My boyfriend and I have been together for a year and 5 months now. I have never given him any reason not to trust me and I've been loyal to him throughout the relationship (eventhough he hasn't, and he's been unloyal more than 6 times). But whenever we go out, he gets furious, even so, that he'd punch any guy that even looks in my direction. I've confronted him about this, and he always tells me that he trusts me, it's just the other guys he don't trust. So guess what it all comes down to? He never takes me out anymore and just goes alone. Why is this?!
2007-10-29 23:13:16 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
This one goes to Emma.
I've never even looked at another guy while we've been together, let alone hug or kiss them. I've even deleted all of my "guy-Friends'" numbers from my phone. I don't have mxit, I'm not on facebook, I hardly speak to another guy than my bf. He is the only guy in my world. If you took him out, I'd probably look lesbian.
2007-10-29 23:39:51 · update #1
You said that he's been disloyal many times so he probably equates his behaviour to yours. Maybe he thinks you'll do the same thing as he's done before.
Karma works in weird ways and now he's insecure even though you're not being disloyal.
EDIT: you've done so much for him (not having guy friends etc) and if he can't appreciate that, then you're probably just wasting your time. It seems as though he's basically got control over you. If he gets furious easily, who's to say that he may take it on you. I think you should just let him go. You seem like a really good gf and very committed since you're willing to sacrifice for him, i'm sure there's another guy who will be equally committed to you and treat you right.
2007-10-29 23:17:59 · answer #1 · answered by 1080 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Put your feet in his shoes. if he had alot of Chic's staring at him how would you feel. You never know any situation until you live in it. Do you know what he gets up to. It is not fair on you to stay home and he go out. You have to voice out an opinion and be herd by him. If he does trust you he should not feel so insecure. He should see the fact that cause he has cheated on you several times you are still right by his side now that has to count for something. In the end you do have to look at your relationship and do the pros and cons test. Is this what you really want for the rest of your life? I don't what to sound mean but once a cheater always a cheater and I've been where you are now and i chose to leave now i am happy with someone who thinks the world of me. It does happen
2007-10-30 06:33:38 · answer #2 · answered by Confused 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, a lot of girls overplay their guy's jealously... Guys, back me up on this, I know I'm right. Some times it comes down to a different definition of what's appropriate. i was talking to a friend once and she was complaining about her jealous boyfriend, and I asked "Have you ever cheated on him?" She said no. I probed "Absolutely nothing at all?" "Well, I mean I've kissed a few guys I met here and there, but nothing serious...". To me, that's cheating. I'd be upset if my boyfriend were kissing other women. But to some people it's not. Better example: I sometimes say that other guys are cute. My boyfriend doesn't like that. I used to do jokingly whisper to him when I saw a hottie, but i could see it really bothered him, so I stopped. I guess it would bother me if he pointed out every good-looking girl.
Anyway, I'm rambling, but you get the point. Maybe he just has different standards, and what you think of as innocent flirting looks like cheating.
Either that or maybe he just REALLY loves you and this is how he shows it. In that case, put your arms around his neck and say, "Honey, I love you so much, I couldn't cheat on you if I tried. You can trust me." And give him a big smooch. Problem solved.
2007-10-30 06:27:18 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let me tell you a little about men or boys! Why are you still with this person that has cheated/messed around on you 6 times? Do you not want someone who treats you Great! or is everything that you deserve? In my opinion, if a man was going to cheat on me then that would be the end of it. I am too good to be put down and hurt like that. There is toooooo many men in the see for you girl!!! If he keeps getting jealous like you say then, he is only get jealous about other guys and angry as a distraction. See, men tend try and make things seem like its the womans fault when their cheating so they will do anything to distract the girlfriend. As for the not taking you out anymore, think about this!!......He is taking other women out on dates or has another female friend he hangs out with. He isnt taking you out anymore because he doesn't want to be seen in public with you...possibly he has another girlfriend or he is bored or he's an asshole. Truth hurts honey...but wake up and smell the fresh air around you. Life is way too short to go around and have to worry about things like these.....Good Luck! SR
2007-10-30 06:27:19 · answer #4 · answered by Stacey1236 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well... here's my take on it... you did say that he's been unloyal to you right? i think that guys become this green eyed monster whenever they've done something to their girls. He's probably thinking that since he's been fooling around, then you're capable of doing the same thing. I'm really sorry to say but he probably doesnt trust you. However, this mistrust is only brought about his PARANOIA that you might be cheating on him. Saying that he doesnt trust the other guys is just an excuse to he wont have to deal with telling you straight up that he doesnt trust you that much.
2007-10-30 06:20:23 · answer #5 · answered by Allen 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just forget it the guy..jealous happen when someone so in luv wif tat person.but sometime it will bring to bad influents.and now he is controlling u by not letting u go out either wif him.terrible..he must trust u ya.tat is called luv......not by keeping u in the house.he should proud 2 have u....coz there is so many people r looking on u.n u r loyal in ur relationship too..think carefully n take action before he do anything bad 2 u gal'
2007-10-30 06:26:38 · answer #6 · answered by leyha lshahira 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have always believed that guys who act this way are guilt-ridden, he knows that he does this action himself and he doesn't trust himself either...He has become insecured and all because all what he sees outside with you is the result of his own actions to others...let him know that you are really for no one, assure him by being consistent to him, tell him you need him , and make himrealize how beautiful your relationship is...he is just afraid to lose you, and he doesn't know how to take care of you and the situation that is why he gets such negative reactions..help him out.,.the key to this problem is in your hands...let him be comfortable in your relationship..and he gets better!!!good luck!
2007-10-30 06:25:02 · answer #7 · answered by E@rthGoddess 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As I view things out, he seems to be the "unfaithful and not worthy boyfriend" for you. I do understand that you love him (if not, you will not last up to 1 yr and 5 months)...but, you should also consider his attitude, for me, he doesn't love you as much as you love him. Come to think of it, how come he cheated you for so many times? and then what thinking that you are the one who might cheat? Oh gross! I hate guys like him!!!
~~as the saying goes "the thinkers are the doers~~
2007-10-30 06:29:21 · answer #8 · answered by janediana_garcia 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Insecurity.
2007-10-30 06:18:04 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe he realises that what he did was wrong an dhe thinks you'll leave him and he's trying to make sure you don't, talk to him but if things dont get better then leave him because if he's not loyal and your not happy with him then what would be the point in staying with him, hope this helps
2007-10-30 06:18:54 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋