What to do about daughter whose failure at PE is making her very unhappy?

Question

My daughter is 9. She is very very bad at sports and she dreads going to school on PE days. Despite best attempts, I don't think she will ever be able to do basic things like forward rolls, handstands, headstands, cartwheels, climb on climbing frames etc. Although she was very badly behind other children in swimming she is now begining to catch up and I think she could be quite good at that; she also has no problems with co-ordination in dancing although she will never make a dancer.

She walked at 16 months and had difficulty going down stairs one foot at a time until she was about 5 or 6.

Where is the dividing line between being bad at sports or having a physical disability? Could she have some undiagnosed disability? What should I do? She is so unhappy as it is affecting her friendships when she can't play with the others in the playground because she can't physically manage their games? I feel so sorry for her.

Can anyone give me some advice?

It hasn't really been noticeable until now because some things she does really well such as skipping and she has done well in her ballet exams; also she is a talented musician and has no problem with coordination there. I'm wondering whether it is more pyschological than physical?

Answer 1

I would talk to her doctor. But I would also talk to her PE teacher. Perhaps she isn't interested in being so involved in these sports/activities, and therefore isn't learning or picking up on them as quickly as the others her age. If the PE teacher is giving her a failing grade, my guess is: most likely it isn't because she is not doing the work correctly, but not putting effort into it. I am only speculating, but I would think that a teacher shouldn't fail a student if they are trying their best. Perhaps the PE teacher could give you some recommendations, give you his/her opinions on your disability questions, and possibly even offer alternative assignments for your daughter so that she does not fail. This one on one time with the teacher may be helpful for your daughter and may get her to like at least some part of the physical activity.
Good luck!

Answer 2

Dose she get a lot of ear infections. The inner ear having a problem will cause balance issues. Take her to an ear nose and throat specialist just to make sure. Keep in mind that some kids are just late at developing and that she may catch up in a year or 2. I know you feel sorry for her, but I think the worst thing you can do is coddle her to much. Then she will think it's OK to run from a problem and this can cause bigger ones. Teach her to face these difficulties head on and not to ever run and hide from anything, that way she doesn't develop into a quitter. It's not how good she is, it's about how hard she tried and about the character that she is building in the process. Whatever doesn't kill us makes us stronger, kids are resilient and she will find a way to overcome this if you just keep her trying, keep her positive and support her. Good luck and take care.

Answer 3

I would think that her pediatrician would have caught something, but there could be some underlying causes. I was under the impression that you weren't graded on your ability to play, rather your participation was what counted.

Ask the PE teacher what specifically you can do to bring that grade up. Ask if it's a question of ability or participation. Ask the teacher's opinion if you should get her checked out for a disability, since she seems to be doing so poorly.

Also, get her involved in physical extra curricular activities. Sure, she might not be the star player...might even be just a benchwarmer, but she'll learn the skills to make her more confident and will be getting physical exercise as well.

Answer 4

I don't think children should be graded in PE, for starters. I have a 5-year-old son who started walking at 15 months (normal range, I've read, is 9-19 months so your daughter wasn't *that* late) and he has some slight issues with going downstairs--as in he doesn't look where he's going.

She may have a motor delay, which can be helped with occupational therapy. My son gets occupational therapy at school.

Answer 5

you know, here's some not so good advice but I would do...don't push her. Let her be and tell her that just participating will help her pass. She doesnt have to be good at it at all. And maybe u should speak to the gym teacher to find out exactly what she expects from your daughter. Let her know your concerns and how you would like for them to handle the situation. kids love PE and when a child says they rather do math than go to gym...it's a problem. Yea and get her evaluated again. Good luck.

Answer 6

time to practice at home get her active at home. turn of the computer tv and video games even learning ones and take her out side and play catch and do the flips and stuff the only way to improve is practice.

you being defeated doesnt help. stop saying she will never do something

take her to the doctor to rule out a disability, once thats done make her practice. like everything else you just dont wake up one morning and are a star athlete they train and practice and made get her into gymnastics or something to work on balance and coordination

my son walked at 16 months so stop using that excuse. she walked on time10 months to 2 years is the norm.

yo me its sounds like shes lazy and doesnt want to particapate. get her to the doctor

and pe is graded. the kids that fail are the ones who refuse to do whats asked and they are the one generally not all cases though that are overweight or even obese. get her active.

dont allow idle time keep her up and moving. and practice

Answer 7

If she's had problems her whole life, why hasn't her pediatrician caught them?

I'd take her to the doctor, and express all of these same concerns. If she literally does not have the ability to catch the ball, or jump rope...there is a problem. Coordination has a lot to do with brain development.

Call your doctor, as soon as possible.

Answer 8

have you talked to the doctor and her teacher. she might need help with her fine or gross motor skills.
my daughter is 6 and she could not skip and jump high and walks on her toes. i had her evaluated with the school physical therapist, come to find out she needs help with her gross motor skills. she is starting to skip now, still have to remind her to walk on her feet but it is getting better.
Another idea is you can work with her, play the games the kids play on the playground,see if one of her friends also can come play with her. try to do things that the gym teacher does. encourage and praise her as much as possible when she is doing it.
good luck hun
kim

Answer 9

i would first talk with her PE instructor and receive their feedback, then i would take her to the doctor and explain the issue. they will be able to investigate records and find something others have or might have missed. you can also dedicate time after school and help her with the things she is having trouble with. this may help her also build up her self esteem.

Answer 10

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