Do you think my boyfriend's mom got pregnant with him on purpose?

Question

My boyfriend and I have been together for 5 years, he is 21, I'm 19. He is Mexican and White (mom and dad are both halfers). I am Filipino and white..I was raised a little differently as I have believed my whole life in going to school, getting a good education, getting married, THEN having children. But I am very open minded to other people's beliefs and lifestyles, including my boyfriend's family. You see, his family (mom's side) drinks a lot, some have done/ do drugs, and seems like everyone has at least one kid by 20, married or not, and they dont care. His mom got pregnant/had him at 20, even tho his dad wanted nothing to do with him (to this day still). I wonder tho if maybe she got pregnant with him on purpose because all 6 of her sisters had at least one kid by 20 and she was the last one without one, or was she just not being careful? Is it possible for some women to just want a baby? I was curious because as I am getting older, his family expects me to have a baby

I guess back int he day she was kinda like a little "wanna-be" chola kind of chick..I mean this woman is very nice and smart, so I wonder how she got pregnant at a young age without knowing any better...and how she carries this belief with her that you should have a kid by 21? Put it this way, her mother and father had their eldest at 18, and all their daughters had their first kid by 20, all out of wedlock. they just give me a hard time for not having a kid yet..but i feel I'm actually doing something with my life by going to college and working...Not everyone gives me a hard time...mostly they are just joking, but still...

Of course I know better..there is no way I'm having a baby until I'm emotionally, physically, and financially secure..and of course i'd like to be married...i just get tired of their joking and acting like having a baby is not a big deal b/c it is

Answer 1

Hi there is no right and wrong age in when people have their first child.Its where your mind is at that counts. Do you want the responsibility for the next 18yrs or so of nurturing and raising another human being?Can you support them financially? Can you put self aside and focus on the needs of the child?Do you have support for yourself and a child.Is it ok to raise a child surrounded by drug and alchol abuse???
Think carefully girl don't be pressured by others.You seem sensible you will know when the time is right for you.

Answer 2

Wow, don't let simply apathy get in the way of your complicated empathy. In other words, they don't care about education, the rest of the world, or the wrongness their doing. Its the last thing on their mind, their simple people, with simple goals. So if thats how you want to live your life, listen to them. On the other hand you want to accept you actually care more, or rather EMPATHSIZE more with your fellow man, and your purpose in life, don't let them distract you. Typically this behavoir isn't a reflect of their ideals, its their reflection of not knowing any other way to relate with you. Do you think they understand WHY your the way your are? Don't you see, or feel that them bring you to that level of having a kiddo like them, would put you in the same place they are, THEREFOR giving them away to relate with you? Think about it.......

Answer 3

She may have gotten pregnant on purpose to follow suit with her family. Do not let them pressure you into having a child before your ready and have finished school