what do you do when some one that hardly knows you challenges your integrity?

Question

thanx guys for giving me some thoughts to consider respect your opinions

Answer 1

There are a lot of good answers here, and a few dodgy (but funny) ones too.

However, there is not one mention of the impact it has on a person with high integrity, to have that integrity questioned. It's a shock, and it isn't that easy to deal with from the point of view of the person who's integrity is being questioned.

I strongly suspect that this person feels inferior to you, and he/she is engaging in a bit of levelling. He/she can't raise themselves to your standard, so they are are trying to lower your status in order to feel better about themselves. Your giving their accusations credence or acknowledgement only helps them in this process. If this person is spreading this around,and it is affecting your livelihood, then if you can afford it, consult a lawyer and warn him/her off with a letter threatening a law suit (doesn't cost much for a letter).

All I can say is that you know the truth. You don't have any control over what this person thinks or says, but you do have control over how you react to it.If the damage is only mental and not material, I'd urge you to maintain that control and try (no matter how hard) to let go of it.

Answer 2

Does that person's opinion matter to you? I mean, I could challenge your integrity, but would you care? How could someone who doesn't really know you challenge your integrity in a meaningful way? Unless it were a situation that you KNEW was clearly wrong (finding a wallet with an id that had money and keeping the money before turning the wallet in), I would find it difficult to imagine a situation where someone who didn't know me could challenge my integrity in such a way that I would be concerned.

So, what I'd do is tell the person that he's entitled to his own opinion and change the conversation or walk away.

Answer 3

That depends. In case your integrity is indeed doubtful but that you have been able cleverly to conseal it from those who know you and whom you know such confrontation by an unknown person would be a rude shock. Anger would no doubt be there but also fear which in turn would fan the anger. If you are really clean thenyour being shocked is natural.

So your reaction would depend onthe circumstances of the case. If it is the case of an exposure then control yourself. Otherwise you are likely to overreact and spoil your case.Your reaction should be a lofty disdain. Again if the charge is entirely unfounded even thendo not blow up because blowing up creates suspicion in the minds of even your friends who know you. Meet the charge with a polite 'Oh, is that so. I did not know about this myself so far. You must indeed be above all. ."The cool r eation would be more effective .Invite him and promise him that you would remove all his doubts,if any inthe matter if he shares his doubts with you.

Answer 4

I can only speak for myself,but I usually do have a listen,then I look at my own behavior,just to check that they do or don't have a point.
If they do,well ok,maybe it's something to work on,my choice to make.
If they don't,then I just consider the source and let it go.
I have enough to do than take someone else's inventory.
Too busy with my own stuff, I value integrity a lot.
The old adage of pointing a finger,while three point back at 'cha,so not a good plan I'd agree.

Answer 5

If it's important to you that this person not question your integrity; then ask that person to explain why he/she thinks your integrity should be questioned. Many times misunderstandings result because two people view a situation from different perspectives or are emphasizing different aspects of a situation.

FE

Answer 6

I do the same as malice. Just ignore them. They clearly have no idea of who I am or what I may stand for. Jumping to conclusions about someone is an action or defense mechanism of a dishonorable person.

Answer 7

They have demonstarted their own lack of integrity by not having sufficient knowledge on which to base a valid opinion. Point this out clearly and politely.

Then drop them with a monster right hook and stamp on their head.

Answer 8

I usually simply smile and thank them for their opinion. It is my opinion that counts and by confronting or becoming angry at them, my peaceful integrity would not show itself.. Show don't tell.

Answer 9

I am ready to take on the challenge. If I am in the wrong, I will admit it. If I am right, you will find it to be true.

Answer 10

Tell them exactly that , if it ever happened, You hardly know me so why are you judging me , If you live in a glass house , dont be throwing rocks at me*