his parents are too strict?

Question

this is my friend. he's 20. he's in college. his dad's a preacher. both his parents are unbelievably strict! his parents have to know what he's doing the entire time, where he's at, who he's with, and has to call. He's going to go on a trip w/ catholics to San Francisco for a pro-life march. his dad don't want him to go cuz he doesn't want him to be influenced by the catholics. he says he's 20 and if he wants to be catholic he'll be catholic. (he's thinking of converting) His never had a "father." he had a pastor. they never once played catch or did anything together. his older brother did drugs cuz his druggie friends treated him better than his parents! Mike's 27, married w/ 3 kids now and doing well. he visits no more than twice a year. why? his parents still try and tell him what to do! My friend wasn't allowed to go to a concert w/ me because he couldn't miss youth group! we had already ordered the tickets! my parent found out I was going 2 the concert an hour before I left and

Had no problems with it! His parents wonder why he doesn’t listen to them. HELLO? CUT THE F*CKING UMBELLICAL CORD!!! I thought mine were bad until I went off to college! Over the summer, he’d have to say hey I’m going to work and call when he gets there, then call when he leaves, and has appropriate time to get home. 10-15 minutes. 20-25 if he decides to fill up or cash his check or something of that nature. GOD FORBID HE STOPS BY MY HOUSE!!! Or gets a bite to eat! We were at my house playing Guitar hero. It was a Friday night, he came back at 2 am sat. his rents were awake WAITING FOR HIM IN THE LIVING ROOM!!! We never left my house! Then there was a huge fight about how he’s an adult and they need 2 back the f*ck off and how I’m a bad influence. Umm… I don’t drink, do drugs, stay out of trouble and get good grades. I’m a horrible influence! What else… one time we were getting ready to leave. He was getting ready to put his shoes on. His socks didn’t match. One was pure white,

the other white w/ gray toes. His parents FREAKED! Mine wouldn’t have even noticed. Well, mom might have, but wouldn’t get mad. One time we donated blood together. They got mad for some dumb-a$$ reason. His dad has health problems. When he left I said to him, dude… I hope your dad has to go to the hospital and your blood saves his life. IRONY what do you folks think?

also, he's trying to build a loving relationship with his family but their strictness won't let him!

Answer 1

The man is an adult. The longer he lets his parents treat him this way the longer they will. He needs to just tell him that he can make his own decisions. Quit calling when he gets to work and all of that. He still does it so they demand it. Tell him to quit giving in to their demands. His father cannot keep him from going anywhere. He is an adult. I think that I would move as soon as possible.

Answer 2

As long as they are paying his way he is under their thumb. Your friend just has to finally get miserable enough to leave. College is great but not at the price he is paying. He can get a job, support himself, get his own place and go to night school. Keep being his friend he really needs one. Have you both considered getting an apartment together? Just an idea.

One other idea. Would his brother take him in?

Answer 3

This guy is 20 years old and needs to deal with his parents as he sees fit. Forgive me, but you need to mind your own business. Read your paragraph. You get more angry and involved the more you write. It doesn't matter whether or not you think they are fair. Your friend is not a child. He needs to make his own decisions regarding his parents. Just be his friend and let him handle his personal business.

Answer 4

I think the guy needs to have a talk with them, I grew up with a preacher, they never let me have a life, i am married now, and they still try to control me, if they dont listen, i am sorry, but are they going to baby himt ill he gets married, has kids and they die?? he needs to tell them to **** off, especially if he hasnt given them reason to not trust him.

Answer 5

general_reven is right Jeff.
As a friend,we often let ourselves get caught up in certain situations,but we can only do so much.He needs to man up and talk to his parents by letting them know that he a grown man and they need to let him live his live.And you as a friend,be there for him when frustrations takes over.

Answer 6

your friend is 20 years old either he man up about it or just stay as a little boy. as a friend I wouldn't get involed in the situation just be there for him hope this helps