Why are some women so jealous of me?

Question

I get this so often...
Women will straight out TELL me they are jealous, or they will do something that sends this message loud and clear. Well, i HEAR YOU, alright?!

Not ALL women are like this. Just ...a lot. And it's not ONLY about my looks, it's about my talents or gifts or professionalism. It's getting to the point where it's interfering with where I want to go in life, meaning it's overwhelming at times, meaning that I can't make any female friends because they're all too insecure with themselves to be able to have a reasonable conversation or go out shopping without some comment or sense that they feel threatened by my ...what...petite, toned body, natural blonde hair, clear skin, degree in counselling psych? How does one DEAL with this crap? Any ideas?

wow. so far the only one who has been helpful at all has been meagerod. peach pie, as a therapist i do know that porn addiction is not the fault of the woman. and he out of all men is attending a support group and wants to help other men with this addiction. You, peachy, are clearly one of the jealous.

Thank you in advance to any who have IDEAS in how to deal with this. unfortunately, just because i have a degree in psych does not mean i have ALL the answers to everything! :)

SO, here it is, MOST of you are reacting out of your own feelings of being threatened by a simple question. Only a FEW of you have actually given some real advice and not tried to attack me to make yourselves feel better. Nice. Congratulations to the few of you who aren't intimidated by this question.

Answer 1

Don't listen to the women here who immediately felt so insecure with themselves that they cannot even answer a question without throwing daggers.

It's difficult to go shopping with girlfriends when they feel too uncomfortable to let you take a turn. I have some one-way relationships too.

You are right that most of these women who respond are jealous..in essence, proving your point. only a couple of them are acutally being helpful.

I appreciate your honesty on this forum, and i'm not going to assume that you go around telling people how hot you are because that would be a stupid assumption. So my honest advice for you is to ignore these comments and instead draw strength from God instead of worrying about how others view you. It is so easy to get caught up in that kind of worrying. The world cares much about exalting petty things like outer beauty, education, being slim and blonde. Look at Hollywood!!

Most women really are jealous. YOU just have to turn your focus away from their jeering and towards things that are eternal, like your soul. God loves you because He made you.

You are loved.

Answer 2

I'm sorry this has been your experience. There's an old saying that we ATTRACT the people/experiences that are in our lives by what we put out to the universe.....If we put out arrogance or negativity, that is what we get back.
I've had only a few people actually TELL me they are jealous of me and my response is always the same: Why be jealous? Admire what others have, but don't hate them them for it. Gently thank them for the compliment and keep it moving.
About the friends issue, here has been my experience: Pretty women act differently around other pretty women than they do around average looking women. Some pretty women are like alley cats and the nails come out. And the fact that you appear to be in love with yourself, I'm sure that become apparent to them, which will make them like you even less. My advice to you is to TONE things down a bit and focus on qualities that form true relationships. Trust, honesty, kindness. These are the qualities that attract true friends.
Hope this helps.

Answer 3

I can't say exactly why women tend to be threatened by other women. I too tend to intimadate women I have no idea why or how. I am just being me. I am fun ,outgoing and smart.

What I have noticed is the ones that are jealous have insecurity issues of their own. There is really nothing that you can do to make it better becuase it is their issues. It also depends on what the jealous women are doing. Are they talking bad about you? Are they getting voilent? How do you know they are jealous?

If they are talking about you that is a simple fix. Just let them know that you are glad you can entertain them and if there is anything else you can do for their fun to let you know. That tends to stop the talking. If they are violent then you need legal help. Past that your choices are minamal. 1) Ignore them. 2) Try to befriend them, things tend to change once the time is taken to get to know each other. 3) Continue to let it bother you.

You may also be doing something that you are unaware of to make them feel that way. Are you always talking yourself up? Can you carry on a conversation about something other than yourself or something in your life? Maybe give them compliments about what you like in them. Everyone likes to be made to feel good. But you have to be sincere.

If this jealousy thing is having that much affect on your life then you need to step back and look at everything. Lokk at yourself, look at where you go, the people you talk to, the type of people you attract, and then maybe do something new. Try meeting people else where, try new activities, or maybe just spend time learning about yourself. There is always lots to learn.

Basically analyze your life and make changes you need to. That is the only way you are going to fix this. But you already know that, and it is OK to be scared or nervous.

Good luck. I hope I have helped a bit.

Answer 4

When i was in my twenties and thirties i had the same problem as you, I had only one female friend the rest were jealous and my male friends weren't aloud to be around me and could only talk to me if the girlfriends weren't there. I wasn't a conceited person i just took pride in what i wear and how i looked. I don't mean to sound rude but i see why some would come to the conclusion that you thought you were better. For instants the way you point out how your hair is natural blonde,clean skin,toned body and petite. It wasn't necessary to go into that much detail as to what or why people are jealous of you. Nothing wrong with being a little conceited in fact i think it's health. A lot of people just think it's being just a little to smug.
There are a lot of women here that haven't a clue to what your really saying. I can't believe out of all these women who answered your question none has never been around other women who were so jealous that they did not allow their boyfriends to even talk to you.

This is to all you women you all sound very jealous. You don't know this woman to talk to her so badly shame on you.

Answer 5

Please don't take this the wrong way - but do you think maybe you are projecting some air of superiority or arrogance?

It's understandable that you are confident about your looks & your achievements. Maybe you are just projecting really good self confidence - and women mistake that for "attitude."

I think the majority of women are insecure, so they are threatened by your confidence.

I doubt you will have much success finding female friends - unless they have just as much self confidence as you. They will always feel threatened by you. You can thank media & men for forcing women to feel worthless unless they are skinny, blond, and possess probably just about every quality you already do. So, yeah, I'm guessing that's one reason why you have trouble befriending women - they don't want to feel worthless next to you. It's a sad reality, but that's really how it is.

You will always been seen as competition I'm afraid. I wish women didn't have to experience these feelings. It's really a sad pathetic world, when women are forced to base their self-worth on their physical beauty, thus making enemies with anyone they perceive as being more attractive than they are.

Perhaps seek friends in women who enjoy the same things you do - working out, out door activities, biking, roller blading, running, whatever it may be. You may just have to try harder to make conversation & be friendly with women. Hopefully you have a great, warm personality - and can use that to warm up to some new friends. Some women don't care about physical beauty & competition, and would enjoy your friendship just for who you are.

Answer 6

I don't think you are being conceited or stuck up. This is a legitimate question to ask as it is very hard for someone with much talent and good looks to make many close female friends. I, myself, never have felt threatened by anyone who is more beautiful than I or more talented. I look at the person; not their outward beauty, but what is inside as that is what matters. I could easily be a friend of yours; it would not intimidate me at all or make me jealous that you may be prettier or have a better job than I. All of that is really meaningless in life; too bad many people judge others by it.

Answer 7

Holy crap! Is this question for real? First of all it doesn't sound like you really need friends considering you seem to enjoy your own company so much! Maybe when you are around other people you should not talk about how great you THINK you are. Maybe you are confusing jealousy with annoyance?!?! Could be these women aren't jealous of you but annoyed by your self loving attitude. It certainly isn't a barrell of fun being around someone who only talks about "ME ME MEEEEE!" Always remember that sometimes the most GORGEOUS person in the world can be grotesquely fugly as soon as they open their mouth if their inner beauty doesn't match their outer beauty. Cliche as it may sound, but beauty really is in the eye of the beholder and pretty is as pretty does. If you maintain your sense of superiority you will more than likely go through life asking this same exact question and you will remain alone with no friends. Something to ponder!!!

Answer 8

If what you are saying is true then my advise would be to try and tone it down, don't flaunt any of these great qualities.
When talking to other girls try and be humble and down to earth. I'm speaking from experience, as I have many great qualities but I have a way of making everyone feel comfortable and not threatened by me because I know I am not better then anyone else no matter what I have or how smart I am. In other words I don't judge people and they don't judge me.

Answer 9

The world mirrors what we need to learn most. We see in others what we dislike in ourselves. This is your lesson, not the lesson of others. Do you honestly believe that most women are jealous of you? Do you think people are putting that much thought into you? You deal with this crap by learning what makes you so insecure that you have to brag about your petite, toned body, natural blond hair, clear skin and degree. Honestly it comes off as sounding very shallow. I wouldn't be impressed if anyone described me that way at all. I would feel most proud of someone described me as loving and caring and easy to talk to. My physical appearance is the result of genetics and my education has nothing to do with how I treat others. Look at the mirror that is being presented to you and change what you see by changing yourself. Good luck :)

Answer 10

I'm not quite sure why you'd be asking your question here with a degree in psychology. Sounds like you gravitate towards insecure women in an effort to bolster your own self esteem. And if they TELL you that they're jealous of you, more than likely they're just paying you a flattering compliment. No need to get overwhelmed!