There's a couple I know at school. They usually get along together really well. She'll come over during open hours, and do her homework in his bed, or they'll watch the game together in the lounge a lot... But about once every other month, one day I'll see her outside his room covered in tears, just sitting there in the hall for hours. A lot of times he and his roommate will both be hanging out inside the whole time. Sometimes they'll be walking together, and she'll be in tears shouting and crying.
When I talk to her it's always the same story about having a rough day, being sick, or having been a clutz and injured herself, and her roommates not letting her in for some reason, and her boydfriend being a jerk and her not knowing why.
When I talk to him it's always the same too. She's had a bad day, she's on a lot of medications that affect mood.
Everybody is wondering if she's being abused. She says she's in therapy for something though.
What should we do?
2007-10-28 12:51:20 · 12 answers · asked by ye_river_xiv 6 in Health ➔ Mental Health
very good the light went off in your head telling you something is wrong i hope you do something in the mental health business. when someone is being emotionally abused they cant recognize what is happening he is taking advantage of her. no guy is worth losing your self esteem over i can say that now but I'm way older now. but, when you are in the situation like that he is wanting to control her, and he is doing a good job,making her sit outside the room omg.,, it gets worse ruining your self esteem, not letting you see your own friends, taking your money away telling you that you at crap with out them.. if you are a good friend bug her little by little see if you can get her away from him, if that isn't easy or he wont let her go with you. she is in real trouble and needs counseling or you guys tell her shrink. he sounds very controlling. my mind is flashing on my situations when i was younger. but i always fought back and it took me years to get out.
2007-10-28 13:10:03 · answer #1 · answered by sheilasays 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds as if this girl is depressed and/or in an unhappy relationship. She may or may not be suffering from abuse. I have been in relationships that made me cry all the time, but it wasn't physical abuse, just emotional neglect that upset me. I would look for more concrete signs before concluding that he's hurting her. Have you ever heard him make derogatory remarks about her? Are there any bruises that she has trouble explaining? Does she seem scared and deferential around her boyfriend?
If you are in a uni setting, you may want to consider confidentially sharing your concerns with a school counselor. If it is the same counselor that your friend visits, then the mental health professional can keep an eye on her. Other than that, just let your friend know that you will be a listening ear if she has a rough day. She might end up confiding in you and sharing what's wrong if you give her time. I think you seem like a caring friend, and it's great that you want to help her. Don't jump to conclusions yet, but keep your eyes open and be there for her when she has bad days.
2007-10-28 14:02:40 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i do no longer think of anyone could strategies somebody crying for the justifications which you have have been given stated. those are stable for advantageous. subject is, that sometimes, there could be an end to the crying in some unspecified time interior the destiny. If there is not any bring about sight, elect you purchased punched 3 weeks in the past, and you're nevertheless crying---that is a situation. LOL Or, your mom had maximum cancers and has long undergone scientific care and is wonderful now, yet you're nevertheless boo hoo'ing approximately it, properly as quickly as extra, you're in straightforward terms a waaaa'er who enjoys self pity. My guy acquaintances are exceedingly tolerant of me crying, and ladies normally, and can sense soooooo basically undesirable for the guy, yet they distinctly sense undesirable whilst the lady isn't a cry little one to start with, so it truly stands proud and it truly touches them deeply.
2016-11-09 19:10:17 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nothing you can really do if she doesn't want the help. Sounds like you have tried to talk with her and help but she isn't willing to share much...at least right now. If abuse is occurring and she feels she loves this guy she isn't going to convict him. Let her know you are always there in case she ever needs you. Build trust with her and when she is ready, she will know where to come for help. You can talk to her about what it is she is feeling when she cries, about relationships, what she thinks about herself, and you can tell her how you feel about seeing her sad. There are pamphlets available on abuse....give one or even more to her and let her know you are not making any judgments but wanted her to have these......just in case.
Have you talked with the roommates? Or is this what you have been told by her? I think I might start by asking the roommates some simple concerned questions without judgment or opinions. You might get a better idea of what is happening.
2007-10-28 13:07:38 · answer #4 · answered by ~mobabe~ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like she is being abused. It could
verbal abuse or physical. You never know but, if she is aways upset there is something wrong. I would tell someone if it continues. Try to continue to talking to her she may open up to you once she feels she has a person she can confide in. Just be her friend that is all you can really do.
2007-10-28 13:09:45 · answer #5 · answered by John 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a serious situation. It could be depression, mood swings, or she could just be over dramatic. Personally I think if she's not telling you she needs help, then she dosen't. I think you should just leave her alone and let her deal with this herself.
If by any chance you do have proof
that her boyfriend is abuseing her. Then by all means you should go and get help.
Good luck!
2007-10-28 13:02:08 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its really none of your business if she is really on medication, but if you think she is abused you can help her. Offer to talk to her, cheer her up on those bad days. Befriend her, and maybe you will eventually know whats going on with her on the those days, and you will have a clue as to if she is being abused.
2007-10-28 13:00:45 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
if she is just crying a lot and you dont see any physical evidence that she is being abused maybe she is not. she probably had been through something very tough and cries over it. maybe she is a very emotional person. girls are like that.. i wouldn't worry about it too much just try to be her friend and she if she need some one to talk to other than her boyfriend.
2007-10-28 13:01:47 · answer #8 · answered by <3 luke is here!! <3 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes medications can cause mood swings. Has she been to the doctor recently to have her meds checked and told him about her mood swings? She is either suffering from depression or she could even be bi-polar.
2007-10-28 13:02:34 · answer #9 · answered by ? 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Omg! it sounds like she IS being abused, dude you need to talk to this guy but when he starts saying his routine, stop him and be like "are you hurting her" or somthing like that, you HAVE to bring it up, cause if this girl is really being hurt you cant just sit back and wonder......take action
Lots of Love, Sara
2007-10-28 13:01:21 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋