but absolutely no job interests me whatsoever besides being a mother (i plan to foster and adopt as well) and homemaker. even now though i'm only 16, have had years of experience with kids of all ages, and love to clean house and organize, and also cook, and do laundry. my mom doesn't want me to go to college to just get a standard degree in nothing, she says it's a waste of money. so what do i do?
2007-10-31 07:40:58 · 61 answers · asked by :) 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
Have you considered working on a degree until the time comes for you to actually be a mother and wife? When you graduate from high school, you'll only be 18. You have some years to wait until you find Mr. Right and start a family. That being the case, what will you do in the meantime? Earning a degree would be a great idea because it will keep you busy, teach you something new, teach you about life in general, and it might even be a great way to meet an educated man. After all, if you want to have lots of kids AND stay home, you'll need a husband who makes a substantial income in order for you to do this.
Then, once kids come along, you can be the stay-at-home mom you want to be. And you'll have a degree in your back pocket that might serve you again in the future.
I can understand your father's point of view. As a parent, one of the best things you can give your daughter, is an education. It will make her strong and self-reliant. You don't want to ever depend on a man 100% percent, no matter how much you love him or he loves you. Keep an open mind.
2007-10-31 08:02:02 · answer #1 · answered by Keep on Truckin' 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It's good to get a college degree. The ideal situation for you it sounds is to get married, have a husband that can and will support the family while you stay at home. I think that's wonderful, but not always going to happen due to unplanned circumstances. Be sure, even with your love of kids, to get married before having a baby (You should wait until you're married to have sex. Even with "protection" abstinence is still the only 100% protection) Even if you don't go to college, get married. But what happens if your husbands got a good job and loses it for any reason? If you have a degree you can go to work for more than minimum wage waitressing to help get the family through until hubby gets a new job. If you really don't want to go to college, be sure now to work your way up. I started out as a grocery store clerk, then a teller at a bank, then I worked in accounting, then became the assistant manager of a store. I have enough experience to help me get a job if I ever need to go back to work. This is advice coming from a stay at home mom who didn't go to college.
2007-10-31 11:34:31 · answer #2 · answered by serenityw2004 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should definitely go to college and get a degree so you have something to fall back on should you ever NEED to work someday. Your goals are wonderful, but unexpected things can always happen and someday you may find your self having to get a job. Wouldn't you rather be able to get a job in an actual profession rather than at some low-paying job like McDonald's, etc.? It's better to be safe than sorry. Maybe you should consider getting a degree in Family & Consumer Sciences, which would go right along with your interests and desires. It would also help you to be a better homemaker and mother.
2007-10-31 07:57:32 · answer #3 · answered by Amy B 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go to college for children's studies or something like that. Early Childhood Development. This will give you the degree to fall back on (in case you aren't married forever with a solid income) you can get a job at a daycare or as a teacher eventually. You can never have too much knowledge! It may even help you when you have kids of your own and it will look good to foster/adoption agencies that you care enough about your future and that of your potential children to get an education and learn what is best for them! Good luck!
2007-10-31 10:35:12 · answer #4 · answered by mama shannon 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Being a stay at home mom would be just about every mothers dream (not all, but most). I have to say though, your dream is a little irresponsible. Your father is right, you need to go to college. Wouldn't you want the best for your children? Being an educated parent would be much better then an uneducated mother. Who is to say that you will be financially able to stay at home as well? Rich men do not necessarily come looking for a high school graduate waiting to be a stay at home mom. You are young. Take your time, go to college, get married, and then if finances permit, become a stay at home mom. You don't want to have children and then realize that you should have gone to school first - it's a lot harder to go to school, work and have children.
2007-10-31 07:49:21 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
First, I think 16 is a little young to be daydreaming about a family, however I think it's admirable that you are giving some thought to your future. There is no garuantee that you will marry and have children, and ABSOLUTELY no garuantee that you will find a man that will stick by you to be a good family man and be your only means of support. I am a believer that an education is your best defense against dependency on others....please remember that the only person you can TRULY rely on is YOURSELF in this world! Don't learn that lesson the hard way, I beg you! Having said that, I think you should concentrate on finding your strengths, weaknesses, and talents (non-child related) and find a way to earn money doing what you love once you leave school. Dream big, plan big, and please focus on becoming a whole and well rounded person before you saddle yourself in with kids and family. You are unique in enjoying housework and looking forward to doing laundry and cleaning house for the rest of your life but this is a great big world and I hope you will explore it before making any decisions. Good luck!
2007-10-31 07:47:29 · answer #6 · answered by Marina 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Go to college and get a degree in teaching or child care so that it will be in something that you like to do anyway. A degree is a great accomplishment whether you end up using it or not. Don't you want your future children to have a mother that they respect and aspire to be like? What if you were to get married and have lots of children and your husband were to die, become sick/disabled, or divorces you? I know those are not things you want to think about but it happens to women all the time. I think it would be nice for your self esteem to be able to know that you could care for your family in the absence of a husband. Many women get college degrees and become stay at home wives.
The advantage of going to college is that you might be able to find that perfect hubby that wants to support you and take care of you. Keep your options open. No one is telling you not to become a stay at home wife and mother. You can still do that.
What were you planning on doing after high school graduation? Do you already have a potential husband in mind? Do you know for sure that he can support you and an family? If you don't have that already what would it hurt for you to be in college until that person comes along for you?
2007-10-31 07:54:02 · answer #7 · answered by Junebaby 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Honestly some women just want to be SAHM's. I know my sister tried the college thing right out of highschool never liked it, didnt really have any interests that she wanted to pursue a degree in so she ended up dropping out after her 1st or 2nd semester. She never really liked to work either, she never liked any job she had, so she'd always end up quitting them after not being there for very long. She is now happily married to someone in the Air Force, has 2 girls and enjoys being a SAHM.
I on the other hand went to college for 3 years, before I couldnt afford it anymore, joined the military, got married am 10 classes away from finishing my Bachelors, have a baby on the way, and I will go back to work once the baby is born. Everyone is different.
Your parents just want the best for you, but only you can know what you want to do for the rest of your life.. You honestly have atleast a few more years to decide what you want to do, your only 16 you dont have to make a huge life altering decision right now, but if you do end up choosing to be a SAHM your parents may be upset and disappointed at first but they will ultimately still love you in whatever decision you decide. And you never know you could decide you want to go to college after all, 5-10 years down the road. Good luck!
2007-10-31 07:53:16 · answer #8 · answered by Sharpie211 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all, as you have stated.. You are only 16. You will change your mind a few more times about what you really want to do. The whole purpose for college is to go and take different classes in many different subjects so that you can see what you like and what interests you. You like all those things now because you don't have to do them. I'm sure your parents are okay if you don't do the laundry, or you don't watch "other" peoples children. Whole new ball game when you HAVE to do it. Again your still young. You have time to think on it.
2007-10-31 07:49:27 · answer #9 · answered by cupcakes519@att.net 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I find it really great that you feel like you want to be a stay at home mom. However, I do agree with your dad on obtaining a college education for several reasons:
1. You have to prepare for worst case scenarios. Divorces are extremely common in our society and if 15 years down the road things don't work out with your husband you want to be able to get a decent job that will help you maintain your family (child care wont pay for everything). Without a degree you may end up as a receptionist who usually doesn't get enough to survive with a family.
2.Being an example for your kids (specially the girls). Once your future kids grow up they will go through the same period that you are going through right now. If your kids see that both of their parents went to college, then they are more likely to want to succeed as much as you two did. Also, it is a great exmaple for the girls to see that their mom got a degree and still decided to be a stay at home mom. You have the brains, but still choose them.
3. You might learn how to be prepare to be a mom. There are a lot classes and majors out there that can teach you about kids minds, how to deal with stress, crafts, etc. Elemtary school teaching may be a great major for you.
4. For the rough times. Economies jump up and down... if your family runs into financial issues (lay offs, mortgage payments, high credit card debt, medical emergencies, etc) is good for you to be able to get a job quick and trust me if you don't have a degree things are just MORE difficult.
5. You may meet your future husband in college. Where else will you meet a good man that will be wealthy enough to support a family of at least 4? He obviously needs to have a good job but in order to that he needs a college degree.
So go to college... get a degree... you never know where life may take you but you can surely be ready!
2007-10-31 07:59:08 · answer #10 · answered by gserrado 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋