buffet vs sit-down - does it really matter to guests?

Question

I'm working on my fiance about this and he raised a good point - - what would our guests think?
We are planning a large wedding and have found a few places in our price range.
We can only offer one option if we do a sit-down dinner, which means that our guests will get what we decide - I think we would go with chicken.
We could do a buffet with 3 options (beef, chicken, fish or pasta) for the same price.
I like the idea of variety as well as our guests could go back for 2nds if they are hungry or not fill their plates up if they don't want as much food.
The increase in price to give sit-down selections in advance puts us over budget. And I find that people often forget what they chose anyway.
My fiance feels that the sit-down is classy and the buffet isn't.
I've been to great weddings with buffet-style dinners so I disagree with him.
What are your thoughts????

We are in central PA, while we don't want a casual "dress-down" wedding, we are not going absolutely formal. We are probably going with a Halloween theme and getting people up might be more conducive, too.

The places we are looking provide the same foods buffet or sit-down (including salads, rolls, etc), the only difference is with buffet you get to choose several "main course" items for the same price as us selecting one for the sit-down.

Answer 1

We had a buffet. Everyone was happy. And it cost me $10 per person instead of $25 per person.

As a guest, I prefer buffet. That way if I like one particular thing. I can fill up on that and no so much of what I don't like. And if I were a guest and you served me fish, for example, I'd have to leave the room. I can not STAND the smell of fish. It makes me want to vomit.

I also think it takes a lot longer for the servers to bring out plates than it does for guests to make their way through a line. I hate being the last one served at a sit-down. And once they even "forgot" about me and didn't have enough of the food that I KNOW I requested because I am very picky and it was the only option that I liked out of the three. But since I was at the LAST table served, someone else probably changed their mind and took my meal.

Another downside to the sit down style is that there WILL be people who end up showing up that never RSVP'ed that they were coming AND people who say they were coming and don't. With a buffet style, you don't have to worry about re-allocating that food to accomodate your guests at te last minute. They just go up and pick their food.

Go buffet! There is no way you can go wrong.

This isn't a hoidy toidy affair where you are charging $100 per plate for some high society fundraiser. It's your friends and family who are more concerned about your happiness and wouldn't want to have you spend more money than necessary.

Answer 2

Buffet is fine, I promise! Not only is it usually (not always) more cost effective, but you have all the positives you already mentioned! The choices, multiple trips, etc.

I have also found that most times you can afford to get a better quality of food on buffets for about the same price you would spend on mediocre food for a sit-down. Especially if you are the ones choosing the only food option. You would feel compelled to choose something rather mainstream and possibly boring like chicken to accomodate more guests' tastes. On the buffet you can choose boring chicken, great beef & unusual fish all at the same time!

The only warning I have is to make sure you get a proposal both ways from your caterer. You may be surprised about some things. For instance, at lots of halls the sit-down dinner prices sound high, but include three-four courses, breads, butters, water, tea, & coffee & even sometimes a dessert. Buffet prices usually include the food and that's it. Once you add in all the other stuff, it is sometimes a better deal & sometimes not, so be careful!

Answer 3

None of the weddings I have been to have served a full meal so I would welcome either as a guest. However I generally prefer buffets since I can pick and choose what goes on my plate and what doesn't.

Classy vs not is all in the presentation. I have seen some outstanding buffets that aren't tacky in the least. Perhaps you could compromise and have a plated salad and dessert and the main part of the meal be buffet.

Answer 4

Go with the buffet. First, you get more for your money and you have a way better selection.
We did this and we got rave reviews!!
People always like having choices and being able to pick what they like..even if they aren't the ones paying for it!
I would ask you husband-to-be which he feels is more classy:
a single plate serving with chicken and a couple sides (with nothing more to offer guests until the wedding cake and will surely bring on grumbling from your guests) or having multiple items to satisfy everyone.
Good luck!

Answer 5

I think the dinner style should go with the flow of the wedding and the couple. The best wedding I ever went to was buffet style with chicken fried steak and mashed potatoes. It fit the couple and it fit the wedding. Sure a classy elegant dinner is nice, but not necessary. I don't think guests care so much about the sit down/buffet thing as they do an open bar instead of a cash bar!

Answer 6

I have been to a wedding that had a buffet, it was at a vineyard and set up beautifully - very classy. Nobody complained.

I think it is better to have options. While most people like chicken (I personally love chicken), not everybody does and there may even be guests on your list who don't eat meat at all. Also, you don't want to strain yourself financially if it goes too over your budget.

Answer 7

We're having a buffet over family style due to financial reasons...the hall was going to charge 3.00 upcharge for that. Ummm no! I'm having a fancy wedding but alot of my family comes from the south and likes to eat...why make them feel uncomfortable? You seem so limited w/ family style not to mention passing dishes opens up the SPILL factor big time...no thanks. It's a personal preference overall.

For a buffet to be classy it must flow and be organized. Be sure to have the DJ announce tables and make sure the buffet is replenished before calling more tables...again...it has to have structure.

It will turn out great...your guests are coming for YOU not the food anyhow. :D

Answer 8

Sit down's do not give you enough options these days, especially with people who are vegetarian, kosher etc...My hubby and I went with the buffet at our wedding and I can't even being to tell you how many compliments we got. We picked a chicken, beef and fish so there were the best of meats along with two pasta dishes and salads and sides. It was amazing and everyone loved it. Besides don't you think it's annoying for someone to have to pick out what they're going to eat for dinner 3 months ahead of time!?

Answer 9

I have been to black tie weddings where there was a buffet. Your fiance is wrong about it being less formal. If people would actually look down upon you for it then they aren't the kind of people who should have been invited in the first place. People care about how the food tastes, not how it was served.

Answer 10

Depends what kind of affair you are doing. t you want to do a black-tie affair, then go with the sit-down, it is much more classy. Semi-formal and under, you can go with the buffet and it will look nice.

Also it depends where you live. I live in the Northeast and every wedding I have been to up here has been sit-down as opposed to 2 weddings I went to down south that were both buffet.