I know it's a little early to think about this, but I asked my boyfriend if he would go to prom with me, and he said no. He's a couple years older than me so he's in university now. He told me he didn't even go his own prom; he thinks it's stupid and lame.
However, he won't allow me to go with anyone else either. I don't think it's fair for him to not allow me to go with a guy friend when he's the one declining my offer in the first place. So I'm just wondering if there's any way I could convince him to go, rather than throw a tantrum and force him or end up angering him because I went with another guy? It's not like he lives far from me or anything. He's just once again, embarrassed of being seen with me even after 4 years of dating simply because I look young (he even admitted to this).
2007-10-29 12:59:27 · 33 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Don't convince. If he were a nice boy, I'd say, if he wants to go, then go with him. If he doesn't, then go alone.
Actually, though, he sounds like a controlling jerk you should dump. If he is embarrassed of you, ditch him.
2007-11-06 11:19:20 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had this same problem with my boyfriend when I was in Highschool and he graduated a year before me, He felt like he was too old and he didn't want to be seen at our "kitty" prom so I told him if you don't go I will go with someone else, he didn't approve but just threatening it made him consider going, I just explained to him that this is an important point in my life that I will never get back and I am not going to let him ruin it. THrow a tantrum if you have too but get your way! Good luck, hope you have fun at your prom
2007-10-29 13:06:12 · answer #2 · answered by lilsexy06 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If I were you, I would be very upset with this guy. Embarrassed to be seen with you? That's crap, ok? You shouldn't take that. In fact, he should take you to prom to make it up to you. Grr, that's just not fair. Tell him to be a man and take you. It's not all about what he wants. It's been four years, but clearly you value him more than he values you. Sorry. :(
If he still refuses to go, go with someone else. It's YOUR prom, not his! Let him know too. Say you're going with someone else (as friends) if he won't take you. If he decides that he wants to end it, let him. Or better yet, end it yourself. If he has the maturity of a college guy, then he'll take you, or at least let you go with a friend.
2007-10-29 13:05:47 · answer #3 · answered by htamboer 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He's embarassed to be seen with you and you've been dating 4 years? That's really messed up. I think you should go with someone that you know you'll have a good time with and not him. It sounds like he'd just mope and not let you have fun even if you talked him into it. He can't stop you from going with a friend... That's just rude. Prom does mean a lot to some people (I skipped my own but my boyfriend had said he would go if I really wanted to, he was in college too).
If my boyfriend invites me to something that's important to him, I go whether I really want to or not. And if I can't, I tell him to take a friend. I trust him.
Your boyfriend needs to grow up and not treat you like a kid even if you look younger than you are. Find a friend to go with would be my vote .Good luck.
2007-10-29 13:05:00 · answer #4 · answered by Kaylyn 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well, I don't think he really has a right to tell you that you can't go to your own prom. It's your prom, and even if he thinks that going to the prom is stupid, he should if it means a lot to you. Prom is a high school memory, and you have every right to experience it.
If he's embarassed to be seen with you, then I don't think he's worth it. If he loves you, he will care less about how other people perceive him when he is around you. Tell him that.
2007-10-29 13:04:31 · answer #5 · answered by Nitro 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I suggest that you simply tell him since he turned you down, you will find someone else to go with, you shouldn't have to miss your own prom simply because HE thinks they are lame. He is entitled to his opinion of course, but his opinion is not exactly law for you. If he really loves and cares about you, then he should not have a problem with this. If he does, maybe you need to reconsider your relationship, sounds like he is really trying hard to manipulate and control you to his satisfaction and this is not a healthy relationship.
2007-10-29 13:04:36 · answer #6 · answered by essentiallysolo 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If you think that missing your prom would be something you will regret later in life, then you need to go, with or without him. He may not realize how important this is to you. And if he doesn't want to be seen with you because of how you look, maybe that's not the only problem.
2007-10-29 13:11:17 · answer #7 · answered by Jenny D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's not a very nice boyfriend you got there. If he was a good boyfriend he would have agreed no matter what. Who would date a guy that was embarrased of them? If he doesn't want to go with you, who cares? Go with another guy! You're right; He IS the one who declined your offer in the first place.
2007-10-29 13:04:35 · answer #8 · answered by melissa 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
let the issue rest for a while, but maybe bring it back up again in the spring time like around march.
if you are calm and tell him how much it realy means to you, he might be more willing to go. i really dont think throwing a temper tantrum is going to help at all because it will just make you seem even more young.
tell him how much you love him and want to spend your special night with him, but if hes not willing to go you will find another date for the night because it's your prom night and you don't want to miss out on it.
if he agrees to go, thank him and make sure you don't act like too much of a diva with matching outfits, etc.
good luck!
2007-10-29 13:06:00 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
he's being selfish. even if he thinks it's stupid & lame he should at least compromise and go with you. you only get 1 prom (ok maybe 2 if you count your jr. and sr.!)
you shouldn't have to twist your BFs arm to get him to take you to prom. if you do, that's a problem. go with a guy friend and have fun. if he doesn't want to go, fine (well it's not fine really..) but he shouldn't be selfish and try to stop you from going. if he gets angry that you went w/ another guy then tell him to eat sh*t b/c he could have taken you.
if he's embarrassed of being seen w/ you then dump him ASAP! you deserve a guy who is proud to be seen with you. is he embarrassed when you get sexual with him?? that's messed up!
2007-10-29 13:04:26 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Another example of a person making a judgment without even knowing what they are judging.
How does he know it's lame.. because he saw it on "Leave it to Beaver"?
You should ask yourself this question... If he doesn't want to be around you now.. when he graduates before you and gets a job will he want to date you then?
It sounds to me like the relationship is on very thin ice.
2007-10-29 13:06:12 · answer #11 · answered by youngboy1606 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋