Hey there!
The HTB and I are planning our wedding in Hawaii. We live in California. Because it's a "destination" wedding, we're thinking of only inviting those people that we know will come, like family and close friends.
We plan on having a big reception back home with everyone who couldn't make it to Hawaii. We'll have a video from the wedding playing sometime during the reception (haven't decided when yet).
How would we word this on the invitation? Should we invite everyone to prevent hard feelings, and just assume they won't be able to make it anyways? Would you feel like it was rude to not be invited to the ceremony and only to the reception?
I definitely do NOT want to be a Bridezilla and do NOT want to hurt anyone's feelings. Thanks for your input :)
2007-10-31 07:36:24 · 6 answers · asked by kiki 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
That's a tough one, because of the potential of mixed feelings.
IF I were you, I would send everyone an invitation.
I would state "due to the ceremony being held in Hawaii, we understand that not everyone can attend due to their busy schedules, though we would adore it if you could. We WILL be having a reception on XXXXXXXXXX at XXXXXXXXXX, and will show video of the wedding ceremony there, so please, if you cannot attend the wedding, PLEASE attend the reception!!!"
2007-10-31 07:45:07 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's perfectly fine to have an intimate wedding, especially when it is a destination wedding. Since you're planning a larger celebration at home, just keep the Hawaii guest list to family/close friends.
If you invite everyone to Hawaii, you'll probably get some people you didn't count on. So, will they come to the reception in California, too? It gets confusing. Don't put the pressure on them to choose one or both!
The invitation to the reception in California should just say, "Celebrate the marriage of..." see link for various ideas. No one will be offended.
2007-10-31 08:11:56 · answer #2 · answered by eli_star 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is how my husband and I did this very same thing. We called and invited the people we wanted most at our wedding. Since we married in Reno, and we live in Texas, we took care of the airfare for those we invited. (There was a total of 6). After we returned, we threw a big reception at our house. Invited everyone we knew. And their friends. We stated "no gifts" on the invite. This I think prevented anyone from feeling like they "had" to bring a gift and no one seemed to mind that they had not been invited to the wedding. And we still received a ton of stuff. I felt our friends appreciated and enjoyed the fact that we invited them to celebrate our marriage without the ususal formal wedding, showers, rehersal dinner and mandatory gifts. I feel that most guests would rather go to the reception than the wedding anyway. Don't think will hurt anyones feelings at all. Good Luck and Congrats!
2007-10-31 07:57:09 · answer #3 · answered by Paint Pony 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A friend of mine got married in Hawaii years ago. She was a travel agent and sent out invitations asking who all wanted to attend. When she got an approximate count, she contacted tour companies (like Pleasant Hawaiian) to get group discounts on air fare and accomodations.
Everyone from San Diego flew over on the same flight. All of the guests ended up in a cool little condo complex right on the beach in Kaanapali. The wedding couple stayed in a very nice resort-style hotel in Kihei. They had the wedding under a gazebo overlooking the ocean at their hotel. The reception was then held on a big lanai they had for such occasions.
We ended up staying there for about a week. It was really fun and I think about 30 people ended up going.
Don't worry about offending someone who can't or doesn't want to go. It's your wedding. It's up to the guests to decide whether they want to take a trip to Hawaii for a few days. And, they would really appreciate if you put some kind of package deal together for them. We did.
2007-10-31 09:40:24 · answer #4 · answered by Paul in San Diego 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I also want a destination wedding, CONGRATS!!! I think you should just send invites to everyone, you know that many wont show up but I would announce in the invite that the reception will be held at...... that way everyone knows that if they cant afford to come to the wedding they will be part of the reception.
2007-10-31 07:48:06 · answer #5 · answered by Kiki from K-town 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
My husband and I were married on the island of St. Lucia, and we dealt with the same issues on whom to invite. Only our closest family members attended (parents, siblings, grandparents, and both of our favorite aunts) We made it known that we wanted a very intimate ceremony, a private affair. Then we came back and had a big party. There were no hard feelings by anyone, and they were happy just to be a part of the celebration. Only send out invites to those whom you want to attend the ceremony. Make a seperate invitation for your reception guests. If anyone asks, just be polite and gracious. It is your day, not theirs, and you shouldn't have to explain yourself to anyone who doesn't understand
2007-10-31 07:51:54 · answer #6 · answered by lee's girl 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋