I just had a baby and im not married..I mean im not a bad person and me and my boyfriend are really happy together and totally in love..its just that right now we arent able to afford his crappy health insurance. We would have to have it if we got married for the baby and everything..and its really expensive and he even has a really good job.
No one understands i guess.
2007-10-30 05:13:07 · 36 answers · asked by BooBell=) 6 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Polls & Surveys
I understand, you're using a public assistance program for the baby...many people would say you should've waited to have a baby until you and your boyfriend could afford to raise a child without government assistance. That places the burden of your decision on the rest of us. I am in a long term relationship with my fiance and we have not elected to have a baby because we too are not financially prepared. Just a thought, don't get pregnant again until you are more financially stable. Bless you and your family, I do not judge you. I'm only giving an educated response to the question.
2007-10-30 05:22:30 · answer #1 · answered by Mizz SJG 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well...what kind if insurance are you using? Maybe people are judgemental about that (heavy on the "mental" part)? Who knows.
You know, before there were priests, there were people getting married. People stay together or they don't, and marriage has nothing to do with it, really. In fact, every divorced person I know was married once, so where's the "magic" in being married?!
If you are happy, then enjoy it. It's a fact of the working poor now...insurance is a big issue, and people make decisions like yours all the time because of this type of situation. People used to do the same thing to avoid the "marriage tax" years ago...in fact, I knew a couple that actually got divorced so that they could lower their taxes. They stayed together, though.
Good luck to you and your new family!
2007-10-30 05:19:53 · answer #2 · answered by Night Owl 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you do not understand also. Understand that a marriage is not a piece of paper it is a union of two loving parents to bring a child up in under the umbrella of love.
Marriage regardless of how some people pollute the idea is a commited way to show the your child who are the parents the bonded love you have for each other. If you are really in love with each other as you make out then declaring that love shouldn't be no problem with marriage.
The paper is a legal formality neccessary but the loving arrangement is the real thing.
2007-10-30 05:17:28 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Hey, I sure don't judge people for this. Been there done that- You can say I broke the mold in my Family. All that matters is that baby! There is always a place in the world for a baby. I commend you for what you've done. YOU ARE NOT A BAD PERSON- NEITHER AM I! I work, and work hard. I don't care what people think of me. My Family and Friends love me unconditionally. When I had to tell my Grandpa about my situation, I was SCARED! He sent me a letter the next day. He told me how proud he was of me for not aborting my child. He told me he has always been proud of me, and for taking care of people in the Health Field. He said things that made me cry with tears of joy! I have this letter, along with the picture of my Grandfather holding my son PROUDLY! This was my experience. My Grandpa is now no longer with us. I miss him dearly! To those of you DOGGIN this wonderful gal here is a message to you all:
"JUDGE NOT"
I dreamed death came the other night-
And Heaven's Gates swung wide-
And kindly there, an Angel stood-
To usher me inside-
And there, TO MY ASTONISHMENT-stood folks I'd known on earth-
Some I'd deemed as having little value, and very little worth!
INDIGNANT words came to my lips-
But, never were set free-
For those who stood before my eyes-
HAD NOT EXPECTED ME!!
Moral of the story: Who are you to judge somebody? My Grandmother wrote this poem, and it was read @ her Funeral. Do those of you judging this gal live a "perfect" life? GO AHEAD- THUMBS DOWN ME! Do you really think I care? Lol- I don't!
Leave this gal alone, she is a good person, and asked about judgement re: herself and her situation. I am sure her self esteem is already low due to some of ur venomous answers!
You just keep loving that baby, loving your man, sweetie! It will all work out. What matters is that child is in a loving home. This is not always the case with MARRIED couples. This is unfortunate, as their child becomes the victim. PLEASE, do NOT allow yourself to be a victim to such a wonderful event! Congratulations and take care! E-mail me anytime. I am not always going to answer immediately, but, you will hear from me. THIS I will promise! Take care, hold your head high, and be PROUD of your bundle of JOY! Thank GOD this child came into a LOVING HOME!
2007-10-30 05:42:21 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I understand and i will support u... I have answered alot of your questions and u seem to be a nice kind and sweet person and as long as you are happy and your boyfriend is happy and u raise your children to be happy than it doesnt matter what the other people think... Just raise your family with love and respect and u all will be ok...
2007-10-30 06:03:50 · answer #5 · answered by THE UK WILDCAT FAMILY 10 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Listen, if it wasn't this, people would judge you for something else. That's just life unfortunately. No matter what you do in life, and how much you try to be a good person, there will be that group of people who tends to only see the negative part. Ignore them, you just live your life the way that is right for you!
Good luck!
2007-10-30 05:17:16 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Congrat!!! on ur baby and many blessings to you all. Get married when the time is right for the both of you. It's noone' business except ya's.....Don't let it bother you of what everyones else says. Do whatis in your Heart(s)....God Bless..by the way..i am a single mom raising 2 kids since their birth.(alone).not married...Big Deal...I won't go to hell for it..I can assure you that..
2007-10-30 05:20:46 · answer #7 · answered by justmenothinelse 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
F_ck them ppl who look down on you. They don't mean sh!t and the end of the day. . .or the beginning of the day if you really want to go there. Why you are not married is no one's business but you & your man's, tell everyone else to blow it out of thier azz. Most of the ppl who are judging you are not happy in thier relationships and want company to go w/ thier misery. Don't fall into that pit chick!
2007-10-30 05:40:25 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ignore the idiots luv, They arent important. Some people think their opinion needs to be known. Don't let it bother you, theres nothing wrong with having a child outside of marriage. It is a choice you and your boyfriend made for a reason :]
2007-10-30 05:18:56 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
I won't judge, my situation almost sounds the same. We have been together 8 years, not technically married but by common law and we have 2 children. I understand it's hard with children!!
2007-10-30 05:18:32 · answer #10 · answered by ♥ HeNnEsSy ™ 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋