I have a serious problem that's been bothering me for a while. I've been with my boyfriend for over 2 years and my brother doesn't really like him. He always made little comments about my boyfriend and last night when I went out with my boyfriend he told my mom why does she let me go out with a drug addict like him. I know that my boyfriend doesn't use drugs or smokes pot, he occasionally has a beer and smokes cigarettes but that's it. I think that my brother's ex girlfriend told him lies about my boyfriend because she didn't like me. I just don't understand why is my brother being like this? My boyfriend said he will talk to him about it but I dont want that too happen because it will cause more problems between my mom and my brother. What do I do? My boyfriend is the nicest person I ever knew and never hurt me my brother should be happy for me but he's not. It's like he wants me to break up with the only guy I ever cared for. What do I do?
2007-10-29 14:19:16 · 21 answers · asked by DoLz 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Can someone help me because I'm tired of stressing over this and crying. Thanks!!!
2007-10-29 14:19:47 · update #1
To CC = I know for a fact that it was his ex girlfriend because we had alot of problems with her arguing with my mom and even making stuff about me. My brother started talking sh*t about my boyfriend after he started going out with her.
2007-10-29 14:25:26 · update #2
I am not defending my boyfriend but I know how he is and how my brother is too. My brother never liked any of my boyfriends. The last boyfriend I went out with he said he had a big head?? WTF, he's not 10, he is 23!!!
2007-10-29 14:37:39 · update #3
That is a little rough. It's hard to have your family not llike the person you are dating. Your family should always be there for you no matter what. Even if they don't like who you date they should respect you. I think the best thing you could do is to sit everyone down and just have an open talk and explain everything. Answer their questions and get everything out. Let your boyfriend talk and set things right. Let your family get to know him like you do.
2007-10-29 14:26:05 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am sure your brother would not accuse your boyfriend being a drug addict if he didn't have proof or basis. I would greatly suggest you confront your brother and ask for his side. His your brother so I'm pretty sure he cares for you very much and only want what's best for you. You don't spend 24/7 with your boyfriend - so benefit of the doubt that he only smokes cigarettes and drink beer. But if I were you, I would take time to hear the truth from my brother before I post any judgment on him. As for your boyfriend - you don't have to break up with him unless your brother is right.
2007-10-29 21:27:32 · answer #2 · answered by addicted too 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes maybe you and your mom and brother should all sit down one night or day and talk about your brothers prob with your boyfriend.. first you should let him tell you why he dose not like him. but make sure you dont start talking and fighting with him.. and then you give your side. which is why you like him so much make sure you teel the truth and tell him that if he is upset that you and his sis and bro relationship will change make sure you tell him that it wont and be sure to have your boy friend try to talk as buddies with your bro make him feel like he is wanted in a friend way to hang. and you and your boyfriend could also take you brother and a girlfriend or just a friend ( make sure it is a girl ) out to dinner or a movie.. see if that works
2007-11-01 15:04:15 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
At the very least, you need to call your brother down on his attempts to insert himself into your business. If he doesn't have anything more concrete than some junk his ex-GF told him, then he needs to stay completely out of it.
Remind him that two can play those kinds of games as well.
If you want to show your mother what kind of person your BF is, then see if you can bring yours and his parents together for a little introduction. That gives an appeal of respectability that your brother cannot disable through his slander. Try serving some tea and hors d’oeuvres.
2007-10-29 21:41:06 · answer #4 · answered by revsuzanne 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
While not always the case, there is usually a good reason siblings and other family members do not like/approve of a relationship. Because they are a third party in the relationship, they are able to be more objective and see the bigger picture, whereas you and your boyfriend only see things from your limited point of view.
I would talk to your brother and find out the reasons why he does not like/approve of your boyfriend. Be open and consider what he has to say. If the reason is not valid (ie, "I don't like him because he has brown hair") you can dismiss it. If the reason is valid (ie, "I don't like him because he treats you badly") you may want to consider listening to him.
Whatever you decide to do, remember that your choice affects not only you, but your boyfriend and your family.
2007-10-29 21:40:13 · answer #5 · answered by capturedheart143 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ok well your brother is probs trying to look out for you and doesnt want his sis to get hurt try having a convo with him and see what he says but if he cant get to like him or even get on for sake of you then he dnt care much does he?! keep wid ur bf if you love him no matter wot ppl say just make sure u no waht ppl r saying r not true if rumors go rnd! but like u said if he is a nice guy and the best u have ever hasd then dnt loose it. also u said ur bro has never liked any of ur bf then it just proves he dnt have a problem with this one just all the guys u have been out with. so just tlk to him adn if tht dnt work then u do wht u think deep dwn is right but dnt loose the best bf u have ever had !!! gd luck
2007-10-30 07:18:26 · answer #6 · answered by Cootie 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get infos on your boyfriend. Ex: you must meet with his parents at times? Ask questions, without being rude. Talk to his friends, no ex-glf of course... Ask your brother what he thinks and sees for him to say certain things? He's a guy too, he may sense something??? Try not to get upset about it, You defend you bf so hard,,, find out what you don't know, there maybe something to know??? Good luck!
2007-10-29 21:31:43 · answer #7 · answered by kayneriend 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to confront your brother and tell you are tearing up inside and that your relationship with him, as well has your boyfriend are really being strained by the comments he is making! It sounds like your brother needs to do a little growing to me :)
2007-10-29 21:43:45 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
okay, you need to figure out whether your brother is jealous that you are spending time without him or if he is really concerned about you. he is probably protective and may not have the courage to tell you what is going on. if your boyfriend didn't do drugs, then your bro is prob just jealous of the time u spend with your bf
2007-10-29 23:31:56 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ah love is so blind
someone knows something and they are trying to help you not waste a bunch of time figuring it out.
Stop thinking everyone is lying and wait and see.
You might just get surprised.
Your boyfriend might be a druggie.
Then again maybe not
How naive do you want to let yourself be
She knows something you don't
Good luck
2007-10-29 21:24:58 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋