please be relistic my 14teen yearold daughter wants to date and i do not know what to tell her?
she makes good grades and keeps up with her chores?
it is just so hard to decide?
2007-11-01 08:25:57 · 33 answers · asked by duckE 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Too young for a formal date. might not be bad for a daytime date or spending time at the mall semi-supervised or something.
2007-11-01 08:29:21 · answer #1 · answered by Runa 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If she is mature and responsible then I would say that attending school dances with someone special or other functions where there is adult supervision would be fine. Also fine would be going to the movies with several friends, one of whom might be 'special' - but only if a parent delivers the group to the movie and picks them up. Things like birthday parties at a restaurant would also be fine but I'd keep my 14 y/o daughter safe by not allowing her to go out alone with anyone until she is at least 16. At 16 I would still want some supervision, pick up and drop off, etc. Children of 14 - no matter how good the grades, etc. are simply not equipped to handle bad situations. Assure her that you love and trust *her* but your job as a parent is to safeguard her and she needs to accept that. Volunteer to take her and her friends to the movies - sit away from them or see another movie in the same location while they have fun being kids. It IS hard to decide ... and scary. When you decide the time is right then be sure to know the person she's going out with and, when practical, his or her parents also. Good luck ...
2007-11-01 08:35:46 · answer #2 · answered by Santal 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her this: dating a person is not like trying on a pair of shoes. Dating is a process that two people go through seeing if this person is possibly the person they will marry. It is not some recreational activity for teens and young adults.( although it should be a pleasant process) It is serious. Find a person you want to get to know as a person not for popularity. Dating and then breaking up with someone so many times is just not worth the heartache. Grades and chores should'nt have anything to do with it.
2007-11-01 08:34:37 · answer #3 · answered by Sir Tobin 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I was 14 when I started dating but I also lost my virginity at 14 :(
I felt so grown up and mature at the time but I really regret it now.
I would say that your daughter is probably more sensible than I was but it's not like I'm an idiot, I just made a mistake. These things can happen and she might feel pressured at some point so I would say to make her wait until she is 16 for her own good.
2007-11-01 08:30:45 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Fourteen is a good time to group date. And if she feels the pressure to be dating becuase her friends are talk to her seriously explain she can go to well lit public places to be spotted by friends and not feel she is left out. Peer pressure is hard and the real reason she wants to date. (also hormones) so talk seriously about the dating and what she should and shoudn't do. Explain that the lighting and publicity will make sure she is not put in a bad place where she will do something she will most likely regret. (I don't mean sex) but even making out or things she may not want to do but feels pressured to.
2007-11-01 08:33:02 · answer #5 · answered by nyc 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with the above... 16 is a great age to start dating one on one. If she is really pestering you, make a deal that if she keeps her grades up and does her chores she can do group dates. That way you both are covered. I hope this helps
2007-11-01 08:39:20 · answer #6 · answered by ladyluck 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd tell her to at least wait another 3 years or so. Teenagers can be a little bit irresponsible at times and things happen, no matter how much their parents warn them about sex and stuff. Even if your daughter can be the wiser one of the other, things happen. Just ask her if the guy is earning his own money yet, if not, then don't cos you don't want your daughter spending on someone else's parents' money :P That would be my excuse.
2007-11-01 08:31:43 · answer #7 · answered by Hanna 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
14 means she's a Freshman in high school? I think she is old enough to date. Give her some guidelines. Tell her what age group you think is acceptable. I would say 13-16, but that is up to you. Tell her the types of dates she is allowed to go on. Movies, high school football games...these are all good places for young daters. Probably shouldn't let her go by herself in a car....if you aren't sure if you want her to date, then you aren't ready for her life to be entrusted to the hands of a young male driver...
2007-11-01 08:31:40 · answer #8 · answered by smellyfoot ™ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
14 or 15 for supervised/group dates...16 minimum for one-on-one dates.
Her grades and chores have less to do with the issue than her being mature enough to handle the adult situations that can occur when dating, including sexual situations. No matter how smart or hard working she is, I doubt she's ready to deal with getting pregnant or an STD, y'know?
2007-11-01 08:30:25 · answer #9 · answered by . 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
16 on group dates 17 or 18 on one on ones.
I recommend that the first date be with the family or if you are really bold, just the boy and the father. This will help to chase off the ones that are only after sex.
2007-11-01 08:30:14 · answer #10 · answered by Carl W 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say to wait until you're ready to look for a life mate. Now for most people that's 18. I know it's a little old, but I think little 6-7-8-9th graders who date are well.... I'll hold back my language. But they're doing stuff that their parents haven't even done. Nor would any sane person. So thats all I have to say.
2007-11-01 08:30:04 · answer #11 · answered by Summie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋