okay this is kind of embarassing but here goes. Im 21, Im not a virgin, but still, im terrified to have sex. I havent had a boyfriend since I was in high school, because I cant stand to be held, or kiss, or makeout, I start to panic and make them stop, so then they think I dont like them..it just really sucks. The few times that I had sex, I cried the whole time and made them stop. It just doesnt seem worth it, its not just a bad experience, its like hell, and I end up hating myself for weeks afterwards. WHY, am I like this? I feel like such a loser, I dont want to be alone for the rest of my life, and its hard to watch everyone around me be in a relationship. Guys dont understand how someone that isnt a virgin wont have sex. My friends always talk about sex, its so uncomfortable because they will be like, oh I havent had it in a while, im going crazy, you know? but no I really dont, Ive never had any sort of desire, ever. Is there something wrong with me?
2007-10-31 08:26:00 · 3 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
There is nothing wrong. You just have not met the right guy. Although your fear of touching etc is a little outside the average, it isn't anything to worry about. You need to wait until you meet a guy who is gentle and understanding. Tell people up front how you are. But you do have a right to be you, and this is part of you. Love and understanding will make most of this go away after a while.
2007-10-31 08:30:50 · answer #1 · answered by ? 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey, you're not required to claim enjoyment of anything that you're not completely comfortable with. If the sex you had wasn't good, that you're not interested at this point....that has little to do with you and more to do with whoever you first slept with. You could simply be thinking "well that wasn't all it's cracked up to be"...and you choose not go there right now. Having little or no desire can mean a whole bunch of things. Perhaps, you're simply not where the other girls you know are at sexually. I think this desire will come when you see or meet the right person. Who knows, maybe you're completely looking at the wrong gender?? I wouldn't worry about it, other than making sure that peer pressure doesn't get the best of you, and put you in "wrong" situations. I'm a guy, and I get indifferent about sex from time to time and I don't think there's anything wrong with feeling that way. Good Luck, stay safe and furthermore...BE YOURSELF!!! D'n'D
2007-10-31 08:38:05 · answer #2 · answered by DESPERATELY SEEKING SANITY!!! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This sounds sad. Since you don't like to be held..touched or kissed and it makes you cry have you ever stopped to think that maybe...maybe something happened to you as a child and you have blocked it out? I know that sounds off the wall but think really hard about when this all started. I'm sorry that you cry during sex but this is what I first thought of.
2007-10-31 08:31:55 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋