i have 2 extremely close friends. one is goin through a very difficult time. the guy she loved is gettin married in a week's time. final exams are goin on & she's ruinin them. she cannot stop thinkin about it because this guy's house is right in front of her house and she knows every activity that takes place there. we've tried our best to convince her, her tears don't stop, she doesn't stuy either. i'm concerned, pls help.. thanks in advance..
2007-10-30 19:12:08 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
theres MANY fish in the sea - & although she likes this one so much he obviously doesnt feel the same way - its the cold hard truth - so do stuf to keep her mind off it ?& hopefuly hse will stop being a drama queen - encourage her to study & if she doesmnt its really her loss & shes just cheating herself - you can't force her to do anything she's a big girl & tell her to stop snooping on the neighbours !
2007-10-30 19:17:30 · answer #1 · answered by Tara M 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is a really tough one, She has a broken heart. I remember going through exactly the same thing. I didn't have exams on though. I used to be with this guy and we were gonna get married and have Children, we were so in love, he was my first love. Then we broke up, he started liking someone else, fell in love with her and married her like six months later. He lived right next to me. I couldn't stop crying for months the pain in my heart was unbearable I literally thought that I would die. I choked everytime I though of him. I just could not function. The only real cure is time i guess. No matter what you will say to her it won't help. I mean even if you reason with her and tell her she deserves better, she deserves someone that will love her for her, someone that will love her the way she loves him and all the rest, right now she is in pain, and only time will heal those wounds. She has to keep thinking about her future though with the exams, they are important and she will get through this time. I mean if he doesn't love her back then he does not deserve her. You and I probably know that but to try and make her see that right now will be very hard. I hope it will get better soon
2007-10-30 19:19:24 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best thing to do would be to get her out of the house for a while. Take her to one of your homes and form study groups. Find some other guy that she may have been slightly interested in and bring him to dinner or lunch, lightly though. Nothing so serious that she would be even more distracted. Every broken heart needs time to heal but just getting her away is 50% of the solution. Let her know that you understand her pain and would like to see her complete her studies for finals and after she has completed that task, then she will have time to grieve. There is no true way to stop the pains of the heart except allow them to fester and finally go out.
2007-10-30 19:19:01 · answer #3 · answered by Wizz 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have her come and stay with you so she doesn't have to look at the house all day. She needs to know there are plenty of guys out there that would die for her affection, this guy is moving on so should she. relationships end for a reason, theirs did and it's for the better. When people look back at fond memories they always forget about the crap the other person put them through. Tell her to get through this and after the exams you'll all go out and celebrate him being out of her life for good, so she can finally end it in her mind.
2007-10-30 19:20:14 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Has she or one of her friends spoken with the guy? Perhaps out of respect, he could have less activities at his home.
Another option is to have her taken away by a friend to stay until after the wedding is over and he moves out with his bride.
You and the rest of this girl's friends need to surround her with love and activities to occupy her mind away from the festivities of the wedding and toward making a life for herself doing things she loves. In time she will find someone who is right for and cares about her. In the meantime, one must enjoy what life brings.
There is more than one fish in the sea.
2007-10-30 19:19:04 · answer #5 · answered by Princess Picalilly 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Can she move away for a short time ? Stay with a friend is a good idea, just for a few weeks, until the wedding and exams are over. Another answer is to get her another boy friend !
2007-10-30 19:23:45 · answer #6 · answered by dreamer 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you can't help in a situation the best thing to do is mind your own business. You cannot alter her feelings just stay focused on what is in front of you and be there to console her when she is ready to move forward. Seriously, you will never be able to control or alter another person's emotional state. That's very freeing if you think about it because then no matter how wacky they make themselves you will be able to maintain your dignity knowing "it's on them."
2007-10-30 19:17:29 · answer #7 · answered by QueenBean 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What good does worrying do? It's just a waste of time. Best advice is to move on with her life. If she's into Christ have her read the Book of John. It can work wonders.
2007-10-30 19:17:16 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try taking her on a mini vacation,anything that can get her out of the house and away from that situation for awhile.Be supportive and kind ,just get her away from that house so she won't have to see what is going on with her ex.
2007-10-30 19:21:39 · answer #9 · answered by demonfirelife 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There's really NOT that much you can DO- other than to "Be There" for her, & try to keep her away from home until AFTER her Exams... Maybe she can Study over at Your house or something- to take mind off of Him...
2007-10-30 19:19:02 · answer #10 · answered by Joseph, II 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋