Why am I so Damn sad since going through a divorce?

Question

It's been three years!!!!!

Answer 1

I am dealing with a similar situation.
I have come to the conclusion that when we feel sad well after it is time to move on it is because we are mourning the loss of the relationship that we wanted, not the relationship that we had.
If we mourn the one we had, we can move on quickly and realize that it didnt work out like we had planned.
If we mourn the relationship that we wanted, we will never move on because we are forever stuck in the thinking that the relationship could have been this or it could have been that. We are mourning our imagination.
Take a look at how the relationship really was. Examine it, miss it, love it, then let it go. I hope you find closure!

Answer 2

You are still grieving ... over so many things. Grieving what you thought would be a lifetime together. Grieving the loss of love. The unborn children, perhaps. The dreams you shared that will now never come true. All the future days you thought you would spend together, that you now won't.

The more you loved, often the more you grief.

And maybe being alone now has forced you to deal with yourself and issues that were never resolved from childhood ...

Sometimes grief is complicated by other bad things that have happened to us, and it can seem overwhelming.

It might help to talk to a counsellor about what you are feeling ... three years is long enough that you need to start dealing with things. But don't feel guilty or bad that you are still sad. We all heal at our own pace. But just be aware that it might be time to try to get some help in getting over this. And then do it, but don't beat yourself up over needing help. It is normal.

Take care. Just recognizing your feelings is the first step.

Answer 3

On the scale of stressful occurrences Divorce or Death of a family member rank at the top. Compared to a 10 earthquake, you've got a stress-quake running through your body and mind and emotions. You totally have to reorient how you live. And, if you have kids........it's never "over".

Three years, though is getting to be a long time to still be feeling the sadness every day.

My suggestion would be to see a counselor or therapist or your family Dr. Remember, sadness can also come from physical problems with your body, too. (like iron deficiency or non-working thyroid, etc. ) It is time to get it checked-out.

Answer 4

It is a major Life altering change. Never been there so I can't say I understand - Still married, but I don't understand your sadness - LOL, I am sorry just trying to break the ice here.
I think in a way I do understand, I would find it hard to deal with my life turn upside down. My brother, life is hard and sh*t is thrown at you. You have to stand tall and take it and wipe it off and say "I AM A MAN"!!
No woman should have that much control over you.
I am guessing that children are involved - That may be why it is so hard. YOU HAVE FATHERS RIGHTS.
My advice go see your kids (To hell with her), you are there for them, not her!!!!
Get over it - See other women (There are alot of fish in the sea --- For real - I seen them!!!!!!).
If your a father be one but a Man and look and find another woman that will want to be with you!!!
Stop being sad!!!!

Answer 5

Maybe because something you thought would work out in the beginning,didn't.That is one of the top ten reasons for depression,whether you wanted the divorce or not.

Answer 6

Probably, you're still inlove with your spouse. Another is, you don't have anyone to look forward to. Try to have fun and relaxation. Have a date and explore the world. Life is too short. Don't waste anytime without spending it to the fullest.

Answer 7

a divorce is a major life change. I would suggest getting counselling and if you need it antidepressants.