Do you give back an engagement ring if HE called the engagement off?

Question

I didn't cheat or anything. We were just in a petty fight and he was done. I gave it back but my mom was telling me that I should have kept it. This was 2 months ago.

Answer 1

It depends what the sanctity & spirit of that ring to you.

If you look it as a momento of your love and relation, then you did absolute right. Coz if both of you didnot want that relation, what is the fun keeping that with you. By retuning that ring, you have gained an upper hand and gave him an emotional hit.

If you think of material gains, then you might have kept it.

Answer 2

Since the ring was to signify the engagement and the future wedding and marriage etc. I think you did the right thing
why keep something that would just remind you of him and well make you feel bad. I would also think he was right to call it off if he couldn't survive a petty fight he would not be able to handle marriage. Find a new guy that has some backbone.

Best Wishes and may God Bless You.

Answer 3

1st: If it was 2 months ago, why are you still going on about it? If he hasn't contacted you, to make amends, make peace, reconcile by now, he's probably not going to. Hypothetically, if he did, your sense of self-worth needs to dictate, based on the legitimacy of his reasoning, whether that would be healthy or productive for you.

2nd: Obviously, he wanted OUT. If someone breaks up with you, over something "petty," either: a)they were just looking for an excuse, because they found they really didin't like you, like they thought they did, or realized they had made a mistake in selecting you for a role that significant in their lives; b) the argument was, for them, 'the last straw,' in other things between you that had been irking them; or, c)what you called "petty" was meaningful to them, & your values didn't match. We have to learn to be gentle with each other, it's easy, if something doesn't matter to us, to be coldly, even cruelly insensitive to people we care dearly about.

3rd: The question you ask has become a legal one, time & time again. Infidelity on his part would make the ring yours, I believe, as long as you didn't somehow "cause" it, by your own, or some other reasons. Arguments are a dfferent matter &, it would depend on the Court (Judge &/or jury), and the day.

Engagement is usually serious. In the interest of making peace, you might want to contact him -write, calls & visits can seem confrontational, in a situation like that. Be brief, don't be accusatory, but I believe you're within your right to ask, "What happened?"
And, be open, don't be defensive about watever the response -other people have views, feelings & reactions as valid as our own, even if we don't share them.
Depending on what your exchanges have been in the past, he may not respond. You may be (even inadvertently), or come across, as someone who uses sensitive information as a weapon, or who goads people into arguments & he may no longer trust you.
Whatever the case, there is peace in knowing that you tried, and if you are sincere, and hold no ulterior motive, you should be able to heal & move on from there.

If you ever make any stuation in, or involving love a matter of win or lose, you will always lose, whatever the result. Remember that.

Good luck.

Answer 4

In all honesty, it depends on where you live, but most states would have awarded him the ring if he took you to court over it. It is a conditional gift. If the condition isn't fulfilled for any reason, it is returned to the purchaser.
I think you did the right thing. Why would you even want a cursed ring? It is a symbol of a failed relationship now. Who would want to hang on to that forever? Even if you sell it and buy something else, you will always know the money came from that stupid ring. I think it was not only mature on your part, but the best thing you could do for your own healing.

Answer 5

Forget what everyone before told you. The engagement ring is to be returned to the man no matter what the reason that the engagement ended. That is not just etiquette, it is the law in almost every state. You could be sued if you don't return it, and if you pawn it or sell it you will have to pay the full value of the ring.

Answer 6

Assuming he is the one that proposed and has given the ring to u for marriage then you should GIVE IT BACK becuase your engagement is off. Analogy:
A couple goes out for awhile. During that time, each of them had possessions of items and belongings to one another. They both then don't go out anymore, resulting in "returning" belongs

Just like say I am going to marry you and give you a ring but decided not to marry you. It is my ring, it is rightfully mine to have and own.

Even if one cheats, is the innocent going to get back by selling the ring and getting the money??? No way, he/she would not want to have anything to do with the ring thats contradicting and would not want the money value of it to keep.

Don't be fooled by the other comments, such nonsense! Wheres your dignity for crying out loud? Keep it if you want to be known as a cheapscape. Show some respect towards marriage itself. Keeping that ring that represent marriage when YOUR not married shows that your not a good moral person


You'll have to discuss this tho. Although its his, if he asks for it back then you have to comply and give it. If he hasn't responded nor want it back its yours. Remember, he has the right to have it back. You have the right to keep it if said otherwise

Answer 7

cj- --It actually depends on what state you are living in. An engagement ring is considered a contractual gift and in some states regardless of who broke the contract the ring is the property of the purchaser. In that case he could sue you for its value. I think you were wise to return it regardless. A clean slate is the way to go and it would probably generate more negative feelings for you to keep it. I feel badly that he hurt you, but proud that you did the right thing and were the bigger person in this.

Answer 8

Both my husband and I were engaged before. I broke off my engagement and returned the ring to my ex. He broke of their engagement and she offered the ring back so he took it. He gave it to his mother and she had a necklace made out of it. And the reason I gave mine back is because why keep a reminder of a failed relationship?

Answer 9

If it was you to call it off then yes you should of gave back the ring. He was the one who called it off so you should of been able to keep it. Would you really want to keep something like that though? After the ring leaves the store the ring value is nothing. Everytime you look at that ring it will remind you of him.

Answer 10

Engagement is a promise to marry.If he calls the wedding off he broke the promise so you could of kept the ring.However to keep peace in the mid-east you should surrender the ring.