I eat everyday at my work cantine so am familiar with the staff that work there but I dont talk to them.
Yesterday. one of the women on the till said '' Have you lost some weight''? ''I spotted you the other day''.
(What a direct and thoughtless rude question?!)
I replied, ''Oh um thanks for noticing..''
She gave me no eye contact whatsoever.
Does anyone else consider this plain rude? I dont even know the woman and Never speak to her.
Im 26 - for info.
2007-10-31 23:17:46 · 61 answers · asked by Autumn 2012 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
I think it sounds like she was trying to initiate some conversation with you...
2007-10-31 23:20:21 · answer #1 · answered by Amber 3 · 11⤊ 0⤋
This woman was clearly just trying to be nice she maybe see's you everyday and wanted to start up some comunication i think what u should do next time u see her is give her some eye contact and a little smile. Perhaps she is lonely and want's someone new to talk to. After all if this woman was going to be rude she would have said u had gained weight, or not said anything at all. I think you should be happy that this lady had the nerve to say anything at all. After all making the first move in friendship or anything is always hard. If anyone was slightly rude maybe it was you...
Pause and think in future not everyone has friends although they may seem cheery thats not always the case.
Kitty x x xx
2007-10-31 23:39:26 · answer #2 · answered by teddyskitty 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well in there somewhere is a compliment yes, so take it as one. Why do you consider it rude and thoughtless? Maybe a little direct from someone you hardly know but maybe they are not good with words and just wanted to be friendly so give them the benefit of the doubt and take it in the spirit it was meant.
2007-10-31 23:22:22 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 0⤋
I don't think she was being rude. Perhaps she was just trying to start up a conversation and the reason for not making eye contact could be that she was a little nervous herself. I think that some people are often too eagar to think the worst of people. Try and look at things from a positive angle rather than immediately thinking the worst!
:)
2007-10-31 23:24:49 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
I don't think she was trying to be rude. Sounds like she was trying to break the ice and sometimes the best way to do that is with compliments. Although you took it as a negative, I bet she ment a positive. Regardless, she got your attention and you should speak with her the next time you see her.
Be nice, ask her how long she has worked there or something. The cashier is a good friend to have.
2007-10-31 23:23:04 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I don't see how you would think someone commenting on positive changes about you is in any way rude? It's a compliment that she has noticed things about you, the fact that you don't speak to her is what I would consider rude.
You can choose to ignore all this if you wish because I'm just an old socialist, but why don't you talk to the canteen staff? Is it because they only prepare your food? Would talking to them lower your appearance with your co-workers? Do you believe they're beneath you?
2007-10-31 23:40:33 · answer #6 · answered by MrClegg 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Talking about a gal's weight is always a tricky thing. Best not to, unless you know her.
However, it sounds like this woman, though perhaps not the social etiquette queen--pehaps even completely socially inept, as she couldn't even keep eye contact--meant it as a compliment. Take the compliment and forgive the lack of etiquette on her part.
2007-10-31 23:33:55 · answer #7 · answered by Gauffsa 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Definitely not - in fact it's more of a compliment and you should take it as that (unless of course she was laughing at the same time).
I take it you have weight problems and feel that people are talking behind your back. Please remember that most people out there are genuine and maybe this women was being that way when she said it.
P.s. How can you say you don't even know the woman? She serves your food every day, of course you know her!
2007-10-31 23:26:29 · answer #8 · answered by Chucksey 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you are rude. Why don't you talk to them? Are you better than they are? Are they so far beneath you that they are your servants.
These are decent hard working people. Speak to them every day. Be polite and friendly to everyone.
I would suggest you get a job in a soup kitchen serving food to the less fortunate. Maybe that would humble you a bit and make you a much better person overall.
2007-10-31 23:25:24 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you are the rude one. You are there everyday, yet do not speak to or make contact with anyone. She probably did not make eye contact with you because she knows how aloof you are.
It was a COMPLIMENT! She was making an attempt to BE NICE. Try to act less stuck up.
2007-11-01 16:12:18 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Maybe the canteen staffs were just trying to make friends with you. You should be thankful that one of them made the move to say anything to you.Maybe it was just spur of the moment question that was asked but i don't think its a rude one.Besides,you're all working in the same building.
Try to be friendly and be nice to them
2007-10-31 23:26:35 · answer #11 · answered by brainwhacker 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋