hi there. Thanks for reading. My husband is being deployed for the first time. I am so scared for his life. He is in the AF by the way. Due to OPSEC i cant say where and when but its going to be for a while that he will be gone. a few months. It scares me. I hope this is normal to worry for his life. He seems so calm about it. I however am not. I have so many bad thoughts running through my head. I try not to dwell but if you personally have not been through then you don't and wont understand. I worry he would leave me or be hurt or killed and it scares me so much. I just want him to hurry leave do what he has to do and get back safely. We are based in germany by the way. AGH im just so scared. any military wives have any insight advice anything? i suffer from SEVERE depression and social anxity so its going to be so hard for me to get a job while hes a way. I wish i could explain but its hard. anyways thanks in adveance for helping me it's truly appreciated
2007-10-28 21:45:22 · 9 answers · asked by :] 4 in Politics & Government ➔ Military
thank you all :)
also my depression is delt with on my own i hate being on medications as they make me numb emotionally i really do think i should see a doc before i leave so he can evaluate me and i can see what options i have. no use in suffering right?
secondly I wont be staying in Germany while he is gone i will be going back home because i dont feel comfortable staying in a country that i still havent grown accsutomed to.
and also no he works with computers he wont be in combat.. i dont think anyways ?
just wanted to thank you all ill try to get used to it. its just been a stressful year losing two babies in the last few months and then finding out hubby is leaving but i guess i need to get used to it now
2007-10-28 22:00:06 · update #1
I am faithful to my husband thanks. I think its rude you would even say such a rude and inappropriate thing to such a serious question. I have reported you to yahoo for sexual harassment
2007-10-28 23:12:29 · update #2
its hard for everyone. no deployments are easy. i think that it is good you are going home during the deployment. keep busy and dont watch too much CNN. I always worry when my hubby is gone. make sure that his command knows where you are so they can keep you updated. My hubbys command sends out updates every week or so, its very helpful to know everyone is alright. get to know some of the other wives. it helps ahving friends that are going through the same things as you are. good luck and take care of yourself. by the way, your hubby (whether he admits it or not) is probably excited and scared. the sooner he leaves the better, then the black cloud goes away and you can plan a great homecoming for him!
2007-10-29 03:40:49 · answer #1 · answered by navywife 3 · 3⤊ 1⤋
It's difficult for all the families left behind by military personnel. My brother has just been deployed, like you I'm terrified of hearing some harm has come to him. It does get easier with every deployment but you'll always worry. I know it's hard but always think possitively. Make plans for the future when communicating with him, look forward and don't even contemplate the what ifs. He will be back in no time so don't worry, you need too be strong, the last thing he needs is to be worrying about you.
Is there any family or friends to give you extra support during this time? Talk too them! It will help.
2007-10-28 22:01:18 · answer #2 · answered by spider 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It is hard, but sadly you will get used to it given the nature of the world at the moment. The first few days are the worst but gradually you will get used to him not being there. Write everyday and e-mail regularly if you can. Send parcels, going around the shops picking out things to send actually helps. Send photos of yourself. Whatever you do, please do not put your life on hold, easier said than done. Go to spouse deployment meetings, being around people going through the same thing is blessing in itself. I have been in your place, I know what you are going through, and it is not easy. Be proud of your husband serving his country, he will be proud of you coping without him running the house etc.. Do not be afraid to ask for help, you do not need to get a job if you don't feel up to it. Just take each day as it comes and each day is a day closer to him coming home. Do not focus on the negative otherwise getting up in the morning becomes difficult. There are risks, but statistically he has more chance dying in a car crash in your home town. Be cheerful if he calls, he doesn't need to worry about you as well as doing his job. Finally enjoy the time before he goes and make sure you have quality time when he returns.
2007-10-28 22:40:51 · answer #3 · answered by Elizabeth L 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
If you didn't worry about your husband's healthy and safety, then you wouldn't be normal! :) Is your depression in check right now? Don't be surprised if after he leaves, you hit rock bottom for a couple of days.. my friends and I used to say we'd give each other 1 week after our husband's left, to feel like crap, and then you'd better be back on the ball. Have you made any friends in Germany since you got there? It helps to have a tight group of friends, either in the same situation, or who have already been there. In reality, your husband may appear calm, but he's probably a little bit worried to. Right before he goes, don't be surprised if you guys start nipping at each other. Its normal to argue a lot right before he leaves and when he gets back. My husband's getting ready to get deployed again, this will be our 9th deployment in 11 years. It never gets any easier, you just get better at dealing with it together. Just remember your job is to stay home and stay strong, just as much as his job is to go and do what he does.
2007-10-28 21:55:06 · answer #4 · answered by Denise S 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Dont worry everything will be fine, I think you going home to be with family and friends is a grea thing, many spouses do that for the extra support, worrying yourself isnt healthy, keeping busy will help, I understand your medical problems as we have all fallen into a depression once our spouses leave, but the best thiing for you to do is Pray for his safety, and telling him before he leaves how much you love him.
deployments are never easy, you just have to trust in God and everything will fall into place I promise.
God Bless you and your family.
Armywife & Soldier
2007-10-29 03:51:31 · answer #5 · answered by Justice35 4 · 3⤊ 1⤋
He's not carrying a gun or flying bombs over the Middle East is he? He'll be fine if he's not the trigger man. Relax. The sooner you overcome your fears of his being gone, the sooner you'll realize your family needs you as much as you need him. That's where to start.
2007-10-28 21:55:51 · answer #6 · answered by Your Uncle Dodge! 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Dont worry. Everything will be fine. Let time do its own job.
Still u feel lonely and need advice, i m always there. Ping me if u need any further help.
2007-10-28 21:50:59 · answer #7 · answered by ? 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just stay strong... a few months isnt bad, the time will fly by if you keep busy...Try doing 15 - 18 months.
2007-10-29 03:00:35 · answer #8 · answered by *Army*Wife* 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Hang in there I am sure it will all work out.
2007-10-28 23:07:49 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 6⤋