Im in a family member's wedding in a few days and I've decided not to take my boyfriend of 2 1/2. I feel obligated to be in the wedding, and both of us really dont get along with the bride and groom. My mom is upset and thinks that my boyfriend should go. Now she's giving me lip about it and says that we dont do anything as a couple and i should be worried. Is she right? or should I blow her opinion off?
2007-11-01 06:55:17 · 10 answers · asked by coconutqtpie 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
He goes to every other event and holiday, but theres been so much drama with this wedding that he'd rather not go. I dont blame him, because I myself dont want to go. When I was asked to be in the wedding, everyone was on good terms, so I accepted, since then, everything has gone down hill, and since it's my cousin, I'm pretty much obligated.
2007-11-01 08:06:36 · update #1
No, if you two have been together for two and a half years, and you are happy, then she is wrong about that. My husband and I still go off and do our own thing quite often. We go with our friends by ourselves out for a night, or for a weekend without each other, and its not big deal.
People think we are a bit weird for not doing every single thing together...and his mom has made comments about it off handedly several times over the years, but we relish our free time on our own away from each other. Of course we do things together, we go on vacations, visit family, all the normal stuff together.
We have a one year old daughter, and we still try to maintain as close the same lifestyle as we lived before.
It sounds to me like your mom may be worried about losing face at the wedding if her daughters boyfriend isn't there - especially since I assume its well known that you are only there out of obligation and that neither of you get along very well with the couple getting married. She will get over it.
2007-11-01 07:23:04 · answer #1 · answered by SisterSue 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Only you know the stability of your relationship. I wouldn't take his reluctance to go to this wedding as a sign that your relationship is in trouble (unless, of course, there are other signs). But, your mom is right that your boyfriend should accompany you. After 2 1/2 years of dating, you are a firmly established couple, and the social obligations of one become the social obligations of the other. It is really an insult to your family for him not to attend.
2007-11-01 07:34:51 · answer #2 · answered by Trivial One 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
These two things seem like separate issues. If he does attend most functions with you, but doesn't want to go to the wedding, that's one thing, but if he truly doesn't accompany you anywhere, what's he around for? And this doesn't really have anything to do with the wedding or bridal couple. Maybe your mother has a valid point based on alot more than this one single event.
2007-11-01 07:02:53 · answer #3 · answered by melouofs 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
do you think she's right that you guys don't do anything as a couple, is he just trying to get out of your family obligations? she may be thinking that way if he never comes around. I'd take him with you for appearance sake then just leave early if you guys don't really like the bride and groom anyway.
2007-11-01 06:59:51 · answer #4 · answered by Sarahz 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are in the wedding you will be busy with the wedding party. Unless the bride & groom are having a sweetheart table, then your BF will be sitting alone or with your Mom.
If your BF isn't that close to them, let him have a night off.
2007-11-01 07:10:35 · answer #5 · answered by nova_queen_28 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have a friend who did this 2x this summer to 2 different friends...she rsvp'd that her boyfriend was coming, then at the last minute he doesn't show up and she has a lame excuse! if they have paid their caterer for his meal, he either shows up or you have to double the check you're writing as your gift to make up for the meal he won't be eating. if you don't get along with the bride, why did she ask you to be in the wedding, and why did you accept?
2007-11-01 08:00:51 · answer #6 · answered by Danielle 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he doesnt get along well with the bride and groom, he shouldnt go. Its better that he doesnt go and put on a happy face. What matters is what you guys think.
2007-11-01 07:05:28 · answer #7 · answered by tarie75 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Does he want to attend? That's who you should be listening to.
Good luck
2007-11-01 06:58:42 · answer #8 · answered by Blunt 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
give him the option if he dont want to go its not on you
2007-11-01 07:08:19 · answer #9 · answered by Miranda 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no
2007-11-01 07:12:40 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋