OK parents, what is the worse thing you child has ever done? I mean the WORSE thing?

Question

my daughter who will be 17 in 45minutes (30th) just informed me that she had committed a "Federal Felony" offence!! Over a 4 day period she deposited "empty" desposit env. and with drew cash, the total is over $1600!!!!
I have NEVER been as angry with my children as I am now. As you know (and this was confirmed by the bank) that because she's a minor, I'M RESPONSIBLE FOR THE CRIME AS WELL AS THE MONEY!!
I found out the boyfriend (who's 18) also did the same thing and even encouraged her. Needless to say he's GONE!!

part of me wanted to vent, the other part wanted to ask this question to see if I'm the only parent with a felon child...

correction: "WORST"

FYI: the bank had given this account to her alone, my name is nowhere on it. In this state you can be a minor and open an account without a parent.
I have no intentions on paying this debt, but according to the bank, they have advised me to contac an attorney for myself.

Answer 1

wow what a way to spend her birthday...

while I have no children of my own I do see a lot of children that are in trouble with the law as a justice, I go to the police station when the parents well not go down for the interviews.

I have seen children go in to a interview on Wednesday and get bail and then go right out and do the same thing that they just got bail for!! and have a police record a mile long (this is a 14 year old) when he was picked up by the police he was stoned on paint fumes so we had to Wat for him to come down from the high.

then there was a another one where the child in the station was 16 years old and he was charged with raping his 4 year old cosine while over at her home (now doing 8 years for it too) so i think what your child did was BAD but your not the worst off as at lest from what you have said it is the fist time to have a charge read out on her at lest, but boy o boy what a great start to her criminal life.

good luck with it and i would be making her do a lot of extra work around the house until she has paid you back and learned the lesson

Answer 2

As common as teen mothers are, they are rare individuals in our communities and do attract undue attention as people imagine what that must be like or if it was their daughter in that situation. I am an older parent and I am so glad that I am. I got to really enjoy every second of my 20s and live for myself. I got to travel and date and live alone. Live alone - that's the important one. I don't think I could have coped as a young mother - I don't think I would have had the patience and I think I would have resented not getting a chance to live for myself after 19 years of living under someone else's roof. Having said that, my mother was almost 16 when she had me and my twin sister. That's right folks - 2 babies attending her sweet 16 and a third before she was 20 and then divorced at 22 and raised us largely alone. It boggles my mind, frankly and I was there. My mom and I are devoted friends and have been all our lives. The small age difference between us has been a total blessing and now she is young enough to enjoy her grandchildren, even though I waited until I was 33 to become a mother - more than double the age she did. My mother has told me that the relationship that we have shared has made all the crap she had to put up with in her life worthwhile. We live just a few doors away from each other and I am very grateful that she did have me so early in her life. By now I am her oldest and dearest friend - it's a perspective that few mother/daughter relationships get to share. Don't pay any attention to what others say and do. Go girl, go! Peace!

Answer 3

First, to the pastor, with due respect: Having this girl get a job at Mickey D's would be a good idea, but they don't hire convicted felons and people suspected of embezzlement or related crimes. This girl needs to be in counseling and some therapy, and she also needs to serve some time behind bars for her crimes. To the asker: I can't relate a story about my kids' worst crime, because I don't have children, but I can tell you that you need to report what your daughter's boyfriend did to the police. He needs to be caught and prosecuted too- he can go to jail for enticing a minor into such acts, which is a felony by itself in most states. I would go ahead and repay the bank, and then I would make it impossible for your daughter to access your accounts again. This means you need to take away any debit, credit, or prepaid spending cards which might be linked to your accounts. Change your passwords and pin numbers as well, and you may also want to get a new account number which only you know. Next, you need to get your daughter into to treatment- she obviously needs some help and counseling so she can figure out why it was so important to her to steal from you in the first place. Lastly, your daughter needs to be made to repay what she stole, as well as all the fines, fees from the bank, and court costs- out of whatever allowance money she has. If she has no allowance, then she needs to get a job, and have her activities monitored constantly. If she isn't in school or working, she needs to be AT HOME. I would prohibit her from driving anywhere for a while as well, because anyone who is foolish and stupid enough to do this and think that they could get away with it is obviously not going to be trustworthy behind the wheel of a car. Driving is a privilege, NOT a RIGHT, and your daughter needs to be reminded of this. As for her going to jail- that might only be for a weekend or something similar, given that she is a minor. It depends on what the laws in your state say about such offenses.

I am sorry you are facing such a crisis on what should be a pleasant day. Your daughter needs help, and she clearly has some very hard lessons to learn. As for her boyfriend, the police will catch up with him eventually, and when they do, he will probably end up in jail for a while. He needs to go there and think about what he did, to her and to you. Good luck, I hope it works out.

Answer 4

No you are not alone, there are many of us mothers out there with felony kids.

My daughter when she was younger was in charge of the younger siblings while I was gone down state for an afternoon, (Mind you she was 17 at the time). Needless to say while I was gone with my fiance, she let the drug dealers of the neighborhood into my home to take what ever they wanted to pay her debts. I lost everything, right down to my tablelamps and vacuum cleaner. It was like I was starting all over again from scratch. In the mean time my 14 year old son was passed out drunk on the couch, I was so furious, my daugher was getting paid to babysit, and this is what i got. Not only did I lose everything I owned, but she let her little brother get high and drunk with the neighborhood heathens.

Good luck with your dilema.

Answer 5

My 17 year old has been caught drinking and another time shop lifting as an accessory although not arrested.

Do you want to shake her and ask her "what were you thinking? Or were you thinking?"
(I have a daughter that will be 11 on the 30th! Different daughter obviously, but we were preggers at the same time of year!)
Tally a list of the expenses you are incurring for this criminal behaviour. She needs to sign an IOU to pay you back for your expenses. No, there is no price to be put on the emotional upheaval and fear you are going through, but at her age money is a great motivator. She can be ungrounded when the expenses are paid off. It took 5 weeks for my daughter to pay off my missing work to come and get her from the store she was caught at. So far, it has worked for us!
You are not alone. And she has some hard lessons to learn and I pray she learns them soon.

Answer 6

well I'm not a parent but I live in a small town and as you have probably heard.... nothing is ever kept secret in small towns. Well maybe 3 weeks ago three teenage boys, 1 was 16 1 was 15 and 1 was around 13, They stole their parents car and debit card and took off to Mexico. The car was found and impounded across the border and the kids called the mom and asked her to come get them.... IN MEXICO and when she went and got them she found out they spent over $4000 out of her bank account. So no you ARENT the only one.

Answer 7

Seriously I wouldn't know what to do if I were in your shoes.

My son is only 5 years old and the worst thing he's ever done is pour water on all of our electronics to watch them fry.
We've gone through 2 Comcast boxes due to that and that was when he was only 2!

Before that he was fascinated with licking the electrical outlets so we covered them and he picked off the coverings to get at them which gave him a new idea.

And that idea lead to him unscrewing everything in our house using only his fingers.
I sat on a chair to eat breakfast and the chair collapsed then after that the table fell apart right in front of me then I noticed all of the metal things that separate the carpet from the linoleum were off and screws were all over the floor!

Then he flushed an entire box of tampons down the toilet and plugged up the sink with toilet paper turned on the faucet and closed the bathroom door.
I stood wondering why the carpet outside the bathroom door was all wet then it occurred to me it was coming from the bathroom!

One morning I awoke to find that all the contents of my refrigerator were all over the kitchen walls and floor and my son was using the ketchup and mayonnaise to fingerprint on the walls but that's not as bad as the time he woke me up at 6am throwing eggs at my head and laughing because he thought it was funny.
Or the time he got my dish soap and poured it all over the stairs leading up to the front door so as I was walking down the steps with a load of laundry I went sliding all the way down the stairs!

This is the kind of behavior I had to deal with on a daily basis when he was younger.

One summer I worked really hard growing tomatoes and right before they were ripe my son thought he would help me by picking all of them and throwing them over the fence into the neighbors yard.
He's only five years old and just started Kindergarten and seems to be behaving himself for the meantime.
But God I hope he never comes home one day and tells me he committed a felony.
I don't know what I'd do if he did.
Pray for your daughter and keep a close watch on the company she keeps but whatever you do don't hurt her or send her away that will only make it worse.
Make her work to pay for it then love her because after all our children need to know we love them even after they've done something wrong or haven't done anything to deserve it.
God bless you and I hope everything works out for you and your daughter.

Answer 8

My Daughter hitch hiked thru 3 states at 14,she will be 16 soon,she went with a guy & another girl and was gone for 3 weeks without a word from her...It about killed me..I was so glad she was safe but wanted to kill her soon after!>=)Since then we have been very close and nothing as tramatic has happened since..I believe that adventure made her appreciate all she has at home with us..

Answer 9

This is pretty bad. I'm 29 years old and my daughter is not quite 3 so I don't have any stories to compare to that. My sis-in-law ran away to Mexico with a guy when she was a minor. That was scary. Good luck, I know I will need it when my kids become teenagers.

Answer 10

I'm not a parent but I am a teen myself.
When I was 15 I ran away from home. From Texas to Arizona.
With my boyfriend.
I lied to my parents and told them I was in Mexico so that they wouldn't press charges or nothing..
[in mexico they dont really do nothing]
Well I really hurt my parents..{i regreted it}
Well Now I am 17 and married.[legally]
I know I did it the wrong way.. but at the end my parents let me get married. I know I hurt them alot..
but it has all changed.. Thank God.
I am now expecting baby #1.
About to turn 18..
But I know that was the worst thing I have done.
but it all turned out good.