Myspace question for parents...?

Question

Hi, i'm 15 years old and I would apreciate it if any parents out there could take a look at my myspace profile and tell me if theres anything on it which you wouldnt like to see on your own daughters profile. I'm just a little concerened my parents might come across it and read something they dont like.

Thanks

http://www.myspace.com/demi66

Please read the comments that my friends have left at the bottom of the profile too (:

Answer 1

Hmmm... for the most part, it seems innocuous. I must say though, I don't know your parents and their concerns/paranoias and experiences so it's hard to judge how they would take it.

I can say unreservedly that they will not take anyone else's ringing endorsement as meaning anything at all should you press one of their buttons.

However, I would have several concerns were you my daughter. I will say first, before mentioning them, that I would not forbid the MySpace you have right now because of them as you have to live in a real world and you have to learn how to BEFORE you're 18 (well, 16, you're in England). And I'm certain you are as exposed already as this site makes you so its direct harm seems lessened.

First kind of objection is now I know you interest me and I can find you. (If I were a pervert looking to take action! And in England.) This arises from your giving your location several places including the easily searchable one in your basic data (the stuff that shows up by your pic). But also in a number of other places: Hometown, About Me, and so on. I know, I know, the links from other kids to your page will bring any perverts who couldn't search for you directly, but why make it super easy? Just take Telford out of the easily searched data. I also know it's not hard to limit Google or Yahoo to MySpace and find nearby town names on peoples' pages, but geez, make them work a bit!

Next, is it really fair to your friends who are linked to your page in numerous ways to include the town? For instance, "charl <3 kev :D" takes care to only put in "United Kingdom" but if I wanted her, I'd start looking in Telford. You see? It's not just risk to you, but to others as well. I know, other friends of yours risk her that way too, and she may not mind, but that's like saying kids hear swearing all the time, why should I keep it clean? Isn't it better to say kids hear swearing all the time, but they don't hear it from me? Besides, out of little bits are mighty dams built. If everyone started being slightly more cautious, it could make it safer for everyone. Slowly.

Then to your age. Yes, you did put 99 in there. Well, that's not too deceptive. 20 might have been, or 23 perhaps to stay out of searches for under-21's and such. But 99? No. I'd search for anything in the 90's or even above in a second once I'd gone through MySpace a bit. I'd suggest something more like 23.

Though a search in Google or Yahoo even, would turn up the idea of your sweet 16 birthday coming up... mmm... 15yo... oh my... says the pervert, thinking of looking around for you...

So that thought brings me to the next big suggestion: keep that stuff out of your general page. I understand the point of wanting an open page so strangers who might become friends can find you. But certain things are simply unsafe. Hmmm... if she's 15yo... yummy... so are the friends... (our pervert again — I'm gonna stop adding that each time, it'll add impact to the creepiness of the things said) Safe for everyone. By the way, when perverts spot the girls they're looking for, I wonder, do those girls ever have even younger girl siblings with them? Hmmm...

Safer for everyone, but then, how do you pass on fun/important/timely things like that and safely to boot? Your blog entries. They can be left open to the world or made private individually. Just title each one something like this: Friends: Blah-blah-blah or Everyone: Blah-blah-blah. Anyone, anyone at all, trying to read one of each will catch on very quickly. The ones with sensitive information get made private so only people on your friends list can read them and the open ones are, well, open. So you gush about the upcoming sweet 16th in a Friends: blog entry, and about a dufus boy you have a crush on in an Everyone: entry.

Sorry, some oh-so-hot boy!

Your pics are all in good taste. Perfectly proper, appropriate. I see nothing a parent should really object to. Lol, Summer Girl might catch their eyes a moment or two, but it's all cool. But I'd point out that a pervert perusing them would be spun up tighter by their innocence and lack of guile. Keeping them from the page at all is really the only answer to that. Or at least not helping them find you. By the way, before I forget, you seem like a very sensible, pretty, nice girl. Congratulate yourself and your parents sometime.

Finally, your friends comments. This is touchier than all the rest. See, the thing to avoid is having your folks, or your friends' folks, reading your page (that's right, it's your friends' parents too) and thinking this friend is a bad influence, this one, oh my, she is hailing drugs as the way to live, this boy thinks about nothing but sex, this kid is just foul-mouthed, etc. So, since they don't pop up there without you approving them to, just give some thought to each and now and then go through and delete some. In the same vein, your friends list, be sure it contains no one disturbing to your folks (um, like a 28yo male they don't know from Adam..., etc.) and bear in mind you might take some heat if they check it out on a day one friend or another has changed his/her profile pic to something disturbing. You know, like a road-killed dog, or herself in a bikini with her hands pushing her, um, cleavage out the top, or what-have-you. It's just a risk. I'd rate the older male friend the parents don't know as WAY more disturbing to them.

So all-in-all, very nice job on the page. Nothing disturbing as is, pics are all good, seems in the range for a girl who's got it together. Just give the safety idea some thought. It's low risk, sure, but the penalty if you're The One is very high. Same thing if He finds one of your friends through you. Some thought, that's all. Great otherwise. If you were my daughter, I'd say the same things I've said, though I imagine in an even wordier discussion. Then I'd let it sink in a few weeks and bring it up again to see what you gained from it. Something, hopefully. Because it's not about you being their little girl until they have to let you go, it's about you being brought along to adulthood, safely and surely, by the time you reach adulthood so you can experience its rewards and minimize the harm you cause others while learning. Lessons you learn at 15 cause you, and others, far less pain (and money and jail time!) than lessons learned at 25 or 35.

Answer 2

There is a good guide for parents about online networking sites - you could check your profile with it and / or show your parents the site so they might be less afraid of you being on sites like myspace.

Check it out ( http://yuniti.com/parents_guide.php )

roynburt... - I think you're being a little paranoid. No one goes through that much trouble to find girls online.

There are so many who are WILLING and SEARCHING for older men (don't ask me why), that pedophiles barely even need to try.

Not to mention, so many girls are not careful at all with their information, and willingly share more than they should (age, sexual preferences, phone number, full name, etc) - people who take any precaution at all are pretty much safe.

Answer 3

It's not nearly as bad as most pages I see!!2 suggestions, your high school name and town and picture are all on there, right? Someone who wanted to find you, could... at school. I would take that info off. Also I would change your profile to private, you don't need a bunch of random people you don't know looking at your page and learning about you. It's a scary thing how crazy some people are these days!

Answer 4

I don't know your parents, it looks like a normal teenager's page. But I don't understand normal teenagers even though I'm only 25. I wouldn't want my kids talking like your friends do on the comments section, a lot of swaring and inappropraite comments. And it seems like a lot of your info isn't correct, unless you really do have a kid and are 99 years old? I just don't get why kids today are so vulgar and want to grow up so fast, I wasn't like that.

Answer 5

Well your one friend said a couple swear words on your comments, but I don't know if your parents would care. Also they might not like that you put what school you go to. I think you should put your profile on Private, its way safer and sicko s can't see all your pics and info. Good luck :)

Answer 6

Except that you lied about your age (some parents are psycho about that) and you need to learn how to use the timer on your camera its much better than most teen's myspaces.

Answer 7

I think it looks fine, its a lot better then most profiles I see out there

Answer 8

Body type, hometown, ethnicity thing shouldn't be on there. You should know not to put up things that describe you, someone could try and find you (like a pedophile). If I was your mom and saw that, I'd be mad.

Answer 9

didn't read the page,but I think you should stop worrying about what everyone else thinks or how other people are going to react,and remember you're 15yrs old.You're allowed to live your life,your own way,without having to 'tailor' it to suit other people.If you try keeping other people happy at the expense of living your life,then it won't work! Be happy xx

Answer 10

I saw the word, b i t c h, t w a t, and s h i t, within the first three seconds.

Answer 11

the sexual thing id tap that is bad as are most of your comments and your page should be private so that not anyone can view it very dangerous