I was supposed to be in my friend's wedding, but just found out I'm pregnant. I would be about 8 months pregnant. She really wants me to be in it...and says she doesn't care that I'll be a big cow (my words) but I just think I'd ruin the entire look.
Advice please....
2007-10-29 08:42:25 · 40 answers · asked by Mrs.GailJohnsonbae 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
And why do you suppose people GET married in the first place?
No, it's not tacky for a pregnant woman to be in a wedding party.
I would, however, ask to bow out of the party - not so much because of your appearance - and I'm sure you will glow as many expectant moms do - but because of health reasons plus you're going to be planning for the birth of your child and won't have the energy or the time to devote to the bride - as much as you really would like to.
Also, 2 weeks early is considered "on time" so you may have to leave the ceremony due to your water breaking...
And your health and that of the baby's is by far far more important than your friend's wedding. Sorry bride - but that's the truth.
If she's your friend, then she'll understand. So plan on being there - maybe you could hand out programs or something that doesn't require the services of a real "bridesmaid." That way, if Jr. makes an early appearance (or if your MD says BED REST, SISTER!) you won't be leaving bride in the lurch.
and congrats. May baby be healthy and happy!
2007-10-29 08:51:28 · answer #1 · answered by Barbara B 7 · 0⤊ 3⤋
It is not tacky. I had a very pregnant friend in mine. I was also asked to be in a wedding where I would have been 8 months pregnant at the time of the wedding. I graciously declined because I wouldn't be able to wear the sexy gown and didn't want the wedding party to have to wear something else. Since this was my second pregnancy, I knew how uncomfortable I would feel by the time of the big day. I did attend the wedding, but was not in it. It's really up to you and how you think you'll feel at that time.
2007-10-29 08:54:19 · answer #2 · answered by DJ 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
NO, being pregnant all by itself isn't a reason not to be in a wedding party. Decades ago, if the preggo wasn't married it would have mattered, but nowadays it means nothing.
Only decline for your own reasons, like, if you are concerned you might drop early and miss the wedding, after all the planning and expense. But as far as how you will look, you will look fine.
BUT, the key is the dress. Make sure it is appropriate for a pregnant woman. Some people think, if it is way tight, way lowcut, way short, what is wrong with that? But I think it should suit your pregnant figure and look tasteful.
2007-10-29 09:34:42 · answer #3 · answered by danashelchan 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Congrats on the Baby!!!! How wonderful to have a baby and a wedding so together! You should feel honored that your friend wants you in the wedding and why on earth should she care if you are "big as a cow"? Pregnancy is a beautiful part of life... Just say thank you and join in the planning... Just remember to have your shoes a wide width size so that you won't have issues with your swollen feet - which is quite common during that month of pregnancy.Good Luck
2007-10-29 09:16:18 · answer #4 · answered by daniegirl917 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My MOH is my extremely pregnant sister-in-law. I asked her to be in my wedding because I love her and want her to be part of it. I think she was a bit concerned about her size, too. I just told her that if her water breaks, do it under the dress so I can't see. We can take the limo to the hospital.
By making light of it, she was able to look at things differently. I told her that I get 1 1/2 MOHs for the price of one.
Your friend wants YOU in the wedding. Regardless of size, baby, whatever. Just enjoy the day and be there for her. You'll look beautiful no matter what. If it helps you, talk to her about choosing a dress that accents your wonderful tummy. That's what we did with my MOH. Celebrate it.....and no one thinks a pregnant woman is anything but glowing and gorgeous.
Have a great time and good luck to your friend!!! My wedding countdown....2 weeks and 4 days.
2007-10-30 02:24:06 · answer #5 · answered by petunya_98 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A caring and thoughtful bride wants to be surrounded by the people she cares most about on her wedding day. An immature bride cares more about what the pictures will look like than the personalities standing beside her. If your friend isn't concerned about what you'll look like then you shouldn't give it a second thought. Pregnancy is a beautiful part of life and nothing to be ashamed of showing in a very public way. You might even bring her good luck, if she is planning to start a family soon.
2007-10-29 08:50:29 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
No...you won't be a big fat cow!! I have been to a few weddings with pregnant bridesmaids and I think it's great!
Go ahead with the plans...your friend still wants you to be involved, and you will NOT "ruin the entire look"!
2007-10-29 14:03:18 · answer #7 · answered by iloveweddings 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You won't ruin the look one bit, and clearly the bride agrees! She might choose to let each bridesmaid pick their own style dress in the same fabric - that way everyone will get a dress that looks good on them and you won't stand out with the "different" dress.
At 8 months, there is the potential that you won't be able to take part, so she should be ready to have an uneven bridal party should you deliver early or be medically unable to participate.
One small note: With both my pregnancies, by 7 months my legs, ankles & feet were really swollen. Don't count on being able to wear strappy shoes and consider a long dress in case you have "cankles" like me!
2007-10-29 08:52:46 · answer #8 · answered by eli_star 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There is nothing at all wrong with having a pregnant woman in the wedding party.
2007-10-29 09:53:09 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I attended a wedding last fall where the MOH was 8-1/2 mo pregnant. No one thought twice about it. Congrats on being pregnant! Good luck!
2007-10-29 08:47:45 · answer #10 · answered by Kit 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋