why does a man who gets married, all of a sudden believe he is ruler and can tell his wife what to do , wear, where to go, ect?
2007-10-30 15:35:46 · 15 answers · asked by catsangel777 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I have yet to figure this one out myself.. I do believe that it is a power trip thing.. Their masculinity.. But you know what you have to stand your ground and let them know who is boss that we are in the millennium not the 50's good luck!!!!
2007-10-30 15:50:52 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The domination, taken in its mildest form is just his way of making you his; solidifying your relationship. You are married, you belong to each other!! He might be feeling insecure about the fact the you know now that he isn't perfect or that he isn't completely desirable. Keep being you and talk about what problems you are having. Just don't spend an evening telling him what he has done wrong! Tell him what you are feeling and ask him to talk to you about specific instances you or he were worried about. Not talking will be the death of your relationship.
I hope you know that you never should tollerate any abuse of any form!!!
Make sure that you are acting like a married woman and being devoted to him. Remind him that you know what he found attractive in your appearance and that you don't want him to stop being proud and turned on. THAT is why you dress the way you do (I hope)... to make you feel happy about yourself and so that he will be proud of you!!
You didn't give many details but, your social life should involve your husband in ALL cases unless you talk with him about it in advance. The same rule should apply to him. You aren't dating anymore. But, it IS heathly for you to have time with your friends socially!! You are starting a family. It is just the two of you, I hope, There should be conversations about girls night out and guys night out if that is important to you. Dress sexy for him and dress down a little when you go out with the girls. That will make him feel better. And you probably should do it anyway!! You aren't shopping for men anymore! Give him reasons to trust you and your relationship and expect the same from him!!
You are probably doing better than you think. Don't let the begining ruin the process!! Be smart and sweet and don't ever, EVER be a doormat!!
2007-10-30 23:36:10 · answer #2 · answered by Shannon C 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK. That is not a man. Marriage is a compromise of two equal partners. Not one dominant person. Try talking to him. And if that does not work do you really want to see yourself Marie to someone like that. Five years from now. Or if you have kids. You want someone that will see you as a equal and makes sure to always consider your opinion. You are your own person. You decide what you wear and where to go. Even if your marry it is not his. So I hope you can come to a compromise or you kick him to the curve. I hope you find your answer and are happy.
2007-10-30 23:17:02 · answer #3 · answered by Ms.Sammantha 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
some men just think that they always have to be in control. Some father's raise their son's to think that they have to control the woman or she will take over and the man will be considered a punk. Some men go to far and try to control their wives evry move. These men have serious problems and need to seek help. No woman should allow a man to control her. A marriage should be 50/50 .
2007-10-30 22:44:38 · answer #4 · answered by luvcaramel 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some guys take their role a little too serious when they say "take care of the wife' he is the head of the household, and yes, us woman should be behind them... as they say.. behind a great man there is a smart woman. You have to obselve a little of what is happening.. is it because he is taking his role to serious? or is it some kind of jelousy? is he telling you to stop wearing that because you are disrespecting him in the way you dress or what is the reason behind it....
2007-10-30 23:04:59 · answer #5 · answered by Ale 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's even more appalling when women sit there and take it, they don't do anything, go anywhere or make any decisions without having to talk to their husband first. In my situation, most of my friends and I are Army wives and most of our husbands are overseas. I know this woman who can't leave her house for anything because she has to wait for her husband to call or else he'll go crazy, and any money she spends, he has to give her permission first, she doesn't even have a cell phone because he felt she didn't need that, and to me that's just another way to control her, but she doesn't seem to see like it that, so I stopped giving her advice and only listen.
2007-10-30 22:46:12 · answer #6 · answered by ilovethe90s 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The Bible says a man is to be head of his household and his wife should obey him, but I would NEVER EVER marry a woman who did things or went places or dressed in ways I thought were wrong.
A man leads by example.If he isnt asking you to do something illegal or immoral will it hurt you to comply tomake the marriage strong?
I wouldnt want my wife wearing a thing bikini and hanging out with her ex b/f while im at work, that is reasonable, but if he wont let her go to the store, thats domineering.
2007-10-30 22:42:15 · answer #7 · answered by Joe F 7 · 1⤊ 3⤋
It's frequently the other way around as well. People sometimes assume different roles after they are married.
2007-10-30 22:38:53 · answer #8 · answered by Grick 4 · 4⤊ 0⤋
he thinks that you are representing him now. my husband wants me to dress up like him (a female version of him, hip-hop style and all) totally not my style. men wants to display their woman, be proud that he bagged someone other men should be jealous of.
about where to go, sometimes it's for our own safety reason, hey, it's a dangerous place out there, especially for women. but, sometimes, he doesn't want us to gossip around too much.
2007-10-30 22:48:56 · answer #9 · answered by natalia 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why are you staying with him??? this may be the first case I ever heard of a wife putting up with this! marriage is supposed to be fifty fifty, with NIETHER in charge!
2007-10-30 22:42:58 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋