day.

Answer 7

Ah!
".....isn't sorry for what they did."
There is the key phrase.
Why are they not regretful?
Are they justifying their actions?
Would they do it again?
If they are persisting in a wrong course, what is to forgive? ....especially if, in the back of their mind, they think their actions might be wrong.
Does pride have too strong a hold on them?
We can only forgive those who seek forgiveness.
Regarding others who persist in wrongdoing ....distance yourself.
Do not continue to talk on the subject, that would be loving.
Make your statement, then go your way.

Answer 8

You forgive so that you can be forgiven. We pray in the Lord's Prayer: "Forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us." In this petition, we are asking God to look at our own behavior and judge us accordingly.

It also keeps your heart from being hardened by unforgiveness. You certainly need to not put yourself into a situation where you can have the same things done to you, but your treatment of the person and your state of heart determines your level of forgiveness, not blindly getting into the same position again.

hope this helps

Answer 9

That depends, surely, on the degree and type of wrong done to you, and the extent of hurt that you suffered.

If someone stole your parking space and doesn't regret it, just forget the whole thing. Forgive them if you feel like it.

If someone raped you and doesn't regret it, you may choose to forgive them AFTER you've had them arrested and punished.

CD

Answer 10

As Christians we are commanded to forgive others as God in Christ has forgiven us (Ephesians 5:32). We can forgive because God has given us the abundance of grace and the gift of His righeousness to reign in life (Romans 5:17). When you humble yourself to obey God He will give you the grace to forgive. It is not good for us to harbor any unforgiveness in us as it would cause us all kinds of harm especially to our health and well-being. Let it go by forgiving with God's grace.