one of my close friends is married but is starting to fall for a guy she barely knows. She would never let this guy know because she has no future plans of leaving her husband that she loves dearly. She is never alone with this guy but he keeps telling her things that she loves to hear (knowing she is married) and it just keeps making her fall more and more in love. She would never give him the satisfaction of him knowing the effect he has on her. Another thing... he is unavoidable and she crosses paths with him daily... anyone have any advice?
2007-10-31 15:28:02 · 11 answers · asked by Y!A P0int5 Wh0r3 5 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
And no she isn't me :)
2007-10-31 15:33:52 · update #1
Lust doesn't mean you have to act on it. Personally I like the feelings of attraction I have for some of my friends. I know I would never act on them. There is not a shadow of a doubt. But it's kind of fun walking that thin line between plain old niceness and flirtiness, especially with straight men.
I would tell her to enjoy her feelings. Just keep it in her pants suit.
2007-10-31 15:33:13 · answer #1 · answered by Acorn 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he is truly unavoidable, and she must cross paths with him daily. Most women will keep their husband coming up in a conversation as much as possable for a "Verbal wall of protection" from unwanted advances. A good friend might bring that up in a talk with her, to help point her in the right direction.
2007-10-31 15:58:30 · answer #2 · answered by Solo 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Oh, my dear princess, it sounds like your friend is in quite the pickle.
Well first, I would strongly discourage her from pursuing extra marital affairs, and if this fellow were to express his desire for her even though he knows she's married, then he is surely a cad.
And yet, I find that my own hipocracy tingles when I give you this advice.
You see . . . I too have a freind . . .
My friend, he always played his life on the straight and narrow. He goes to work, pays the rent, feeds the dog. But recently, he has fallen under the spell of a married woman.
He did not mean to fall in love at first, but never before in his life had he fallen for someone purely based on her personality, her wit, and her intellect (and something she mentioned about her physical endowment which I don't entirely recall at the moment).
He knew he wanted to be the one to take care of her needs, even if it is only from a distance. When she feels worried about something, he wants to make her feel better, when she is curious about something, he wants to find her the answer.
Before he knew it, he was in love. Yesterday, I saw him picking the pepperoni off of his pizza because SHE is a vegetarian so now HE wants to be one too (although today he totally forgot and ate cold cuts on his sandwich for lunch).
My point is... love is precarious, you don't choose it, it chooses you.
I've obviously never met your friend, but for this guy to be so smitten with her, she must be wonderful. I imagine that she is kind with a beautiful aura that lights up the spirits of every room she enters. I imagine that she is a giver, that she gives of herself to all of her friends, always willing to help anyone, and yet, in those quiet moments when she truly needs help herself, she finds that she is alone.
That's when my friend wants to be there for this gal. He wants to hold her and reassure her it will be alright.
He wants to hug her and say, "There, there my sweet, although I do not know what chaos tomorow will bring, I will promise you that you will not face them alone."
So I guess my advice to your friend is...
She should TOTALLY hook up with this guy!! He sounds perfect for her. Come on, her husband will never know. She should hook, hook, HOOK it up!!
I hope that helps your friend. Anyway, how was your day? Did you get a lot of trick or treaters?
2007-10-31 22:42:32 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This story, about my friend :
After his marriage, a girl called him once. She called him for a date and kept changing dates saying sweet nothing. After many days of cooing she finally fixed it. He on the other hand shared it with his friends and wife! He went at the appointed time and place but did not find Her after office hour. On reaching home he found his wife and her friend waiting. Wife's friend said "you are still a good Husband even though U couldn't meet HER as I am here".
That was a nice test for the Best!
2007-11-01 06:48:46 · answer #4 · answered by Moni 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She needs to tell this guy and make it real clear to him that she is married! And that she really loves her husband and is commited to him only. She need to draw the line with him. Maybe if offering a friendship works, if not, she needs to say sorry this can't continue this anymore. Or cut conversation short with him.
Most important pray about... She needs to pray for help, especially about being faithful and pray for this guy to back off.
2007-10-31 16:52:32 · answer #5 · answered by gg 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her to consider ;
Everyone is tempted at various times to cheat. But they don't have to act on it, just resist it.
This man is NOT her friend, and he doesn't have her best interests at heart
This guy is NOT a nice person. He is a villan who wishes to lure her into a fling with him for his own pleasure only.
The next time he begins his sick little games, she should remember that he is a selfish rogue, and blow him off in no uncertain terms.
If she is a Christian, she needs to tell God everything and ask for strenth, guidance, and that she will be shown the real truth to what is happening.
2007-10-31 15:42:42 · answer #6 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her to stay strong, she knows that what she is hearing is leading her to think that she is in love. It is hard to stay true, but the man she is married to loves her more than she realizes....
2007-10-31 15:31:41 · answer #7 · answered by lynjen31 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Do you actually think that he doesn't know exactly what he is doing?
Love and blessings Don
2007-10-31 15:38:27 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your friend is a gullible bimbo, no known cure.
2007-10-31 15:32:17 · answer #9 · answered by Beavis Christ AM 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She's flirting with temptation - tell her to 'look out'!
2007-10-31 15:32:55 · answer #10 · answered by Robert S 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋