How young is too young to talk to a child about sexuality?

Question

Several incidents happened with my child that may make her sexuality questionable.

I am not judging her, she's only seven and I don't know what to do as far as figuring out to talk to her about her feelings. She don't ask questions or explain how she feels about anything. I try to talk to her but she never knows how she feels. Maybe she's not there yet maturity wise.

Answer 1

There are age appropriate sex talks that should be said to children of all ages, from toddler up. Here's a place to start.

Google something like this: age appropriate sex talks for more web sites and information. As usual, you will have to vet each site to see if you think it is appropriate for your child.

Answer 2

I think that the best answer for this is whenever you child asks you the questions. Make your answers truthfull and age appropriate and at a level where they will be able to understand and not get scared. my daughter is 7 and started asking the questions about 5. More like how ddo babies get into their mummy's tummies? That sort of thing.

I think that sex and sexuality go hand in hand. Depending on how you feel about everything will determine how and what you will be able to say

Books i cant recommend them enough. I have a few that are within reach of her and she can get them down and we talk about it when ever she wants too.

I also told my daughter that its a "big girl" seceret. That its only between me and her. Ive made it a special time where we can talk about anything no matter how silly it may be, just to get here in the habbit of being able to talk to me about anything.

I just keep thinking that shes not going to be a kid for ever and that she has a right to know what will happen with her body, and also not to be ashamed of anything.

Also remember that while children may only have you at the moment to ask this stuff it wont always be the way. There is what they learn at school, other famikly members and friends as well as the media too

Answer 3

Sit down with her and simply ask. If you need a good lead in, try something like
"Sweetie, I'm not sure we covered this but, if there should come a time when you feel that being closer to a boyfriend may go too far, I want you to feel comfortable to come to me first so we can discuss somethings to protect you from consequences that could change your life severely."
If they're 10 to 13, they need serious counseling because it's from more serious issues.
If they are older than that, get to talking.
But you really ought to understand that some studies indicate that what we as parents consider as sexual activity and what our children consider as s.a. could be very different things. An example would be (and this is from a magazine I read in my doctors office on having a talk about what is considered sexual activity.) they are misinformed that oral isn't really sex because IT isn't put anywhere that can get them pregnant. The same applies to just touching. I'm sorry to be graffic. It's the way kids rationalize what is ok without breaking the rules.
As I told my kids from the beginning when we had the talk. I'm not giving you permission to go out and have sex, I just don't want you to make a mistake you'll have to pay for for the rest of your life. I took them to the mall and we pointed out examples of being tied down or what kinds of things they can goodbye to with one mistake. The hardest part of having these talks and have them often, is you have to swallow your first reaction and be calm. Point out by example what is at stake by being what my Mom called a loose girl. Point out friends they know who are in trouble.
I tell you, My youngest is 18 and my oldest is 21, I am not a grandma yet.

Answer 4

When the questions start coming then it's time to answer; honestly. Our son is 9 and hasn't asked too many questions yet, but when he has, we've been honest. Depends on the situation...example: if a child has been sexually abused I would think they would ask MORE questions (not all). If someone is asking THEM questions then they're coming to you for answers. One of my first answers would have to be, "where did you hear/talk about this?" - just to be safe.
Final note: honesty is best with kids. However you don't have to go into details...this questions depends on AGE of child for a detailed description of sexual education.

Answer 5

I think as soon as they start asking questions. Usually by the time they're five they've become curious about their bodies or where babies come from. When they ask, you should be straightforward and honest. Don't lead them on with stories like babies are brought by storks etc..That doesn't mean you need to explain everything though. Like a discussion about their private parts doesn't need to contain the whole sex talk when they're 4. Before they hit puberty you should have a frank sex talk before they learn about it from their friends.

Answer 6

Who cares about her sexuality? Nothing is wrong w/ being homo or hetro. But if you're wondering.....


The sooner, the better. I had a friend in 3rd grade who had sex w/ a sixteen-year-old because when she asked her mom about it, her mom said "later, honey. You'lll find out someday."

I would give them the basics at 5, then awnser their questions (any and all) from there out.

Answer 7

Whenever they ask is when you should answer their questions. Some children are more curious at an earlier age, others are not interested until they are older. In either case, answer openly, honestly without getting into specifics, most children want quick and concise answers.

Answer 8

It's never too early.
Just keep your information simple, and make sure you answer her questions exactly.

If you talk with her about it early and often, you'll be able to talk about the mechanics, etc., when she's younger, and have more nuanced talks about your values and concerns as she grows.

Answer 9

i think that the best time is now..

make it words that they understand and have answers for them if they ask questions (most will after they get over the fact that mom and dad had sex lol)

Answer 10

i would say start when it seems like a good time. and with what your saying it seems like a good time to ask her some questions and explain some things to her.