A couple of weeks ago an older women ( she's 35, I'm 22) gave me her number after working on a project toughter. She came over twice, but nothing happened between us, even after she told me she likes guys to take charge. I went as far as too ask for a kiss, but she said "no", and gave some lame excuse for why she couldn't kiss me. So, a 35 year old women, wants a 22 year old as a friend? Anyways, I was confused after she left and haven't felt like calling for another rejection. But today out of the blue she called me " too see how I was doing" Which I thought was weird, because why would you want to hang out or even talk too someone you rejected? Do you think she was just plating hard to get. It's not like I really want her, because I am just getting ouy of a relationship of 2 years and don't have the energy for another women. What do you think I should do regarding this older women? I it was you, what would you do?
2007-11-01 19:09:43 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
If you don't have the energy, don't pursue this. You'll only be halfhearted and the relationship will probably reflect this.
As for the rejection-- she told you she wants the guy to take charge. She didn't want you to ask for a kiss, she wanted you to just do it. She's an older woman which already sets her up as feeling like the initiator, whether she was or not. I know this, as I just got out of a relationship with a younger guy. Know one of the major reasons why? I always felt like I was "in charge." I felt like I was his caretaker. Women don't want that, they want to be taken care of (mostly). You're probably just not the right fit for her, sorry. :( She's probably trying to rationalize this in her head by trying to get you to be more aggressive, which, face it, will be an act, and one you can't keep up in the long run. She sounds confused, and lonely. Don't go there is my very firm advice. She will make you very confused right along with her, and miserable too.
2007-11-01 19:17:03 · answer #1 · answered by avacado pie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"Playing hard to get" doesn't really exist for women. We are more complicated than you. Not giving you a kiss is not necessarily rejection, it just could be not the right time. Women think more long-term. She is weighing multiple things in her cost-benefit/future prediction analysis when you ask her for a kiss. You on the other hand are thinking of the question as just asking for a kiss!
She called because she wants the attention. She liked the fact that you wanted a kiss.
She may not know what she wants, and most likely it changes from moment to moment.
Good luck!!
You can still have fun and enjoy yourself with her without the physical acknowledgment. If not, maybe you should find someone else or re-think your priorities.
2007-11-02 02:19:56 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you dont have enough energy for another women then why did you ask for a kiss? Most women like the feeling of being wanted and she is probably one of those women because of her age. It is also very flattering for a 22 year old to be interested in a 35 year old and she probably wants to keep around because you made her feel beautiful and wanted. She might not want to date or kiss or be in a relationship but she might want to just be flirty friends. You made her feel very good, she will more then likely throw you a few mixed signals to keep you on your toes so you keep making her feel beautiful. If you have or find the energy to be with her i would try again and if that fails ask her what he deal is and why she is throwing mixed signals and depending on her reaction and answer you will know what to do. hope this helps.
2007-11-02 02:17:05 · answer #3 · answered by dizzy dolly 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Listen up, this is quite simple...you don't know or probably forgot since you've been out of the dating seen for about 2 years how to play the game...It's simple she rejected the kiss not you...for that situation you should've initiated the kiss not ask for it of course she is going to say no...is similar to aksing a woman out and telling her lets go out...SHE TOLD YOU TO TAKE CHARGE...DO IT.
Now don't get me wrong, I don't mean turn into a demanding person, but take the lead...women love this in a guy. And yeah she called you back because she is stll interested and its obviously not a friendship...you can and should take this as far as you want it because you are in charge.
If it was me I would take care of whatever business I want with her and move on or keep her as a friend w/benefits it depends.
2007-11-02 02:20:14 · answer #4 · answered by 7th_engineer 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
never mind what she did; what would you prefer to do is the question you should be asking yourself. if your preference is to be her friend, then be a friend. if on the other hand, you find her attractive and would like to see her and/or start dating her, then just be honest and let her know of your intentions.
there's nothing wrong with her phone call; she sounds like a caring person to take the time to call and ask how you're doing. take care of yourself first and don't let the past take control of today. the past is over so embark on a new journey; besides, every day brings new beginnings.
and oh, call her and ask her how's she doing?
2007-11-02 02:34:45 · answer #5 · answered by ru4real130 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She said she likes men in control and you ASKED for a kiss. Dude she is whacked. She wants you to be her little puppet and become the man she doesn't have. It is the same thing Older men do with youner women. They take their gullible little minds and control them and try to shape them into what they want instead of loving them for who they are. You are setting yourself up for misery. Just find someone your age or be alone til your ready for a woman your age.
2007-11-02 02:15:01 · answer #6 · answered by James Watkin 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She already said it. She wants a man who takes charge. That doesn't mean asking her for permission to kiss her. If you want her just kiss her. She'll either kiss you back and you're in or she won't. Either way you will know.
2007-11-02 02:14:14 · answer #7 · answered by don_sv_az 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
35 is told old for you. When she calls don't answer the phone and then go as far as blocking her number. She is playing games with you. Why would you want someone that old anyway when you are a guy? Cougars are disgusting.
2007-11-02 02:14:24 · answer #8 · answered by epsilonlambda2000 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
she doesn't want any relationships with u. if she is mentally normal. she just wants a piece of young meat. if u want a free f'u'c'k' without any consequences - call her and ask her for coffee. at your place. and then u don't ask for a kiss u retard. u just kiss.
2007-11-02 02:15:45 · answer #9 · answered by yeahright 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She just wanna be friends
2007-11-02 02:13:41 · answer #10 · answered by IIDX Chem 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋