He hits himself or scratches himself when he gets mad or frustrated. I don't know why he does this or how to stop it. We are not a violent home. I have spanked him before but it was never a main form of punishment, really only a handful of times. I don't do it anymore since before he even started hitting himself. His punishments are time-outs. He is a very good boy but gets frustrated very easily, me too. With God's help I am trying to calm down, I am just high stress and learning new techniques through prayer. We really have a loving home though. I don't know what to do about this and I fear for the future with him continuing to do this. Any suggestions?
2007-11-01 05:55:51 · 8 answers · asked by MJ 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
No daycare or sitter, just a loving aunt who lives with us. I know for sure there is no abuse. We are very close and caring. He is in our care all times except preschool, and they are super caring as well. I have absolutely no fear of this in his life right now.
2007-11-01 06:06:20 · update #1
He used to go to therapy for sensory integration disorder, too sensative. They decided, along with his doctors, that there was no autism. He is so social too. His therapist there, after the hard eating part was finished (that is where his main problem was), said she really didn't know what she could do for him because it was so neglegable. He seems fine for the most part, just quirky.
2007-11-01 06:09:25 · update #2
Your son is just frustrated and doesn't have the words in his mouth to say it. He is showing you how frustrated he is. If at any point you show facial concern/anxiety over his behavior he will continue it to get that reaction again. Make sure your son is safe first of all, but do NOT react to his behavior. Hitting or scratching himself will not really hurt him. It may even get worse before it gets better, but just ignore the behavior and it should go away... Once he stops the unwanted behavior, try to put the words you think he is trying to say out there, for example, "Sam is mad, isn't he? Sam is mad because he can't have his toy", and sometimes just knowing you've heard and understand is enough to calm them. Even though they never got their way. Best of luck!
2007-11-01 07:20:23 · answer #1 · answered by Amy G 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to stop blaming yourself first off. I would go and see a child psychologist. It is possible that your child is reacting to something. But that is not your fault. I dont' know how to word it. I have a friend who is a perfectionist. Everything is in place and clean and sparkling. Their clothes are always clean. Their toddler had the opposite personality. One day at 2 years old this toddler went into the living room where the magazines were perfectly stacked on the coffe table and strated screaming and just freaked out. this 2 year old just strated throwign the magazines and throwing them and just messing htem up, screaming. Poor kid, lol... his parents relaxed more after that. But a child that is more methodical would thrive in that enviroment. maybe your child just has a personaltiy diffrerence that is not your fault, but that needs you to make allowances for them.
I would not 'diagnose' your child though. I would go into a homopathic route. Many places will give your child herbs and such... often such things are an imbalance in the body chemicals.. and herbs and minerals can adjust that and make up for any diffiences. This is quite common in the western cutlure where so many people (including me) tend to slack off on diet.
Also, i am VERY anti spanking and will argue to high heaven about how harmful is... but honestly.. if you have been spanking in moderation... this would not cause a child to hurt himself by 3 years old.
There is something wrong within him.. and they home enviroment can be altered, and the body can receive homopathic remedies. Look into Avena.. they are in alot of countries and have helped my hyper active cousin who surely would have been diagnosed with ADD. They helped my mom get rid of a tumor that the doctors hadn't even found yet and they have helped peopel with so much. They are very good, but slightly expensive though.
The reason I would not run out and get him diagnosed is that than for his whole life he has this 'mental illness' to live up to and it will adjust his view of himself.
2007-11-01 06:15:23 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
He's testing your limits and also his own personality is emerging a bit. All of my three kids have been totally different from the start. But is there anything that's causing him anger lately? Kids pick up on Parents' stress.. Or maybe a change in environment? School, babysitters? They can't express their feelings so sometimes it comes out in actions. Just stand your ground Mom. Sounds like you know what to do. Just give him lots of love and patience!
2016-03-13 09:30:35 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i'm the godfather of a 3y old boy, and the exact thing has happened. He bangs his head against the wall, shouts at his mother, or tries to hurt her, also much worse, he swears.. because of this i think he's gonna get some slaping from his father. This started happening when his mother gave birth to a girl, now a few months old. Probably he feels his not the only center of attention anymore, that he has to "share" his "fame" with someone else. He also bit his younger sister... although most of the time theres obvious affection between the 2 of 'em.
2007-11-01 06:58:24 · answer #4 · answered by Matei Stefan 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You actually answered your own question.... He is mad and frustrated and he doesn't know how to handle these feelings. It's very simple. So, don't worry about punishment, figure out why he is frustrated, then help him solve the issue. That's it. That's all he is needing help with. We need to show our children how to deal with the stresses that are part of our world and he is desperately seeking your help with this. I think you will have solved this issue if you can help him learn to cope with his frustration.
2007-11-01 06:11:40 · answer #5 · answered by Michele J 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I tell my son you are only hurting yourself and not me and sometimes he stops, but I have also consulted his pediatrician. He may need to see a counselor or something so I would make an appt. with his doctor to discuss this. Some places have classes that teach young children how to deal with frustration this maybe something to look into
2007-11-01 06:01:32 · answer #6 · answered by shandebar 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
take him to the doctor.
does he go to day care or a babysitter if so you need to get him out of there pronto hes being abused there and is causing pain because he thinks its what he is supposed to feel
2007-11-01 06:00:37 · answer #7 · answered by kleighs mommy 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It possibly could be Austim i would take him to a doctor who can evaulate his behavor and suggest treatment
2007-11-01 06:05:57 · answer #8 · answered by ametheststone 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋