Why do wives get jealous over infidelity but not when the husband is sexually abusing his step daughter?

Question

It seems like they just don't care when that happens. I can't put the two together.

I'm not refering to a particular case, I've just heard occasional stories about abuse by a step father and the mother slapping the child across the face for telling about it. She might scream "I'm HAPPY now, if you don't like it then YOU get out!!!" or just bury her head in the sand. Often the kid runs away or just grow up screwed up. I'm just wondering how such mothers can ignore so much, not even feel jelous. I haven't heard about any heroic mothers over this issue, but do hear about divorces over normal infidelity. How is it that jealousy is sometimes there and sometimes not?

Answer 1

Wives do get jealous it's just expressed differently because it's a different type of abuse. I was abused from ages 4 -12 and my mother treated me like dirt. I found out years later she knew I was being abused, which explains why she hated me. After ALOT of counseling my mother admitted that she had viewed me as "the other woman". Obviously they got divorced but maybe if I hadn't been in the picture she wouldn't have been cheated on. TOTALLY BACKWARDS, I know but that doesn't make it any more true. She now has the correct prospective and we could not be closer.

**Most wives know that the husband cannot run off and marry the daughter either so the threat is not as great to them.

All situations are different but I hope this helps you understand a little better. I doubt anyone will fully understand that kind of thinking.

Answer 2

what? I wish you would put more detail because this question could potentially be interesting. I agree with you, it dosent make sense in any form. Sexual abuse is such a hard thing to reason with because its a very uncomfortable topic. Whoever the d-bag you are talking about that is sexually abusing his step daughter needs to get his penis chopped off. Women honestly...some..not all because im a women and i wouldnt be okay with it but some Women care alot about themselves. I dont really know why a women wouldnt be jelous or upset if this happened. She'd have to be very heartless.

Answer 3

I know someone that this happened to. The mother does not want to believe that he wants her child over her. Some just ignore it and then take it out on the kid because they would rather put up with it than to be alone. The person that I know that did this would take the other kids and leave but not take the abused one. She would be left home alone with him and no one to help her. The mother hated the girl and was physically abusive to her. Do not know why she never stopped it. Later she denied knowing that it was going on. This was my grandmother. (the mother)

Answer 4

I agree 100% with lilmomma86! I would not condone infidelity of anykind with anyone and if there was sexual abuse of any sort at the hands of my husband he would regret the day that his mother gave birth to him. I would mess him up so bad that he would be unrecognizable. Where did you get this question? I have heard of women standing by their husband's side after the husband had been accused of sexual misconduct with a child or grandchild. It sickens me and makes me wanna puke. Thank God above that I have a good man, that is all I can say about this one!

Answer 5

They don't get jealous because they REFUSE to believe it..... My Uncle was abusing both his daughters from the time they were little. My cousin told me about her "Daddy" touching her...I think I was 7 or 8 at the time.........I went and told my Aunt and she yelled at me to not make up lies. Then I told my Mother and she yelled at me and told me to never say such a thing.......Years later..... the girls were in their 20's they finally got divorced.....My Aunts ex husband abused his new wifes daughter and ended up in jail......they finally realized I was telling them the truth....now, one Daughter is so screwed up she's been a prostitute after getting married 6 times, the other daughter killed herself. They could of avoided all this if my Aunt would have just opened her eyes.

Answer 6

many times they are in denial. They do not want to see what is happening. It is the end of the family and the destruction of a daughter. And sadly many women chose the man and blame the child. Both should be shot! and the child saved...somehow. It isnt easy.

Answer 7

i can't even get the point of why you're comparing the two totally different situations...the husband's infidelity comes with the consent of the other woman involved, meaning the two parties cooperate...sexual abuse is abusers' forceful self gratification towards his victim.. Mothers/wives aren't stupid to get jealous over sexual abuse of her daughter...

Answer 8

Whoa, this is a really ugly question. Most women I know around here would definitily take the scumbag out back and well you know the rest. if I was there I'd help the women do it too.
guys like that should be taken out into the ocean and given cement overshoes.

Answer 9

what!? a mother should never be jealous if any man sexually abuses her child, she should be outraged!! only someone with a mental defect would be jealous because their daughter was abused, it's called abuse for a reason!

Answer 10

Name one woman that wouldn't "CARE" when her husband is sexually abusing her daughter and I'll show you a crack whore so strung out she doesn't know which end is up. No sane, normal, parent would ever not care about any kind of abuse happening to their child.